Category Archives: Embrace the Season

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The “I Love My Garden” Edition

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Well, as I write this it is 7 degrees Celsius and we had a huge hailstorm this weekend that mushed flat all my garden beds and flowers. Prior to this, with the heat and the no mosquitoes, I was thinking what was wrong with me all these years, Calgary is not so bad, look at this beautiful summer, and well. Well, complaining gets us nowhere AND I have enjoyed my summer and my garden immensely, and seasons change and so do I. Calgary has many great things about it; the weather is not generally one of them.

Sometimes during the summer I wonder what I do with my time when I don’t have the garden to tend to, which is how I feel now with the weather changed and no need to water or work in the garden. What DO I do with my time? Oh yeah, I usually have a job.

Anyway, I love my garden immoderately. I have been working on the flower beds for twenty years – twenty! – and over the last two years I have delved into herb gardening. This year, as you know, I started my first vegetable garden and it has been so satisfying. I mean, it’s not like we are saving lots of money growing our own vegetables, because it was kind of expensive to build the garden beds and fill them, but it’s been so much fun.

Let’s tour around my garden, shall we?

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The “I Love My Garden” Edition

The Perennials

My entire goal with perennials is to have something blooming at all times of the year, so I mix up early and late bloomers, as well as long bloomers, and so there is always something pretty and colourful to look at.

Early spring:

June:

July:

August:

The roses bloom from July until September, as does the yarrow and ornamental sage.

My hostas and creeping Jenny are quite stunted this year, partly because of the hot, dry weather, and partly because Barkley, in his dotage, has decided to walk through them several times a day. If admonished, he stands in them, staring at me in a what are you going to do kind of way, and since there is nothing I am going to do to discipline a 13-year-old dog with cancer, I guess I’ll live with my stunted shade garden.

Speaking of Barkley, every single day when we are walking – every day! – someone will stop me to ask “what’s wrong with your dog?” and it gets very tiresome. While I appreciate the sentiment of concern, I very much dislike the conversation that follows, and I am much too polite not to answer. I prefer the days when people would stop me to tell me how cute he is or to ask about his breed. He’s still cute and I still think Labradoodles are a wonderful breed! Please don’t ask about his giant growth on his side.

The Annuals

Over the years I have used annuals to fill in the blanks in my perennial garden beds, but now there…are no blanks. I use annuals mostly in containers in our very dry and shady front yard, as well as this pretty little one in our very sunny back yard:

The Herbs

I cook every single day but apparently, I don’t use many fresh herbs. The past few years I’ve been buying an assorted ten-pack of herbs from a fundraiser, and while I’ve enjoyed the element of surprise as to which herbs I’ve received, I’m not going to do that again. I only ever use fresh cilantro, basil, and oregano, and the rest I just water and…do nothing with. Well, not nothing. I am in the process of drying all the herbs for winter use – I do use a lot of dried herbs, but I don’t tend to use recipes with dried herbs in the summer.

If you’re interested in drying herbs, I really recommend a dehydrator. Also? Basil is a bitch to dry, with the thick leaves. As an example, parsley takes about two hours to dry in a dehydrator, and basil takes…a lot longer. I have no idea how much longer because I kept checking it over the course of two days, discovering the leaves still weren’t dry, and then restarting the dehydrator, only to forget about it for hours at a time.

Last year I attempted mint extract and it was a complete failure. I am not sure if it was user error or if I had the wrong kind of mint; I have so much mint this year and nothing to do with it. I might try the extract again, but I’m not sure if I want to waste the vodka on it.

The Veggies

This is my first year of veggie gardening; the guys built and filled five garden boxes for me, and I really recommend this kind of gardening. I’m a bendy kind of girl, but having the raised beds is just wonderful. Also, Barkley pees on the side of the garden boxes, and if the beds were in the ground he would be peeing on our vegetables, which seems suboptimal.

This year we grew radishes, carrots, beets, lettuce, kale, peas, potatoes, tomatoes, and zucchini with a lot of success, although I will say that next year I will use seed tape for the smaller seeds as I am terrible at thinning things out. I also tried peppers and cucumbers, which were unsuccessful – unsurprising, perhaps, but if there was any summer they could grow it would have been this one, with the heat.

I think next year I will increase the amount of kale, decrease the carrots, and omit the radishes altogether. I thought I would enjoy growing carrots more than I do; although if I use seed tape it’s sure to be more satisfying than my tiny, unthinned carrots.

Our growing season is so short here; at best, I have another month, but realistically we could get frost any day now, and snow in September is not unusual. I’ve made the best of the growing season, and I will enjoy it for as long as it lasts! Do you garden? Tell me everything. xo

Summer’s Almost Gone; Seventy-Five Weeks In

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I don’t think I can adequately describe the relief I felt when I received an email from the Calgary Board of Education, stating that not only would masks be mandatory for students K-12, but all other health protocols would remain in place. With the Delta variant of Covid cases skyrocketing, again, and the general mask mandate dropped in the province, I was somewhat concerned about in-person school. I just want my kids to go to school for the year, and maybe even see my oldest have a graduation ceremony, is that too much to wish for. But I was so happy to get the email about masking; masks kept us all so healthy last year – we’ve never had such an illness-free year – and with all of us fully vaccinated, I feel even better.

I was feeling less happy to see that school starts not on September 7, like I thought it did, but September 1, which means this is the last week of summer, I’m not ready. I am just not in the headspace yet, but I’ll get there, and meanwhile, our hot summer weather ended abruptly and now it’s cool and rainy and it feels like fall. The universe is trying to prepare me, is what I’m saying.

