Category Archives: Empty Nest Travel

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The South African Safari Edition

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I’ve been home for twelve days now, and my trip to South Africa already feels like a dream. It was a dream! Every little thing was perfect. When we arrived at the Johannesburg airport, the gentleman who was escorting us to the tiny airport that housed all the little bush planes said to me hopefully it won’t be the last, when I said it was our first time to South Africa. From your lips, sir, to god’s ear.

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The South African Safari Edition

Oh, I’m Driving My Life Away

We were in three different parts of South Africa, and each place was quite different in terms of landscape and animal populations, and we booked with a company called And Beyond. The woman who arranged all our transportation and accommodations is called Tonya Siebert, and she was fantastic. I highly, highly recommend them. Game drives happened twice daily, and each drive was between three and four hours long. A friend asked if I was ever bored, and the honest answer is no. I don’t think I COULD get bored, because there was always something new and different to look at. It was incredible to see animals up close, just living their lives and doing their thing, not caring one bit about the car full of people taking their photo.

This giraffe was so close to our car that I was holding my breath until it walked away, at which point I relaxed enough to take a photo. One woman in our group said “Was anyone else nervous? That giraffe looked right into all of our SOULS.”
Lion, doing her best Rex impression.
Posing for an African safari catalogue.
Where do you think you’re going? We OWN this road.

On our very first game drive, right after we saw these lions, our guide stopped the car and suggested we get out to stretch our legs and have a drink. I assumed he was just reminding us to hydrate, so I opened the glass bottle of water they had given me, and started to chug. Then I saw what they were setting up.

It was a full bar with snacks. A FULL BAR WITH SNACKS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BUSH. This happened on each drive; in the morning they would serve coffee, tea, or an absolutely delectable beverage called Mochachocolottamarula, which is basically coffee with hot chocolate mix and a delicious liqueur called Amarula. I had one every single morning and I plan to make this a part of my Christmas holiday celebrations.

This brings me to my next point.

Food, Glorious Food

I had nothing but amazing food for the entire time that we were there. The travel company had sent us a lot of paperwork to fill out, and one part of it involved food preferences. For each meal, I was given a special menu that had my name on it and every single thing was incredibly delicious and was similar to the regular menu my husband was given, that did NOT have his name on it. For example, if he was offered steak, I was offered a cauliflower “steak,” if he was offered a pasta dish mine would not involve meat. The food was so fresh and flavourful, and I have to mention the avocados, which were the best avocados I have had in my life! Every day my menu was different, varied, and universally delicious.

I was also introduced to the South African Pinotage, a wonderful red wine, and enjoyed my favourite Aperol spritzes as well. Also, when they made a gin and tonic, they made a gin and tonic.

One thing I loved about the lodges is that they were equipped with a water filtration system, so drinking water is simply served in glass bottles. There was no plastic and no waste. Any food scraps were sent to local pig farms, and grey water was used for irrigation.

Is This The Real Life?

The accommodations were stunning as well at each of the lodges. Kirkman’s Kamp, in the Sabi Sands, was probably the most convivial; it was quite small, so we got to know all the other travellers, and there was a bar that everyone would go to post-game-drive-pre-dinner, which made for a very fun atmosphere.

Ngala Safari Lodge was gorgeous, and featured a swimming pool that elephants would come to drink out of every once in a while. This happened while we were there but we missed it; later that night we heard the elephants making a lot of noise, and hyenas screaming. I don’t know what happened, but this is why guests are not allowed to walk by themselves after dark.

The most interesting and luxurious accommodations of all were in Phinda Forest Lodge. Each room was a separate structure in the sand forest, and each structure was built around the trees, literally.

Our deck.
The main eating area.

People Who Like People

Each safari vehicle was equipped for six guests, and I did wonder what the others would be like. It’s always a bit of an unknown when you join a group, and I always hope for the best. I am happy to report that all of our safari-mates at each of the three lodges – eleven other people in all, from all over the world – were all incredible and I am so happy we met them and spent so much time together.

Every second night each lodge would host a boma dinner, which takes place in an enclosed, open air area, and involves a family-style buffet dinner. Each safari group, along with the guide, would be seated at one table, and there was often traditional singing and dancing around the firepit. Of course I loved that, but as a people person, I also loved eating dinner with a big group and learning everyone’s stories. I am a person who wants to know the story of your life, even if it doesn’t get us out of Chicago.

A special evening drinks break, on the last night with our new and fabulous friends from NYC. I suspect we got extra special treatment because we were with them, and I’ll take it!
The special drinks table was set up right beside a hippo pond, and anyone who has known me for a long time will know why hippos are so special to me.

Fuck The Patriarchy

I love all the animals, and I especially loved learning about their habits and lives. But there was something VERY UPSETTING about the fact that all the female lions hunt and the male lions have first dibs on all the food; the females eat only after the males are done. Female rhinos are always trying to dissuade the males from mating with them if they already have babies, because if they get pregnant too soon the babies will die. It just feels like the world over, males are dominating females and making them weaker, see also the excess of valium prescriptions during the women’s revolution and the emphasis on thinness from the time women got the vote.

YES I AM PROJECTING MY FEELINGS ONTO THE ANIMAL KINGDOM.

My favourite animal is, as I have mentioned before, the elephant. Elephants are matriarchies, but that’s not the only reason I love them. They are such intelligent, incredible animals. The female-led group all help each other raise babies, they support each other, and they rally around each other and their offspring in case of danger. Let us all be elephants!

Plus, baby elephants are the cutest thing I have ever seen. They practice threatening behaviour by flapping their ears out wide, which made us all go awwwww, he’s threatening us. They have to learn to use their trunks, so we watched them dip them wildly in the water.