August is a month where I always feel a little glum and melancholy and Landslide-y, and the grey, chilly, rainy days are exacerbating those feelings. Well, these days are good for getting things done in the house – when it’s warm and sunny I spend most of my day outdoors, and there were a few things I really did want to get done before school starts (NEXT WEEK OMG) and I get back to teaching yoga and we are all busy with our fall schedules. Like making jam.

My husband reminds me that we have air conditioning, if I want to make jam on a warm day I can, but I never do want to do that. Jam making is for chilly days, I will die on this hill and also we have many months of chilly days, but few warm ones.

So Many Empty Boxes

One of the things I have wanted to accomplish practically since the pandemic hit was to clean out our storage/ furnace room. My husband, god bless him, likes to keep the original boxes of any electronic equipment while said equipment is under warranty, just in case there’s an issue. The problem is that he never gets rid of the boxes after the warranty expires, and therefore we have perfectly good storage shelves that are jammed full of empty boxes. We still had the PS4 box from Christmas 2014, for example, along with boxes for stereo equipment we no longer own.

Summer is coming to an end, the pandemic has been going on for seventy-five weeks, I go back to teaching in two weeks, IT IS TIME TO CLEAN OUT THE FURNACE ROOM. I took out every single box, rearranged everything, and was able to put all the bins full of childhood art and school projects, bicycle gear, and assorted sports things ACTUALLY IN THE STORAGE ROOM instead of behind my son’s drum set. He’s thrilled that he no longer hits his elbow on the bins when he’s practicing.

This is the van full of cardboard my older son and I took to the recycle depot, and doesn’t include the three garbage bags full of packing materials, RIP our earth, that came out of the boxes.

Not one day after The Big Cleanup, my husband – in a typical act of service to make my life easier – had ordered some new windshield wiper blades for my car. As he grabbed his keys for the garage, he said “Don’t throw out these boxes, just in case these blades don’t fit.” Dear reader. I answered him with a look only and, fortunately for our marriage and everyone involved, they DID fit and my husband subsequently recycled the boxes.

No YouTube Videos On How To Break In To Your House

Speaking of the garage, a couple of weeks ago older son went to get out the lawn mower, and couldn’t unlock the garage door. We typically lock the person door with just the knob, rather than the deadbolt, and while the key fit in the knob, it wouldn’t open. Obviously the automatic openers for the big car door were in the cars that were locked in the garage, and the keypad has not worked for years. My husband searched up YouTube videos but to no avail: all videos instructed what to do if you were locked INSIDE a house, rather than outside, because I guess YouTube doesn’t want to advertise how to break into someone’s home.

Anyway, it was either call a locksmith or actually break down the door, and we took the former option. We now have a garage door that locks by deadbolt only, in case such a thing should happen again. Unfortunately, we are all in the muscle memory mode of just twisting and locking the knob, and the number of times I’ve thought oh yeah, I need the key to lock the door over the past couple of weeks is extensive.

Burn Baby Burn

Remember how my son, after his braces removal, wanted to burn all his orthodontic elastics, and, failing that, his masks? This is what happened on the Annual Boys’ Camping Trip:

Pyromaniac dreams do come true, I guess. You are still going to need masks! I admonished him after seeing these photos, but he countered with a) it was just one mask, and b) that mask was unravelling anyway. Was it? Was it really? Well, he does have at least eight other masks, and it’s not hard to get masks now anyway, and what happens on the Annual Boys’ Camping Trip stays on the Annual Boys’ Camping Trip.

I Have Found My People

You all know how I feel about Thoreau and, also, many of the widely celebrated male authors/ fictional characters (Jay Gatsby, I’m looking at you). So I was so excited to discover this podcast:

The Fuckbois of Literature! If you, like me, think that maybe a person can’t claim to be self-sustaining while living intentionally in the woods when his mother is bringing him sandwiches and doing his laundry, then this is the podcast for you.

I’ll Take The Rapists For $500, Alex

On Peloton, people have the option to add a hashtag to their user profile, and those hashtags are used to connect with other people. Sometimes the hashtag has to do with a favourite instructor – I, for example, am part of the #yestoyoucrew and my son is a #denismenace – sometimes it concerns career choices, interests, or life in general, like #teachersofpeloton, #pelotonmoms, #peloforwine, #pelotonsingles.

I was riding the other day and the person on the leaderboard ahead of me had the hashtag #therapistsofpeloton and friends, it took me a really long time to realize that it was therapists of Peloton and not the rapists of Peloton. I spent some time being shocked that a) someone would cop to being a rapist, and b) there was a whole group of rapists, connecting through exercise.

In my defense, it was pretty early in the morning and I hadn’t yet drank my whole pot of coffee.

Outfit of the Week

I’m really glad I posted all those summery outfits, because SUMMER IS OVER and it’s time to pull out my jeans, socks, and long-sleeve shirts. This top dates from 2016, and I bought it in the small town where my parents live. Isn’t it cute? It’s great for this kind of weather as it’s too thin for winter, but great for a typical Calgary summer day!

The whole reason I have started the Outfit of the Week was to appreciate and express gratitude for my wardrobe; I am thinking about taking it off the blog and onto Instagram only, where outfits of the week belong. You all know I love clothes; I love reading fashion blogs and I love seeing Outfit of the Day posts. If you, like me, also enjoy seeing what people are wearing, you can check it out on Instagram. If you’ve hated my OOTW, lucky you! No more scrolling by to get to my weekly reading list.

Pandemic Reading List

The Soulmate Equation. I have read and enjoyed a few books from Christina Lauren, and this one did not disappoint. It’s just a very sweet and fun romance with very loveable characters. The main character is a single mom and freelance statistician (how often does that happen in a romance book, the statisticians are highly underrepresented in fiction) who is matched up with the founder of a DNA-based matchmaking company. Throw in her energetic seven-year-old and her romance-writer best friend, and you have got yourself a feel-good read.

Think Like A Monk. This book was so inspiring! As you know, I love the idea of living a peaceful and purposeful life, and this book deals with the kind of mindsets that work towards such an ideal. From feeding your brain positive material to finding your life’s calling, this book is full of wisdom and inspiration.

I discovered that I have a LOT of internal work to do. I enjoyed this book so much I started listening to the author’s podcast, and the first one I listened to had an interview with an absolutely lovely young woman, who spoke intelligently and with great enthusiasm about overcoming trials in life, the biggest being the death of her mother when she was a teenager. She was witty and smart and spoke about her work to empower young girls and women, and after the podcast I looked up the show notes to see who this remarkable young woman was. The link took me to her Instagram account, and people: if I had seen her Instagram first, I would have never listened to the podcast. I would have completely dismissed her as having nothing to say, and I would have been very wrong. It was a wake-up call that I need to examine my own biases as a person. Well, it’s a journey. We all have work to do.

And on that note, it’s Monday of the LAST WEEK OF SUMMER and although it doesn’t feel summery, I am going to embrace it. I hope you do too. xo

You’ve Got Questions, I’ve Got Answers

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Last week, I asked you to ask me questions, and ask you did! Thank you so much – this was really fun! Here we go!

Books and Reading

Ally asked: My question is: given your druthers, which book genre is your favorite? And why? I will put this question together with one of Suzanne’s, which is What are, in your opinion, the best books of all time?

I’ve been thinking about Ally’s question all week, because I’m not sure if there is a specific name for my favourite genre. For my entire life, I have strongly preferred books that feature a female protagonist, and that follow that protagonist’s life. I like books that delve into the details of people’s lives; I think people are endlessly fascinating, and that everyone has a story. I am also a “Can Lit” girl, and to that end, two of my favourite authors are Margaret Atwood and Alice Munro; I love a good solid short story and I love books about women. I vastly prefer women’s writing over men’s, and I prefer a deep dive into an individual’s life, rather than a grand epic. In terms of genre, it’s almost easier to say what I DON’T like: I don’t like dystopian, fantasy, horror, or sci-fi, and I don’t tend to like mysteries much, although I’ve read a few lately and I do like to keep my mind open. In terms of best books of all time, the ones that I have loved the most are: Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen, The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood, Cat’s Eye by Margaret Atwood, Lives of Girls and Women by Alice Munro, Diary of a Provincial Lady by EM Delafield, and Mists of Avalon by Marion Zimmer Bradley. Any of those would be my “desert island” books, along with this really great meditation book I’ve been reading called Wake Up To The Joy In You, although if I was on a desert island, I am not sure the life advice in it would be necessary. Still, an excellent book about becoming your best self and embracing life.

Anna asked: My questions are when do you read and how do you read so fast!! I’ve always been a fast reader, and I generally block off time to read every day. A few years ago I discovered the “screen time report” on my phone and I was appalled to see how much time I wasted mindlessly scrolling, and so I’ve tried to take that time back to concentrate on books. I generally read a solid hour in the evenings, sometimes more, and then I read in little chunks throughout the day – when I’m having lunch, or if I’m waiting for an appointment, or if I’m stirring pasta sauce. I think it probably all adds up to about two hours a day of reading, sometimes more, sometimes less. This summer, with my yoga teaching on hold, I have been reading more than that.

These Are A Few Of My Least Favourite Things

Suzanne asked: What are some of your top pet peeves? OMG PEOPLE WHO DO NOT RETURN THEIR GROCERY CARTS TO THE CART CARREL THOSE PEOPLE ARE MONSTERS. Grocery carts are, of course, my trigger, but I also include actions that would make someone else’s life easier but are left undone, and that would require only a tiny amount of effort: not holding a door or elevator for someone, not allowing a car to merge into a lane, not gesturing to the mom with a baby and only a few groceries to go first in line. I also hate when a job is 99% done but LEFT UNDONE: as an example, the people I live with are excellent at changing the toilet paper roll or putting another bar of soap in the shower, but then they LEAVE THE EMPTY ROLL AND SOAP BOX ON THE COUNTER INSTEAD OF PUTTING IT IN THE RECYCLE BIN, THAT SAME RECYCLE BIN THEY ALL WALK PAST DOZENS OF TIMES A DAY. The same goes for the juice container that sits, rinsed out and empty, on the kitchen island.

I also hate when the grocery store changes their product layout and I find myself walking down each aisle, looking for my everyday items and wondering why the cereal is now with the aluminum foil, and why the peppermint extract is now with spices and not with baking needs.

Love and Marriage

Ernie asked: I’m wondering how you met your husband and maybe what your first date was, or if you knew right away he was THE ONE? Oh, ho, this is funny. So, I met my husband when he was a grad student and I was a fourth-year honour student preparing to be a grad student, and we were both studying economics. My first thought was “He’s pretty hot to be in economics,” which I still stand by. At the time, I had an on-again-off-again boyfriend, but we became friends and went out frequently for coffee and to movies. This went on for almost TWO YEARS, and I had broken up with my boyfriend and gone out on several dates with other guys during that time, and he dated some girls as well.

At some point, when you’ve been friends with a guy for almost two years, you just figure that nothing is ever going to happen between the two of you, even if there’s all sorts of sexy tension and you find yourself looking into each other’s eyes a lot and finding excuses to sit close to each other and accidentally touch each other on the knee and whatnot. God, I can’t stand it, I said to a girlfriend, It’s just never going to happen and I have to accept it.