We also learned that hyenas are a matriarchy. We watched them at their den, and the little cubs were so cute and fun to watch. I used binoculars to get a really close look at them and was absolutely alarmed to see the junk on the baby male. I actually thought it was a fifth leg. It turns out that hyenas have a very high concentration of testosterone, so that even female genitals are, shall we say, elongated. Listen, I’m not drawing any parallels or jumping to conclusions, all I am saying is that it’s a sight to be seen. Or not, depending on your interest in animal genitalia.

Outfit of the Month

Imagine my minor distress on finding out that black clothing is discouraged on safari; I have been diligently shopping my closet for the past several months, but I had to face facts. I needed some new clothes. I have become a big fan of Solbari sun protective clothing, a company out of Australia. If anyone knows about sun protection, it’s the Australians. I purchased a couple of long-sleeved tops in creamy beige and moss green, as well as a long-sleeve light beige button-up top from Lululemon. I wore the long-sleeve tops with my beige Lululemon Dance Studio Crops or my newly-purchased dark green Daydrift pants. Light, loose, comfortable clothing – with elastic waists! – was the order of the day, when you are spending six to eight hours a day in a safari vehicle.

I also wore cute Skechers walking shoes, which have now seen me through Morocco, London, and South Africa. May they travel to more destinations in the future!

I can hardly believe June is almost done, friends. How was your month? Tell me everything. Even if it won’t get us out of Chicago. xo

I’ve Been To London To Look At The Queen

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And by Queen, I mean the much-loved late QEII, in deference to my much-loved late Grandma Fern, who hated Camilla Parker-Bowles with the fire of a thousand suns.

Not That Kind of Weed

I am happy to report that, after seven solid mornings of work, I have finally got the weed situation under control. In the berry patch and veggie garden, it looked as though someone had planted a thick groundcover throughout. After my first hour of weeding that area, I looked up and felt a sinking despair, with a mere three square feet cleared and so much left to go. However, as my former boss used to say when we had a financial position he wanted to reverse, I just chipped away at it and here we are.

Who’s Eating Off The Floors Anyway

The hardest thing about travelling is leaving Rex behind, it’s true, but it’s also true that Rex is JUST FINE. He’s better than fine, actually, because he boards at a kennel that is known as the Country Club for Pets at which he a) has his own “suite” for sleeping and eating, b) has playtime with other dogs, and c) is known and loved. There are young people whose entire job it is to play with and cuddle the dogs, and one of them runs the Instagram account, so I was able to check in daily to see the big galoompa bounding around, wagging and barking. He always jumps into the car enthusiastically when I ask him if he wants to see his friends, and then he jumps into the car enthusiastically when I pick him up. He’s basically enthusiastic about everything.

Everything, except water. Unfortunately, due to a plethora of dogs and Sunday staffing, the kennel was unable to bathe him before I picked him up. No problem, I thought. He needs a cut anyway. I called the groomer only to find out that his girlfriend was on vacation, and will not be able to take him until this coming Thursday. Let’s just say that Rex is very, very dirty, and leave it at that. Things are not improved by his love of rolling in dead dry grass, and because his fur is just generally filthy, brushing out the grass only lodges it in further. Basically, he spends the day shedding things all over the house. I can feel little…somethings in his fur, said a gentleman I speak to daily on the walking path, as he petted Rex. Clouds of dust rose from Rex’s off-black body, like that of Pigpen’s from Peanuts. Those are grass seeds, I replied grimly.

My sister-in-law, unaware of Rex’s absolute fear and loathing of water, suggested I put him in one of our walk-in showers, just to get some grime off. I immediately pictured a terrified and traumatized Rex bursting, Kool-Aid Man-style through the shower door, leaving a Rex-shaped hole and shattered glass in his wake.

Well, it’s a small price to pay for his happiness, and in the meantime I am vacuuming a lot. Pristine floors are overrated anyway.

The Royal We

Weeding backlogs and a filthy dog are worth it to be able to travel to places I’ve always dreamed about. One of my clearest early memories is from the summer that I was six, and was staying with my grandparents: Grandma Fern woke me up at 2:30 am so we could watch the Royal Wedding together. I remember watching Diana getting out of the car absolutely ensconced in silk, and that gigantic dress and train seemed to me the absolute height of beauty. Nothing could have been more gorgeous. Nothing could have been more special than being awake while everyone else slept, just me and Grandma Fern. Thirty years later, I got up at 2:30 in the morning for another Royal Wedding watch with my Anglophile friend Julie (HI JULIE), who provided tea and scones with clotted cream. The moment I got home I phoned Grandma Fern, and we spent a lot of time dissecting the details, including whether the aforementioned Camilla Parker-Bowles should have been INVITED to her stepson’s wedding. She is NOT his stepmother, do not say that, do not ever say that! She’s nothing but a home-wrecker, Grandma said sternly. Grandma Fern was not interested in the expectations of the era and time healing wounds and the heart wanting what the heart wants. I changed the subject to Kate’s sleeves.

Ever since that day in July 1981, I have been interested in the British Royal Family in general, and Diana in particular. My interest may have bordered on obsession; I still have all my scrapbooks, special edition People magazines, and the myriad coffee table books featuring Diana, the Radiant Princess that I would receive as Christmas gifts. I have not one but two paper doll books of Diana and her clothing, one to cut out and one to keep, and let me tell you, that wedding dress was a bitch to cut out. I am rarely, if ever, affected by celebrity deaths but I was devastated by Diana’s. I avidly watched The Crown up until Season Four, and then shut it off, never to return, because I could not handle reliving the crash, fictionalized or not.

It felt surreal to be in places I had watched and read about. I teared up when I saw Buckingham Palace, thinking how much Grandma Fern would have loved seeing it.