Three weeks after that statement, we started dating, and by “dating” I mean basically going out like we always did, but also, um, having sex. Hilariously, the night we started “dating” we were supposed to go see the movie The Full Monty, and I guess I did actually see A Full Monty, but not The Full Monty.

Suzanne asked: What are your secrets to a happy marriage? Lots of Full Monty! Ha! I kid. Well, I’m not totally kidding – I do think intimacy is very important, and during a pandemic with teens at home all day every day things get…challenging to schedule, if you know what I mean, and I think you do. Honestly, I think one of the keys to a harmonious marriage is to really calmly communicate and to think before speaking, which can be challenging when people leave empty toilet paper rolls on the bathroom countertop. I also think it’s really important to accept the person your spouse is – empty toilet paper roll notwithstanding – and to realize that people express their love in different ways. My husband, for example, is a person who carefully and thoroughly researches everything, and makes purchases based on things he thinks will make my life better or easier, and those things always DO make my life better or easier. I, on the other hand, am not great at choosing gifts but I am good at doing things that make our life smooth and harmonious. My husband would never buy me flowers – he’s allergic – but when I mentioned, years ago, I was thinking about getting a dehydrator to make kale chips, he carefully looked into it, read every review, and then the Excalibur ended up on my doorstep one day.

You never really know what goes on in someone else’s marriage, and what makes it tick, but I think that putting yourself in your spouse’s shoes and being empathetic is important, as is not taking each other for granted, which, as we know, is easier said than done. Sometimes I get all up in arms thinking no one is appreciating my efforts, but then I think did I appreciate HIS efforts lately? and when I do, I find that he also does.

Family, Etc

Suz asked: Do you have any siblings? If you don’t have siblings, do you have cousins that are like siblings? I have two brothers, and between them I have a wonderful sister-in-law, eight nieces and nephews, and one great-niece! To paraphrase my friend Trudy (HI TRUDY) I knew I was good, but now I’m GREAT! I also have thirty-one first cousins! So, it’s a large family.

My husband has been watching Ted Lasso, and at the end of the season there’s a line about the family you’re born with, and the family you create along the way. I am so lucky to have friends who are like sisters to me – you girls know who you are!

Food, Etc.

Gigi asked: As for my question – what is your most decadent indulgence – the one that no matter the cost (or calories) it will always be in your home? I always, always have red wine in the house, usually a case worth at least. I always have baking on hand, and chocolate, but those are more for the guys than for me – wine is my indulgence. I hesitate to write this, because it sounds absolutely obnoxious, but in terms of cost, I never skimp in the produce aisle. I like to make dinners the way I like them and while I loosely stick to a grocery budget, when it comes to vegetables I am willing to pay whatever the cost. I have paid $10 for a tiny head of cauliflower, and if peppers are $6.99 a pound, I will still buy ten of them. I know what that sounds like – vegetables are my indulgence – but I guess I’m not willing at this point in my life to go without the things I like.

Suzanne asked: Desert island foods, films, books, music? Do you ever get weirdly obsessed with something? Like, I kept thinking what kind of desert island, would it be like Lord of the Flies or Blue Lagoon? Or Gilligan’s Island? Are these things I would take on a three-hour tour or what? Anyway, weird thoughts notwithstanding, I answered the books piece above, and as for films, I’m going to go with When Harry Met Sally, the single greatest movie of all time. I would take my “Nicole Karaoke” Spotify playlist, and as for foods, my number one favourite, I-could-eat-this-every-day meal is Greek salad with hummus and pita. Also coffee. If there’s no coffee, I would be 100% alone on the desert island due to murder.

Putting The Om in OMG

Suzanne asked: Do you have any life mottos you return to often? Or maybe the best/most useful advice you’ve ever gotten? My favourite motto, and one I try to live by, is “Bloom where you are planted.” Throughout my life, through different stages, jobs, and positions, I try to bloom. Two recent mottos that I have adopted are “Embrace the season” and, from my recent Anne reading, “If you can’t shine like a star, shine like a candlestick.” One of my favourite pieces of advice is from my dear friend Allison (HI ALLISON), for when I’m in a difficult or uncomfortable situation: “There will be a time after this.” It has helped me get through many awkward times.

Anna asked: When you do your AM yoga do you follow a plan or do it on your own? Namaste! I have been a long-time Ashtanga practitioner, which follows a set sequence of asana. Up until the pandemic, I practiced Mysore-style Ashtanga, which is essentially a “practice at your own pace, and a teacher helps you when you need it” kind of practice. It set me up perfectly for a pandemic home practice; after years of practice I just automatically flow through the postures, so it is truly a moving meditation. Until 2019, I practiced into the second series, but after injuring my hip while running I focused on healing and gentleness with myself, and now I mainly practice a modified primary series, omitting six postures which are hard on my hip, with extra planks and backbends thrown in. Some days I only do the standing sequence followed by a long meditation, some days I do a restorative practice, but I always get on my mat, whether it be for five minutes or an hour. It sets me up for my day.

Well, this was very fun! Thanks everyone for your questions, and, blog friends, I encourage you to put the “ask me anything” question out to your readers, it is a fun way to connect. Until next time! xo

Who Moved My…Clothes; Seventy-Four Weeks In

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Every evening I choose a yoga/ workout outfit, complete with hairband and scrunchie, and I set those things in the bathroom; that way, when I wake up early I just slip into my clothes and I’m ready for my yoga practice and workout, without having to disturb anyone. I have been doing this essentially every day since 2008; it’s just part of my day.

I had plans for a big hike with my friends Janet and Susan (HI JANET HI SUSAN) on Tuesday, so Monday night I had packed up my backpack with clothing layers and water bottles, I had set out my hiking boots and poles, I had a lunch in the fridge and my hiking clothes set out on the table, AND I had my yoga clothes in the bathroom, so I could do a nice stretchy practice before a 15 km hike.

Tuesday morning, around 4:15 am, I started the coffee maker and headed to the bathroom to get dressed, and there were no yoga clothes. Confused, I stumbled back out to look at the table where my hiking gear was: no yoga clothes. I looked all over, including pawing through the kids’ laundry baskets – in the dark – and no yoga clothes. I finally tiptoed back into the bedroom, quietly grabbed a couple of pieces, and got dressed.

Have you ever became completely obsessed and crazy about something that is really very small? It doesn’t seem like a big thing, but it was. Usually I am able to focus on my breathing during my practice, but I was completely frazzled. Where were my clothes? I clearly remembered choosing the outfit – grey pants and a striped tank – and my hair accoutrements were in the bathroom, where were my clothes? Did I put them in the fridge? Did I put them in the hall cupboard with the towels? Did I throw them in the garbage? Did I lose my mind? DID SOMEONE IN MY HOUSE STEAL MY CLOTHES AND IF SO, WHY.

I’m generally fairly chill about a lot of things but apparently, losing my clothes in my own small house is not one of them. I cannot even describe the weird agitation I was feeling, or the feeling of complete relief and befuddlement when I went into my son’s room a second time to look through his laundry basket and – since the sun was up by this time – discovered the clothes lying on his floor beside the laundry basket. Long, incredibly boring story short, he had showered, gathered up his clothes along with, unwittingly, mine, and went to bed in the dark, dropping his clothes in his basket and my clothes, somehow, on the floor.

I don’t know either.

I kept thinking about the guy I worked with, twenty years ago, who read Who Moved My Cheese and told me it was the worst and stupidest book he had ever read in his life; on that kind of recommendation I have never read it, but whenever something is misplaced I think of him.

Anyway, the hike was fabulous and I had some really good Girl Time with my friends. Janet and Susan are the kind of women who are uplifting, inspiring, and so much fun to be around that I was just buzzing for the rest of the day. The guys had gone camping and when I got home to my empty house, my neighbour shared some vegetarian Greek food he had picked up at the Greek market, which was the cherry on top of a sundae of a day.

Speaking of Girl Time, I have been thinking a lot about female friendship and the various forms it takes. This was instigated from my reading of the Anne books, and particularly this week’s reading of Anne’s House of Dreams (more below). One of the characters, Leslie, is consumed by jealousy over Anne’s seemingly perfect life – Leslie’s life is just terrible and tragic, and their friendship, such as it is, is very much darkened by her feelings of jealousy and unfairness. It made me think a lot about the cultural narrative we have that we should hate women who have something that we do not. Why is this a thing? From Don’t hate me because I’m beautiful to She thinks she’s ALL THAT to my least-favourite line from my favourite movie, What does she look like? Thin, pretty, big tits…your basic nightmare. I mean, Janet has the most beautiful hair you have ever seen in your life – I’m not kidding, it’s long and thick and wavy, and she literally just washes it and goes, IT IS EFFORTLESSLY BEAUTIFUL. If I could somehow transplant her hair onto my head, I would, but instead I just admire it. But this is the point: although I covet her hair I don’t HATE her, quite the opposite, I love her to death. It’s my goal in life to be happy for people who have things that I never will, not just hair, but anything, and to not let jealousy get in the way of friendship or admiration.

In a horrible twist, Anne and Leslie become very good friends, but only after Anne suffers a terrible tragedy: her very much wanted first baby dies one day after birth. At that point, Leslie can see that we are all human and we all suffer, and, incidentally, things end up turning out really well for her in the end.

It’s a good lesson, really, we are all in this life together; jealousy gets us nowhere. The older I get, and the further away from the hectic intensity of parenting younger children, the more I appreciate and value the women in my life. We all have our wonderful gifts, and, to quote L.M. Montgomery, “If you can’t shine like a star, shine like a candlestick.”

Outfit of the Week

Almost every week this summer, I have thought I’d better post a really summery outfit, who knows how long this weather will last! We have had just the loveliest weather, and NO MOSQUITOES, which is unheard of. UNHEARD OF. Therefore, another summery outfit it is!

Yes, another skort from lulu and yes, another tank top from Old Navy, and I will go to my grave saying that Old Navy has the very best fitting tank tops at the very best prices.

Pandemic Reading

The Anne Series – Part Two. As I mentioned last week, I have been rereading the Anne series and I’m going to just put a “spoiler alert” here for anyone who does not want to know what happened in a book written a century ago.

Anne of Windy Poplars. After I finished Anne of the Island, I thought “Yay, House of Dreams is next!” and excitedly ran downstairs to retrieve it, only to discover that the next book was Anne of Windy Poplars. I HAVE read this book before but it made very little impression on me, the only thing I really remembered from it was sad sack Katherine-with-a-K. The book itself is a strange format, and very different from the preceding books: it is almost exclusively made up of letters from Anne, working as a school principal, to Gilbert, who is in medical school. The strangeness of it can be explained by the fact that it was written in 1936, when Island and House of Dreams were written in 1915 and 1917, respectively. Montgomery had a sad life and was battling depression, and was keeping her family financially afloat with her writing, particularly at this time of life.

Anne’s House of Dreams. I love this book; it is the most interesting of the Anne books. It has some very dark storylines and it also introduces three really great characters: Miss Cornelia, Susan, and Leslie. Miss Cornelia is the ultimate “lift up other women” woman, whose catchphrase “Isn’t that just like a man?” I want to adopt for my own. “I’m not hankering after the vote, believe me. I know what it is to clean up after the men.” What a line! Susan is the devoted housekeeper – “Do not worry about the pantry, Mrs. Doctor, dear. Susan is at the helm,” and Leslie is the afore-mentioned beautiful woman who has the most tragic life: married off at 16 to save her mother from losing her home, to a man who is an alcoholic and has probably impregnated and left a “girl from the harbour,” although this is alluded to very circuitously.