I share a birthday with the late Queen Elizabeth, and to see Westminster Abbey, where she and all the other British monarchs were coronated, was incredible. It is impossible to thoroughly tour everything in London in only five days, but this was on my must-visit list. My husband booked us tickets, and we spent a few hours audio-touring and being amazed.

I did not realize how many burial vaults are in Westminster Abbey, not only of monarchs but also notable scientists, politicians, and writers. There are over 3300 people buried there! Jane Austen is not one of them, but she has a memorial stone in Poet’s Corner.

Another place I wanted an in-depth tour was the Tower of London. I love these kinds of historical buildings and as we went through the rooms, I imagined what it would be like to live or be imprisoned there.

The Tower also is the home of the Crown Jewels, and we were able to see them as well as the changing of the guard in front of the building. It felt incredible to be there, like I was a tiny part of history.

My husband had planned a secret afternoon post-Tower touring, and that included a rooftop flower garden and a walk to a tiny church, St Dunstan, a medieval structure in the middle of city streets. I love a medieval structure!

One of the biggest highlights was seeing Hamilton at the Victoria Theatre, which was a three-minute walk from our hotel. Hamilton is my favourite musical, followed only by Evita and The Phantom of the Opera, so I was VERY excited. It did not disappoint! For those of you who remember my 2020 obsession with the soundtrack, you will know how moved I was for the entire time, and how I sobbed when it was quiet uptown.

London! What a fabulous city, I cannot believe I was THERE. I looked at the Rosetta Stone! With my own eyes! And you can bet that I said Look kids, Big Ben! Parliament, approximately one million times over our five-day visit. Mostly in my head, to the benefit of my marriage.

Weekly Reading

I will share my vacation reads in a separate post (spoiler alert: I had a LOT of DNF’s), but let me tell you about this incredible week of reading: two of my favourite must-own authors had new books out, David Sedaris and Ann Patchett. Since the Sedaris came out a month after my birthday, and months before Christmas, I pre-ordered it. I didn’t even know that Patchett had a new book coming out until it was already released, and when I discovered this fact I jumped up from the table where I was having pre-game drive coffee and scurried over to where our safari-mates, a delightful couple from NYC, were seated. The night before, the woman and I had bonded over our shared love for Patchett, Elizabeth Strout, and my Fuck the Patriarchy lipstick case. I think I had jazz-hands as I told her that there was a NEW ANN PATCHETT OMG and of course I bought it when I went to pick up my preordered Sedaris after arriving home.

All of which is to say that it has been a five-star reading week!

The Land and Its People. I will say I had a tiny bit of trepidation because Happy-Go-Lucky, Sedaris’ last collection, left me upset and depressed. If you know, you know. However, The Land and Its People affected me in the same way Calypso did – I found myself laughing until I cried. A few of the essays about his parents are heartbreaking, but mostly I was literally guffawing the whole way through. GUFFAWING. I also – as with Calypso – found myself feeling seen, as he talked about DuoLingo, getting his steps in, and going on safari in Africa. This was absolutely wonderful and hilarious and felt like a breath of wry fresh air.

Whistler. Ann Patchett can do no wrong in my view, and this glorious new release is no exception. Oh! I loved it so much. It’s the story of a woman who encounters the man who was briefly her stepfather, after over four decades of absence. It’s about secrets and family, friendship and love, trauma and healing. All the characters are so rich, and the story is just so beautiful, made even more poignant as the stepfather was based on her late, dear friend Jim Fox, and that there are three fathers featured in the book, which Patchett famously has written about having. The main character and her sister are around my age, and there was so much that resonated so deeply, from aging parents and cleaning out houses to the claim that “old men love me.” Girl, same. It’s just a breathtakingly beautiful book and the ending left me staring into space for many minutes. It’s just so hopeful and gorgeous, with a message that people are good and decent, despite how things sometimes feel.

The thing about going away when we did is that when we left, it was spring, and now it is full-on summer! I have to keep reminding myself of the day and month. It’s the last full week of June already! It looks to be a beautiful one here in the Okanagan valley, and I hope it’s beautiful where you are. xo

Five For Friday: The Packing List Edition

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What I Packed. As always, my husband and I took carryon luggage only for our almost-three-week trip to London and South Africa. I also had a large shoulder bag in which I stashed my smaller crossbody bag, and he took a backpack. Everywhere we went, the luggage porter would look at us and say That’s it? That’s all you have? Yes! I like not hauling large suitcases around, which is good, as it would have been really impractical for taking the Tube in London, what with all the stairs and escalators. I feel footloose and fancy-free, zipping around with only a small carryon. I like not having to wait at baggage claim, and I especially like not having a massive case of anxiety about lost luggage. I am not an anxious person generally, but as soon as my bag is out of sight I assume someone has lost it, or it is somehow being destroyed and I will never see my clothing and curling iron again. So carryon works for us in all respects.

Clothing-wise, including what I wore on the plane, I took three pairs of pants (moss green, beige, black), three black tanks, three black tees, and three long-sleeved UV protectant shirts in cream and moss green. I also packed two long floaty skirts, a bathing suit and cover up, a hat, shortie pajamas, two light scarves, socks, and underwear. I took one nice top to pair with the black pants for the theatre, where we saw a performance of Hamilton. For footwear, I wore cute Skechers walking shoes and I packed a pair of sandals. Also, because I’m the hottest bitch in this place, bringing sexy back, etcetera, I wore my beige, full-length, medical grade compression hose on the plane and packed two pairs of compression calf sleeves. We used the complimentary laundry service that each of the lodges offered, and I also did some sink laundry while we were in London.

Enjoying a glass of wine before Hamilton, in my one nice top. Look around, look around, how lucky we are to be alive right now.