The darkest of the storylines, as I mentioned, is that Anne has a baby, and that baby dies. It’s terribly sad and dark, and as an adult it reads so differently: when she has “dreams” (read: is pregnant) again, a “grim shadow” follows her throughout the pregnancy. Ah, my heart wrenched reading that part. Montgomery had three sons, one of whom was stillborn, which makes the story even sadder.

Anne of Ingleside. This is kind of a strange book. I think it is because this was written in 1939, so far after the original series, and even after Rilla of Ingleside, which chronologically comes after Anne of Ingleside. It deals mostly with Anne’s children and their adventures, but it also has some very adult themes as well, like marital issues and problems with in-laws. Gilbert’s aunt, for example, comes to stay for a week and ends up staying almost a year, wreaking havoc on the household, but Gilbert will not tell her to leave. Finally she leaves on her own volition when Anne throws a surprise birthday party for her – she is appalled that everyone knows her advanced age, WHICH IS 55. Welp. There is also a storyline about Anne thinking Gilbert is falling in love with his old flame, but it’s all a miscommunication. Anne thinks the spark is gone, and laments how they take each other for granted and her own aging looks and exhaustion from looking after many small children and DO WE ALL FEEL SEEN BY A CHILDREN’S BOOK FROM THE 1930S OR IS IT JUST ME. “Well, that was life…always change! You had to let the old go and take the new to your heart…learn to love it and then let it go in turn.” Wise words, Anne. She gets the Landslide.

Invincible Summer. Someone recommended this book – who was it? I liked it – didn’t LOVE it, but liked it a lot. It follows four friends after university graduation through the ups and downs of adult life, going from that starry idealism and invincibility of youth to the times where the shit hits the fan. I found this particularly interesting to read as the characters graduate the same year I finished my undergrad, so all of the events were relevant to my own life. A satisfying read, to be sure.

THANK YOU to everyone who asked me questions last week – the answers are coming up soon! In the meantime, let’s enjoy the rest of the summer, and I hope the sun is shining where you are. If it’s not, shine like a candlestick, my friends. xo

Friday the 13th Fun: Ask Me Anything, and Five For Friday

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It has been SO LONG since I’ve spontaneously written a post, and on a Friday to boot! Since the pandemic, I have had very limited blocks of time and physical space in which to write, and it’s all I can do to write weekly recaps and monthly Favourite Things. Do not get me wrong, dear readers, I am here to entertain, but my blog is primarily a journal of my life, and at some point when this pandemic is no longer at the disco, I will want to look back at the weekly recaps to see where we were at during different time periods.

However! The stars have aligned and I have some time and space to write, so write I shall.

Ask Me Anything

I was inspired by my friend Suz (HI SUZ) to open up this space a little by asking you to Ask Me Anything. Ask me a question and the answer will be the subject of an upcoming blog! IS there anything you don’t know and want to know? I’ve been blogging since 2008 and I’m not too shy with details, so hopefully there is a stone or two left unturned.

Five For Friday

I was also inspired by Stephany (HI STEPHANY) to write a “Five For Friday” post. Fun fact: both Stephany and Suz live in Florida, which is about as far away from me as one can get before leaving the continent. Don’t you just love the virtual world, how we can be essentially pen pals with people from all over?

1) It looks like I will be teaching four yoga classes a week, in person, starting in September. I am very mixed about it, given the current “fourth wave” of Covid cases, but also I cannot bear the thought of teaching online anymore. I know several friends who have thrived as online yoga teachers, but I frankly find it stressful and exhausting, especially for my seniors. My very favourite thing about teaching yoga is seeing my students and having that connection with them (cue The Bachelor music) and so teaching online has been very difficult emotionally for me. And yet, with Covid cases surging once again, well…I feel like I am at a crossroads, to be honest. We shall see how it goes. If I’ve learned anything over the past *checks blog* seventy-three weeks, it’s that nothing is forever and changes can always be made and I am much more adaptable than I think I am.

2) I have discovered that I am an Extroverted Introvert. I desperately need time by myself to recharge; hence my early morning rising, my affinity for solo exercise, and all the time I spend reading, but at the same time, I love people. I love being around people, and on that note, we are having dinner guests this weekend for the first time since February 2020. I’m excited, not only to see this lovely couple, but also because two of the dishes I’m making feature vegetables from my garden; specifically kale and zucchini. You guys, I have so much zucchini. I think zucchini is the most satisfying thing to grow, other than leaf lettuce, as it is so prolific.

3) Every day I feel gratitude to the universe that I do not have a nut allergy. Nuts comprise a huge part of my diet, but I am starting to move away from almond milk. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still eating almonds and almond butter, but I feel like my past consumption of almond milk is somewhat environmentally disastrous. I’ve started using macadamia nut milk in my smoothies – is it better than almond? I hope so. – and you guys, it is revolutionary. It’s so rich and creamy, with a really delicious flavour, and it has the same amount of calcium as almond milk, which is what attracted me to almond milk in the first place.

4) Speaking of calcium, I have been reading a lot about osteoporosis and menopause, and the importance of a strength routine for healthy bone density. To that end, my sons created an upper body strength routine for me and good lord, do I hate it. I mean, I’m DOING it, and maybe I’ll grow to like it, but I find strength training so very boring. I listen to upbeat music while “lifting” (can you call it “lifting” if you use five pound weights?) and that helps somewhat. It feels like a chore; any suggestions to make strength training more interesting, I’m all ears.

Meep meep! I’m a big weight!