What I Overpacked. As always, I packed way, way, way more underwear and socks than I could possibly use. I am okay with that, though, and I will not change my ways. What if for some reason I COULDN’T do laundry? THEN WHAT? I’m not going to wear unwashed panties or socks, thank you very much. I also took far too much sunscreen: two sunscreen sticks, face serum sunscreen, and two 60 mL tubes of Neutrogena sheer. As it turned out, I could have made do with only my face serum sunscreen, as I wore my long-sleeve tops on all the safaris, and I found that the bottle was more than enough for the few times I needed to lube up my shoulders and arms in London.

A few people spoke to me fearfully about malaria, but June is a very low risk season in South Africa. Still, I packed two small bottles of some kind of hippie insect repellant, and didn’t use any because a) it was too cold at night for mosquitoes to live, and b) even if it was mosquito season, each lodge provided an enormous bottle of bug spray in each room which would probably have worked much better than the plant-based essential oil woowoo I brought. In retrospect, I would have brought none at all and saved the space in my little liquids bag.

Leopard, totally relaxed in the long grass beside our vehicle, unbothered by mosquitoes or us.

What I Didn’t Use. It has to be pretty hot before I will submerge myself in an unheated swimming pool, and the temperatures never got above 26 C, so my bathing suit and cover up went unused. I also rarely wore my hat, not because it wasn’t sunny – it was! – but because the safari vehicles can move pretty fast and even with the chin strap the hat wasn’t comfortable to wear, what with the broad brim flapping around. I don’t regret taking them though; I like the option for both swimming and hat-wearing.

I also didn’t use my light scarves; it was too hot in London, and it was too casual on safari to wear them. Neither scarf takes up much room so it isn’t much of a regret on this front either.

I wore my scarf one day and then within thirty minutes tied it to the strap of my bag because I was sweating, as they say, like a New York waiter.

What I Should Have Packed. For years I had a 35-40 day menstrual cycle, followed by years of a 21-25 day cycle. In the last six months, it has stretched out again, and my last period before our trip was a 52 day cycle, which started only two weeks before we left. I’m in the clear! I thought happily, but then, wary of my own cheerful prediction, I added a few pantyliners to my toiletries case.

I was right to be wary. The very first day in London, I got my period – surprise! – which was lucky, since there are Boots pharmacies everywhere you turn. If that had happened in the middle of the bush, I would have been fucked. I mean, not literally, since I had my period, and I’m old-fashioned that way. But I did think of the scenario in which I would be free-bleeding in the wild, attracting predators and the hatred of my fellow safari-goers.

The moral of the story? If you have a uterus, even if you think that uterus is closing up shop, PACK PERIOD SUPPLIES.

Is there a Boots around this corner? MAYBE.

The Unexpected Star of the Show. The importance of wearing neutral safari colours – dark or moss greens, shades of beige and khaki – were drilled into us before we left Canada. No bright colours! Avoid black! For the love of god, no animal prints! In one of the lodges I did see a woman in leopard print pants who also had a small baby in a front-carrier with a pink and blue blanket, and again, I am not generally an anxious person BUT COME ON. Anyway. I unearthed a rarely worn dark green fleece jacket, which features a windproof vest and hood, from my closet. This was a pandemic purchase and one I have frequently regretted. The jacket was impractical for cold, windy Calgary walks, and it is too warm for Kelowna walks. I hate wearing layers that have hoods, and I kind of hated the colour as well. Why I didn’t donate it years ago, I have no idea.

I’m glad I didn’t, because it was absolutely perfect for safari! It was a nice layer to have on cold morning and evening drives, and the colour was more than acceptable. I shall NEVER donate it, in case I ever get the opportunity to go on safari again.

The star of the show, my fleece jacket. Also starring a female lion practicing pandemic protocol, keeping six feet away.

Happy Friday, friends! xo

Out of (South) Africa

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Fly High Free Bird

On Saturday night at about 8:30, my husband and I arrived home from South Africa after a solid forty-five hours in transit, which included five flights, a jeep ride to an airstrip in Phinda forest, an epic seven hour stopover in London Heathrow, and, less dramatic but very nice, a half-hour drive from the airport in my older son’s Toyota. All that travel sounds more onerous than it really was, as we had lie-flat seats for the long-haul flights – eleven hours from Johannesburg to London, and nine and a half from London to Vancouver – and also fancy lounge access at all airports, which included, thankfully, showers.

Still, that is a lot of travel and when we got home I hugged my sons, unpacked my suitcase, showered, and fell into bed. I woke up Sunday feeling…fine? I feel like it’s a jinx to say I’m totally back to normal life, un-jetlagged, but I think I’m back to normal life. It feels strange to think that a week ago I was on safari, and now I’m back to thinking about the garden, thinking about the weekly meals, thinking about catching up with friends, thinking about exercise and dog walks and everything that makes up my daily world.

London Calling

The journey to South Africa was much less exhausting than the journey home, because we stopped off in London for five nights. London! What an incredible city. It was a wonderful experience to actually be in places that I have only read about for my entire life. I felt quite emotional, just being there. We were there for a heat wave, which was fantastic. We didn’t have a drop of rain, which meant that the city was alive with people, walking through the parks and spilling out of pubs, enjoying the sunshine and heat.

In addition to all the Big Sights of London, my husband created an itinerary in which I would be constantly surprised and delighted. I am, if you recall, the vacation GOER, while my husband is the vacation PLANNER. So while I knew the big-ticket sights we would be seeing, there were plenty of surprises he had planned for me. Like this:

The mothership is calling me home! I didn’t go to any classes, because they are all in the evening and the wait lists are a mile long, but it was a thrill just to be there.

After Peloton, we went to the Devonshire for the “best Guinness in London,” and then to Waterstones.

I have much, much more to say about London, but that will have to wait for another day. I did have a Very Exciting Encounter, though:

Elisabeth! She and I had a one-day overlap in London, so I was lucky enough to meet up with her and her husband at a pub. YOU GUYS. Her beautiful soul just beams out of her beautiful face. I could have talked to her for three days straight, but alas, we both had places to be and things to do. (HI ELISABETH)

This Time For Africa

Something I did not expect for our trip was the type of plane we would be flying on once we were in South Africa. We flew on a double-decker AirBus from London to Johannesburg, and I knew that we would be taking smaller, regional flights once we landed. When I heard “smaller, regional flights” I assumed that the aircraft would be a regular prop plane or something similar, with actual airports. I did not expect to be boarding an eight-passenger bush plane and to be landing on a tiny airstrip in the middle of the bush, an area patrolled by safari jeeps to ensure no large animals would be in the way when the planes flew in. It was quite the experience! We took six such flights, and it was so much fun. The roads, I gather, are not great and the routes to different safari lodges are long and indirect, so flying in was fabulous.

I also assumed we would be seeing animals from afar, using binoculars and just hoping for glances. What I did not realize was that we would be off-roading through the bush, and that we would be so close to wild animals. Honestly, those animals could not care less about safari vehicles, and of course the guides were knowledgeable about giving the animals the space that they require.

I got a feel for things on our first game drive, when a group of four male lions just casually walked by our vehicle and then calmly laid down in the road. If I reached out my arm, I could have touched them, that is how close they were. That first night we also saw African wild dogs, which is a rare sighting, hyenas, and giraffes.

Every lodge had rules that guests could not walk around by themselves after dark, because animals saunter in and out at their leisure. I didn’t feel overly concerned about this until our last lodge, in Phinda, where there are baboons and monkeys everywhere. Baboons are the most terrifying animal and I was petrified whenever I saw one.

It was also unnerving to be charged by a male rhino in the Sabi Sands. Fortunately we were on a straightaway road, and our guide just floored the gas to zoom away. All other rhinos we saw were pretty relaxed, although we did come across a group of mamas with babies, and it was incredible to see how they circled around the young ones protectively.

In each safari group, there is a tracker and a guide. When it comes to the big cats, the tracker – as the name would suggest – looks for tracks and other signs in order to find them. We saw several every day; lions, including cubs, leopards, and cheetahs. Different reserves have different concentrations of animals, depending on the landscape, and in Phinda forest, our final park, leopards are difficult to see. Although we had seen several in Ngala and Sabi Sands, we did not see any at Phinda until our last night, when the rest of the group had already left, and it was just me and my husband on our final game drive. The guide asked what we wanted to see and I said casually, Let’s just drive around and not bother trying to find any of the big cats. I don’t care if we see any, unless one walks in front of our vehicle. Guess what happened!

The elusive leopard walked right in front of our vehicle. It felt like a great sendoff from an absolutely perfect trip.

I love travelling, I love experiencing new things and places. We met so many wonderful people and we saw so many incredible things. I am so, so lucky. And although I love travelling, I also love my home. I was telling my older son – who is home now! – that when I am travelling I am so thrilled to be travelling, and then when I’m home I am thrilled to be home. So here I am! I have a three-week backlog of weeding to tackle, as well as catching up with all my friends. Currently, I have 206 unread blog posts in my reader, so it will take me a bit of time to get through them. Also, did I mention the weeds? In the meantime, tell me! How are you, friends? How have you been, what’s been happening, what are we doing these days? Tell me everything. xo

Scentsitive

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Last week I channeled my inner teen and headed for the mall. As a side note, I mentally capitalize The Mall as there is but one in this city. Upon entering, I was immediately and pleasantly assaulted by the scent of Cinnzeo, which seems to be the modern answer to Cinnabon. It’s nice that, although physical stores are in decline, some things are still the same.

There were two specific reasons I was mall-shopping, and the first was that I was picking up my free bag of truffles from the new Lindt store. I had signed up for their special rewards program specifically to get free chocolates during my birthday month. They didn’t have strawberry or mint, but I did try a new fudge swirl. The lack of strawberry has been a low-key grievance in my house. I am never mad at either of my sons, but a year or so ago my younger son ate the last dark chocolate strawberry truffle that I had been saving, post-Galentines Day 2025, and I have never let him forget it. That flavour is hard to find and indeed, I have not seen it since early 2025. Remember when you ate the last dark chocolate strawberry and I never found it again? I’ll ask him, to which he responds that I never actually told him I was saving it and also it was in the basket with all the other Lindt truffles that were NOT being saved for a future, special occasion, known only to me.

Is it too much to ask that he reads my mind?

The second reason I was going to the mall was to buy a birthday gift for my mother. I had brought her a gift from Cambodia but I wanted to supplement that with her favourite vanilla-scented body lotion from Bath and Body Works. While I was there, I thought I would purchase a few lotions for myself. I don’t wear perfume, but I do like to choose a different scented body lotion based on my mood and that day’s activities.

I was approached with an offer of help by one of the salespeople, an extremely friendly and jolly woman around my age, with a haircut that can only be described as “fun.” I didn’t really need help, but I do like chatting with salespeople, particularly at a place like Bath and Body Works, where there is no commission. And although I have my favourite scents, I always like sniffing new ones. Every favourite scent was once a stranger, as no one says.

But it was so odd. Every time I reached for one of my favourites, the woman shook her head gravely. No, she’d say. You don’t want THAT one. Then she would steer me over to something very rose-forward and floral, and insist that it was perfect for me. I would nod, politely, and then go back and grab the my favourites, the scents that she insisted were Too Much. Oh, she would say, her lavender spikes bobbing slightly, her eyebrows raised. You…LIKE that? Hmm. And then she would start to steer me towards the vile-smelling peach lotions.