5) My aunt sent me some royal family memorabilia, and I’m thrilled. After some thought and a poll on Instagram, I have decided that I am going to USE the mugs, maybe not every day, but I’m not going to just put them in a cupboard. Can we all agree that we should use the good things, the things that make us happy, every day? I don’t want to be like one of those old ladies who keeps the furniture covered with plastic or the table covered with a wipeable tablecloth just to “save it.” Imagine going through your whole life and dying, having never drank coffee out of your Queen Elizabeth mug. That feels tragic.

Happy Friday, everyone! I’ll be enjoying this immensely beautiful weather with a few backyard cocktails today while watching my zucchini grow. Don’t forget – ask me anything! And tell me: do you use the Good Stuff? xo

Vacation, Mostly; Seventy-One and Seventy-Two Weeks In

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Hi!

On Saturday we returned from almost two weeks away, staying in our vacation house, spending time with family and friends. It had been almost ten months since my mother-in-law had seen her only grandchildren, so it was really lovely.

It was a pretty busy two weeks, as we are doing an extensive addition and renovation to our place, which meant that every morning we had an appointment with a tradesperson or a big reno-related errand to run. Well, I say “we” but mostly it was my husband meeting with our contractor and various tradespeople, whereas I was more the “celebrity shopper” brought in for final decisions. This was both fun and also at times incredibly tedious. One morning we spent over two hours at the tile store, choosing six different but coordinating tiles for the bathrooms, and by the end of it I felt like this:

But afternoons were spent at my SIL’s pool or the beach, and it was just wonderful. We had clear blue skies until about four days before we left, when the forest fire smoke blew in to stay.

I have not yet felt comfortable with eating in restaurants, and I am glad I followed my instincts because while we were there, there were several restaurants closed due to Covid outbreaks and, in fact, a mask mandate was re-instituted for that area. I had talked to a friend the night before the mask mandate, and expressed wonder at the maskless-ness of the area. I had gone to the grocery store a few times by that point and had been one of only a handful of people wearing masks, and that includes the grocery store staff. It was almost like there was no pandemic at all, and I felt a bit like I had landed on some other planet.

Therefore, I was kind of happy to see the new mask mandate; I felt the response to a spike in cases was appropriate and incredibly responsible and made me feel even more sad about my home province’s weird and unprecedented announcement that as of later this month, isolation will not be required for individuals testing positive for Covid. It will be “recommended,” but not required, which, what. The province has said that they are planning to treat Covid just like any other respiratory virus, which, what. Anyway, the whole idea has left me filled with fear, despair, and impotent rage.

I cannot control other’s behaviour, I cannot control the decisions of those in authority, I can only control my own behaviour and decisions, and on that note, I think I may indulge in a little retail therapy and buy a few kicky new masks. I am keeping my own mask mandate, let me tell you.

That’s enough of that depressing information, let’s get back to vacation! I do love having access to a full kitchen on vacation, even in non-pandemic-at-the-disco times, as I don’t really love eating out that much. I mean, I can’t really remember. The last time I ate inside an actual restaurant was early February 2020, and I ate lunch on a patio last August. But I think I don’t love eating out that much? Anyway, the only problem with eating all our meals at home was that I was still meal planning, grocery shopping, and cooking while on vacation, which made me feel a tiny bit like this:

My husband grilled a lot of the time, which helped immensely, but of course one cannot live on grilled items alone, so when he grilled I inevitably prepared salads and side dishes, which is how it goes.

All of which is to say it was a great two weeks, and after 36 hours at home I finally feel unpacked and caught up on everything – how is there so much laundry, I did laundry almost daily on vacation – and it’s back to reality, albeit Summer Reality. My garden has been productive in my absence, although in need of weeding, and so it’s back to my super-expensive salads! I even had a tiny cherry tomato ripen, and I can tell you, that tomato was goddamn delicious.

Outfits of the Week(s)

“How many bathing suits do you HAVE, and are they all black?” my sister-in-law asked me one afternoon. The answers are “a lot” and “yes, essentially.” I like to buy bathing suits when they are on mix and match end-of-season sale, and since they get very little wear – I wear each one maybe a couple of times a year, since the boys are too old for me to take them to the pool anymore – they don’t wear out. Therefore, the outfits of the week are my three favourite bathing suits and my very favourite beach cover-up.

I have many beach coverups, but this is my number one favourite. It has pockets! It also can almost pass as regular clothing.

I bought this cute embroidered suit when one-shoulder suits were going out of style, I think I paid about $30 for both pieces. I love it so much.

This suit is one of those “cute for sitting around the pool, not great for actual swimming” suits. Those sandals are new, from the end-of-season (in July? What the what.) sale at Skechers, and they are so comfortable, they are like walking on clouds.

As my friend Sara (HI SARA) says, if you see a tree on a beach and you don’t immediately pop into tree pose, can you even call yourself a yoga teacher? I love polka dots and rarely get a chance to wear them.

All suits and the coverup are from La Vie En Rose, and if you’re in Canada I really recommend them for quality swimwear – check them out this month as they are sure to have some great sales!

Pandemic Reading, Vacation Edition

I read a ton of books on vacation, so many that I will make my reading list into a separate post. I have some great titles to recommend and one controversial opinion.

I hope you all had a brilliant end to your July – omg, it is August already – and I hope you too can enjoy some downtime! xo

Face Facts; Seventy Weeks In

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I was hiking with the boys and, as I always do, I greeted a pair of women we passed on the path. We exchanged some pleasantries about the day and the steepness of the hike – we hiked Prairie Mountain, it is straight up and straight down, with zero gentle switchbacks – and then we carried on our way. I heard the women speaking rapidly in French behind us, like they were discussing something, and, later when we were taking a break, they went to pass us. They paused for a moment, and then one of the women approached me and said, “This is a very strange question, maybe, but are you an economist?”