It’s not like I require agreement from customer service personnel on my personal scent choices, or that I fear their judgement, but it was awkward.

I wonder what her feeling was when she left work that day. I wonder if she went home and bemoaned the difficulty of working with customers who just would not listen to her. I wonder if I seemed like the exact right person for Peach Blossom or Rose Garden, and it was disappointing that I refused to be the person she wanted me to be.

Weekly Reading

This Is Not About Us. An ill-timed, crowd-pleasing apple cake brought to a septuagenarian’s funeral spurs a years-long feud between the sisters of the deceased, and that’s how this absolute delight of a book begins. I laughed so much throughout this gem; I could totally see similar things happening in my own family. What can I say, if you have a large extended family, there is never a shortage of drama! The book unfolds in vignettes, each one focusing on different branches of the family. If you are looking for a thick plot, this is not for you, but if you are looking for a wonderful slice of a family’s life with compelling and relatable characters, look no further! I loved every sentence! Interestingly, the author wrote the incredible Isola – which I also loved – but the two books could not be more different.

Say You’ll Remember Me. This was a perfect book for a road trip: easy to read, not complicated, happy ending. What more do you need? Two people fall madly in love but live far apart – can a long distance romance work? She is caring for a mother with dementia, he has a brand new veterinary practice and tons of debt. Can they make it work? Spoiler alert: of course they can. I liked how this book portrayed financial realities and also the difficulty of being a caregiver (note: mother with dementia is three years older than I am, lord have mercy). Please note the page about returning shopping carts.

Our road trip was a lot of fun. My mom enjoyed her gifts, including the apparently divisive vanilla scented lotions. Vanilla? You want vaNILLA? the fun-haired woman said to me, like I was stating a preference for BO mixed with skunk. We had a good time all around, plus, the snowstorms, cold weather, and gale-force winds took a break, and we had lovely warm temperatures. There was a lot of snow in the mountain passes, but the roads were clear and the driving was smooth.

It looks like a perfect week for gardening, we have lots of sunshine ahead of us. May the Fourth be with you, friends! xo

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Southeast Asia Adventure Edition

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I’ve been home for two and a half weeks, and it already feels like my trip to Southeast Asia was some kind of dream that happened ages ago. This month has just flown by, what with travel and then recovering from travel, with catching up on all the one million things that I was behind on because of travel, and with running errands and going to appointments and all the little things that add up to make a life.

February is a short month, that’s true, but still I can hardly believe it’s time for Favourite Things already!

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Southeast Asia Adventure Edition

ELEPHANTS

Right out of the gate, I’m going to talk about elephants. Being around those magnificent creatures was the highlight of the trip – maybe even of my life – to the point that I can barely remember the rest of the tour. I have to go back and look at photos to remind myself that yes, there were MANY other incredible experiences. But elephants!

Such intelligent, beautiful animals. I love them, and it was such an incredible gift to be able to be so close to them and to see their personalities. The young male was particularly funny; he kept shoving greenery and bunches of bananas underneath his tusks, stealthily removing them to eat later. While we were in the pond bathing them, the male’s caretaker said something to him, at which point the elephant lowered his trunk into the water, raised it slowly, and sprayed us. I got sprayed! By an elephant! I did not even know that was on my list of things I wanted to happen in my life, but it was.

Silk and Silver

Cambodia is renowned for silver and for silk, and I love both of those things. We visited a silk farm and watched women weave; it was fascinating and intricate work, and the amount of labour that goes into a single scarf is astounding. I felt a strong sense of duty to support the local economy!

In Hong Kong: red wine and silk, two Favourite Things.

I have loved silver jewelry since I was a young teen, and when we visited a women-run family silversmith business, I had a hard time not buying everything I saw. After all, there’s always room in the carryon for necklaces.

I also fell in love with this little Buddha, who serenely sits on a windowsill.

Watch Out!

On our last day in Cambodia, my beloved Garmin watch died. It just completely and suddenly died, and I was bereft. And then I was bereft that I was bereft, because what kind of spoiled and terrible person is upset about a watch in a country where people are worried about things like land mines and poverty and lack of education.

And yet.

When it died, I realized that I check my watch many, many times an hour. Every time I reflexively looked at my naked wrist I felt sad anew, and then I felt sad for being sad, the snake is eating its tail. The day after the premature Garmin death, we flew to Bangkok, and as it turns out you can buy literally anything in Bangkok. If you can’t, it’s because it doesn’t exist. This is particularly true for technology, and so my husband and I headed for Siam Square mall on our free evening, where I found a Garmin and my husband found a sun hat and mango sticky rice.

This new updated watch is very fun as it gives me all sorts of cheerful encouragement throughout the day. Also I like to say, casually, I bought it in Bangkok. Just going to the mall in Bangkok felt like an adventure; we took tuk-tuks there and back and I did have a thought, as we zipped in and out of relentless traffic, breathing in fumes with the wind in our faces, what if we get in an accident? Well, if we did, I would not be here to tell the tale. Fortunately we did not, and we were able to witness the absolute chaos of one of the biggest malls in Bangkok on a Saturday night. So many teenagers! So many insanely loud people with microphones doing demonstrations of things I didn’t understand! So many interesting outfits! So many girls dressed like anime characters!

Not, obviously, the mall in Bangkok, but a photo of my new watch in the wild.

Mangoes and Pineapples

Speaking of mango sticky rice! I have never liked mangoes, but I now realize that is because I have always had Canadian imported mangoes, not fresh ripe ones. I could not get enough of fresh Thai mangoes, or of pineapple.

We visited a pineapple farm where I learned how they are grown. When I expressed astonishment, one of my new tour group friends said What, did you think they grew on a tree? and I guess I DID think that. More accurately, I have never once thought about it, which seems strange but is true. Anyway, a single pineapple takes one and a half years to grow, and each plant can grow up to three pineapples in its life. One and a half years! I am in awe of this spiky, crowned crop.

Shine On

Months ago my friend Suzanne (HI SUZANNE) recommended Neutrogena’s Invisible Daily Face Serum with SPF 50 and since I am a huge fan both of Suzanne and of Neutrogena products, I snapped one up later that same day. I will go on record to say that it is the best face sunscreen I have ever found. It’s light and not greasy, and is perfect for the kind of heat and humidity that I experienced in Asia.

I wanted to take a light foundation or BB cream as well, but all my containers felt a little big for the amount of makeup that I wanted. I want to be efficient with the amount of liquids I take in carryon luggage, and so I was intrigued by the tiny tube of Fenty Matte makeup that I saw on sale at Sephora. I think this tiny tube may see me into my grave, or, more accurately, it’s going to go bad before I use it up. It is a VERY high coverage item, so only the tiniest dab, mixed with the Neutrogena serum, is needed for a perfect, matte finish that – and I am not exaggerating here – lasts all day. Now, would I use this matte makeup at home in a dry Kelowna winter? I certainly would not. But it was perfect for the extreme humidity and heat. Even when my eye makeup melted, giving me the look of heavy eyeshadow without ever wearing eyeshadow, my skin stayed perfectly matte. THAT, my friends, is a product.

Outfit of the Month

It was handy that we went to the mall in Bangkok, because as it turned out, I had a pressing clothing need. The next day we were going to the Grand Palace, and my clothes were all, apparently, inappropriate. I had researched clothing requirements going in and I knew that my knees and shoulders needed to be covered much of the time, but what I didn’t know was that at the Grand Palace, “knees covered” only referred to skirts. Our guide told me that my capri-length pants were forbidden, and to just wear long pants. Friends, I did not have any long pants, and when I said this, three women in our group said, incredulously and almost in chorus, Nicole, you don’t have PANTS? followed by three offers to loan me some. I would have taken them up on had I not seen this skirt at an outdoor kiosk at the mall:

I think I’m entering my long floaty skirt era. Once I got used to not stepping on it while going up the stairs, I really loved wearing it. So light! So cool! So princess-like! I wore it to the Grand Palace, with a sleeved tee from the Gap that I bought ages ago, and Skecher sandals, and then I wore it again later that night after my second shower of the day. It was extremely hot at the Grand Palace, and so my clothing was less fresh than I would have liked, but sacrifices must be made in the name of travel. An old friend of my husband’s happened to be in Bangkok for only a few days at the exact time we were there, and so we met up with him for dinner, where I nosily dug into his entire backstory. He is what I would call a free spirit, and has been travelling the world for the past forty years. He regaled me with tales from the first time he was in Thailand, thirty years ago. Malaria and amoebic dysentery featured heavily in some of the stories, and I was here for it. Amoebic dysentery! I guess I ate something I shouldn’t have he said when I asked multiple questions, which feels like an understatement of all time. None of this has anything to do with my new skirt and my new era of long floaty skirt wearing, but it was an interesting night out.

It’s a privilege to travel and a privilege to come home. I hope your month was full of Favourite Things too. Tell me everything. xo

My Southeast Asia Adventure

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Happy Monday! For Valentine’s Day, I got a lot of sleep, and thank goodness. I think I underestimated how exhausted I was from travel, jetlag, and the busyness of our trip to Southeast Asia. It was well worth it but still I am glad to be, in the words of Spirit of the West, home for a rest.

We took a guided group tour with Travel Talk Tours, and on the first leg – Vietnam to Cambodia – there were 26 of us. Six people left, and two more joined when we arrived in Thailand. It was a nice mix of people; mostly Canadian, followed by British, with one couple each from India and the US. I will say that guided tours are fantastic for seeing a lot in a limited amount of time, and with all the border crossings and transportation, it was very relaxing to have all of the logistics taken care of. Also, it’s great to meet people from all over the world! For those of you who were wondering, there were no “Ms NZ’s” on this trip, although I did encounter an absolutely dreadful woman from Estonia on our boat crossing from Vietnam to Cambodia. She was the only unlikeable person I met during the entire trip.

Good Morning Vietnam!

After twenty-six hours of travel, we arrived in Vietnam. Our hotel let us check in five hours early, so we happily showered and immediately went exploring in order to stay awake before meeting up with our group that evening.

Ho Chi Minh City

Still often referred to as Saigon, Ho Chi Minh City is a busy, chaotic city – and I loved it! We quickly learned how to cross streets in Vietnam: just start walking, and hope for the best.

Mekong Delta, Cai Be, Can Tho

The very next day we headed to the Mekong Delta, where we boated around for a while and visited floating markets.

We enjoyed the night markets at Can Tho, and that was where I had the best meal in the entire trip. As a side note, it was not as easy to find delicious vegetarian dishes as I thought it would be. I was absolutely able to get rice or noodles and vegetables everywhere, but any dish more interesting than that was a rare sighting. Particularly in Thailand, where there was fish sauce and egg in nearly everything, it was trickier to eat. It was not at all hard to be dairy-free, though.