I said yes, and then we looked at each other for a moment. It took a beat but then I recognized her from my time at the Economics Society, back in the Nineties; she was a prominent member at that time, and I was still a grad student. It had been twenty-five years since we had seen each other, and I expressed my astonishment not only that we should run into each other on a hiking trail on a random Monday morning in July, but also that she recognized me after all this time. She said, “Well, of course I did, you look exactly the same!”

I used to think this kind of statement, while very kind, generous, and well-meaning, is an objectively wrong one, but I think I am at a point in my life where I understand it. Objectively, I do not look exactly the same as I did in 1996, nor does anyone else. Twenty-five years of living changes a person physically, obviously. However, the essence of a person can be unchanged over that time period; after all, I recognized this woman immediately as well, and she would have been younger than I am now when I last saw her. It’s not unlike when you see a childhood group photo and you can instantly recognize your friends; no one looks the same as they did when they were a child, but their essence is still there.

My mother-in-law once said to me that she never really sees me as aging; to her, I just look like the same Nicole she’s always known, and I understand what that means. I see my friends and loved ones in the same way; maybe there are a few more lines or changes, but essentially, I just see the same people I know and love. It’s more than just physical, even if the last time I saw a person was in high school, I can still immediately see the person I knew then, shining through now. I never think Jesus, maybe some eye cream? I just think Yay, there’s my beautiful friend. All of which goes to show that we never really see ourselves as others see us, we are our own worst critics, and if we could treat ourselves the way we treat our friends, the world would be an infinitely better place.

Speaking of which. Lately I have had a disproportionately large number of friends and acquaintances on social media show their before and after photos, the before and after referring to Botox and dermal fillers. I am going to tell you this: they all, without exception, look fantastic. It’s quite incredible; they look like the same people, but smoother and fresher. They don’t look weird or fake in any way, they look like they have applied an Instagram filter, but in real life.

I try not to compare myself to others, but I found myself comparing my own face – which is, in repose, bitchy-looking at best, haggard and Crypt Keeper-like at worst – to their smooth and fresh faces. I am generally a confident person with healthy self-esteem, but I was kind of feeling bad about myself. This feeling was not unlike the one I get when I look at Instagram photos of women my age, but don’t realize that they are filtered, and I end up wondering how I got to looking like the Crypt Keeper when everyone else looks young and lovely.

It’s hard to explain the opposing forces in my brain. I am, as you all know, Pro-Aging, but I am also not made of stone, people. I took some time to do a little research and I discovered that my old dermatologist – who I went to for acne issues, hello Circle of Life – performs these sorts of procedures. I kept reading and realized that one of the contraindications to getting Botox and dermal fillers is skin that scars easily and, since I still have tiny little scars all over my legs from varicose vein stripping over a decade ago – complete with dots from where the stitches went in – I closed my browser and closed my mind to it.

It’s for the best, really. Isn’t it funny how these things work? Some of the most beautiful women I have ever met are the septuagenarian and octogenarian ladies in my seniors’ yoga class; they truly have the faces they deserve, as the saying goes, with their inner beauty shining through. And although I’d love to look more rested – my eyebags are sometimes steamer trunks – and less crinkly, well, this is the face I have and, ultimately, the face I deserve. I raise my eyebrows a lot, I smile a lot, I make that “Kermit the Frog scrunch face” a lot, and my face reflects that. I’m going to be at peace with it and also, keep up with the retinol creams. Jesus, maybe some eye cream?

Outfit of the Week

This is probably my very favourite summer outfit of all time. I feel so cute in it, it makes me want to twirl around like a ballerina, or like my seven-year-old niece. I COULD do that without fear of traumatizing anyone, as it is a skort, albeit kind of a short one. I paired it with a yoga tank because even though I now have comfortable bras, I still like a shelf-bra tank on hot days. Sandals are Skechers, naturally.

It’s not every day my accessories match my outfit this perfectly! That bracelet was made by my friend Amy (HI AMY)!

Pandemic Reading

A Thousand Ships. In my very first semester at university, I took an introduction to classical studies, and our required reading was The Iliad, The Odyssey, and a few other Greek plays. It is very telling that I have never read them since, and, in fact, I couldn’t remember anything about them. I think I blocked them out. I have extremely low interest in men’s stories: I could not care less about mighty warriors and their conquests, and I definitely don’t want to read about all the capturing, enslaving, and raping said conquests. However, I was intrigued by this book which explores the Trojan war through the eyes of the women. I did not love this book, but I did like the different point of view, and I did like to see women portrayed as something other than crazy, long-suffering, and vain.

When No One Is Watching. This book is marketed as a psychological thriller, but it doesn’t really read as one – at least for the first two-thirds of the book. It is more of an educational exploration of the practice of redlining and the dark, sad side of gentrification, with thrilling dramatic license. I liked this a lot as it is very mind-opening, and the end is thrilling and satisfying, but it’s not what I consider to be a typical thriller. Still, very much worth the read.

A Burning. Oh, this was so so good. I picked this up on the advice of Suzanne (HI SUZANNE) and it did not disappoint. It follows the story of a woman who is accused of aiding and abetting a terrorist act in India, through the points of view of three very different people, all of whom are trying to rise up in the world. It is an absolutely chilling portrait of what people will do to make their way up the ladder, so to speak. I love books that have a realistic description of different places and cultures, and this book describes India – its economics, culture, cities and villages – so well.

I hope you are all enjoying the summer; we are doing our best to make it A Summer, after the disappointments of last year. Have fun, be kind – especially to yourself. xo