Chau Doc

This was such an interesting place; Chau Doc has a hotel from which a large speedboat launches to take tourists across the border to Cambodia. This is where having an organised group tour really pays off; the border crossing was as smooth as it could be, given that there were quite a number of restrictions and a lot of paperwork to be done. Other than the one hotel, Chau Doc is NOT a tourist destination; in fact, there are no shops, no restaurants, and certainly no English speakers that we encountered. My husband and I opted out of the bird watching excursion because I could not stand the thought of being on the bus for another two hours, and instead we wandered around the town that could not have cared less about us. It was a really cool experience.

Phnom-enal Cambodia

After a total of six hours on the boat and an hour at the border crossing, we landed in Phnom Penh, Cambodia. I absolutely loved Cambodia, and I think everyone should visit and boost up that country with tourism dollars.

Phnom Penh

Phnom Penh is the capital of Cambodia, and I had emotional whiplash there. We visited our first of many Buddhist temples, where I was so happy, followed by a visit to the genocide museum, where we met one of the seven survivors of the prison and killing fields. Seven! And two are still alive. It was incredibly moving and both a testament to the human will to survive and also to the absolute horrors of the Pol Pot regime. After that, I was emotionally wrecked – I basically started to hyperventilate while looking at the mug shots of all the prisoners – but then we were taken to our absolutely stunning hotel complete with rooftop bar and hip hop music. I did not expect that at all. If that wasn’t enough of an emotional turn, the next day we toured the Royal Palace in all its beauty.

Battenbang

We saw SO much on this part of the tour! Travel Talk, like most responsible tour groups, chooses family-run businesses to patronise, which lifts them up out of poverty. We visited two women-run businesses: silver smithing and pottery. The pottery woman, in her early 60s, was a widow who also looked after her adult brother, born without the use of his legs. Life is very hard in general in Cambodia, but for widows and the disabled it is particularly difficult. In any case, I was very pleased to use my shopping dollars for silver and pottery! In between those two, we climbed to a hilltop temple, visited a monastery, and then went to a cave to watch the nightly migration of eight MILLION bats coming out of a cave. I will tell you that by that time, I was tired and a bit cranky, and as I stared at the cave I thought this is stupid. But then! A couple of reconnaissance bats flew out, followed by an enormous flow of bats that continued for twenty minutes. It was honestly really incredible to see. Nature! It is miraculous. The bats feed on the insects in the rice paddies that would otherwise harm the crops.

The next morning we took a ride on a bamboo train, which I thought would be an actual train, but instead was this:

It was honestly so fun; once these were used to haul bamboo and other things, but now they are used for tourist rides, and I am one hundred percent into anything that brings money to these regions. After that we climbed to another hilltop temple – this one an ancient Hindu temple – and carried on to Siem Reap.

Siem Reap

We had a fantastic day touring Angkor Wat, Angkor Thom, and Ta Ream. Truly incredible sights, a memorable day to be sure.

I was seeking out shade – we were there in “winter” and wow, it was hot!

Thai-ing Out Thailand

We flew from Siem Reap to Bangkok, and if you think I didn’t have One Night in Bangkok stuck in my head, then you don’t know me at all.

Bangkok

There are 44000 temples in Thailand, and I will say one thing right now: if you’re not interested in temples, maybe give this trip a pass. Fortunately, I AM interested, and a day in which we visited two temples and the Grand Palace, where the famous Emerald Buddha resides, was lovely.

The queen’s mother had just died, and so the Grand Palace was not open to visitors until 1pm, which meant that it was very hot and very crowded – but hey, it’s Bangkok! The world’s our oyster!

Kanchanaburi, Ayutthaya

After Bangkok, we visited a museum dedicated to those who died building the railroad from Thailand to Burma, and went to the Mae Klong river, also known as the River Kwai.

We took a short hike through Hellfire Pass and saw Burma in the distance.

Phisanoruk

This day started early for six of us, who got up to make a food donation to a local monk, and received blessings in return. After that we visited more temples, and the remains of an ancient royal palace.

Sukhothai, Chaing Rai

There were a few long driving days, but we saw more incredible temples and a “hidden” Buddha.

Chaing Rai is home to the Blue Temple – my favourite colour! – and the very Instagrammable White Temple. I know this is a controversial opinion, but I love seeing people set up photos that are obviously meant for Instagram. It’s kind of delightful.

Chaing Mai

There are some days that will forever be etched in my memory. This was one of the best days of my entire life. We visited an elephant sanctuary, where we fed, bathed, and walked with elephants that had been rescued from very bad situations in the logging industry and circuses. Elephants are such incredible creatures, and it was such a gift to be so close to them.

A couple of people have asked about the clothing that we were all wearing: the rescue organisation gives every visitor to the sanctuary these red outfits to wear, plus rubber boots. Elephants cannot see very well, and because of their abused pasts, get agitated with unknown people. But they associate these red outfits with safe people, and so they accept the presence of visitors wearing them calmly and without stress.

If that wasn’t enough, after the elephants we drove up a very long and winding road to a temple that overlooks Chaing Mai. I was not particularly prepared for this, and was wearing a tank top and short skirt, which are not allowed inside a temple. I had resigned myself to just walking around the outer area.

As I looked at the temple entrance, a woman materialised beside me, holding out a shawl and a long skirt, nodding toward it. I am not one to turn down signs like that. I put the clothing on overtop my clothes, and ended up being blessed by the monk inside.

Hong Kong

The next day we got up early for our flight to Hong Kong. Such a fascinating and busy city it is! We had only a day and a half there, but definitely made the most of it, exploring on foot and taking the Peak Tram to look at the city. The city is preparing for Lunar New Year, and I enjoyed all the horses around.

It was a wonderful trip, and I’d like to go back in that direction one day to explore northern Vietnam and the beaches of Thailand. I’ll be back later this week to tell you about the books I read – including a DNF! – but for now, I hope you have a wonderful week, friends. Thanks for coming along on the journey. xo