What and Why
When I was in Grade Five or so, my best friend’s mom imposed a rule on her that she could not take out “junk” books from the library. She was not allowed to read what the rest of us were furtively reading, which were the Sweet Valley High and Cheerleader series, and their ilk. At the time it struck me as patently unfair, and now, looking back on it, it strikes me as patently stupid. What kind of a person puts reading restrictions on a ten-year-old? Even my own mother, who was no slouch in the “strict rules” department, did not know or care what I was reading at any given time; I soon graduated from those books to things like Flowers in the Attic, Clan of the Cave Bear, and Elvis and Me, all of which combined to give me a very strange outlook on life. To this day I will not eat powdered doughnuts.
No matter. I strongly believe that kids should read just what they want to read, and so should adults, with no apologies. For me, I have always been interested almost exclusively in the lives of girls and women – both the concept and the actual book – and so the vast majority of the books I read have female protagonists and are written by women. In fact, it’s somewhat of a joke in my house if I’m reading a book written by a man: the guys will ask if he’s gay, British, or gay and British, and indeed, that does tend to be the exception to my women-only rule. There are exceptions to the exception, though; this calendar year I have read two 5-star books by non-gay, non-British men, The Remains of the Day and Grace and Henry’s Holiday Movie Marathon.
I love character-driven novels about the minutia of life, I love books about the extraordinariness of ordinary life, I love prose and dialogue that is clever, witty, and beautiful. This means much of my reading is women’s literary fiction, although I do like an occasional upmarket or romance. I do not care for dystopian books at all, but as I said, there are exceptions: I love both The Handmaid’s Tale and I Who Have Never Known Men. I don’t like magical realism or fantasy, but I loved The Husbands and The Mists of Avalon, the latter of which I have read multiple times. I shy away from horror, having been scarred by a single reading of Misery back in 1990, and also because I generally am easily terrified. Books that contain time travel, sci-fi, or futuristic timelines are completely uninteresting to me and I refuse to read them. I don’t tend to gravitate toward thrillers or mysteries, but occasionally I will be coaxed into one by a glowing review from my friend Suzanne, and I always end up enjoying it (HI SUZANNE). Historical fiction is a tricky category for me. I don’t like when things wrap up too neatly, and also my number one pet peeve is when current day values or language are imposed on a book of yesteryear, which happens often in historical fiction. That said, I absolutely loved Isola, as well as any number of novels about spunky letter-writing women during the Blitz in London. I enjoy a well-written and entertaining memoir and the occasional interesting non-fiction as well. Sometimes I think I should branch out more, genre-wise, but mostly I just embrace what I like.
Who and Where
My TBR – to be read – list is staggeringly long and it just gets longer every day. The problem is I have so many well-read friends who are always recommending excellent books, although I have gotten very selective as to who I take recommendations from, having blindly picked up, and then regretted, many titles. And it goes the other way too: I once had an old school friend message me on Instagram, angry that she had BOUGHT three books on my glowing recommendations, and that “nothing happened in any of them!” They were so boring and I can’t believe you liked them! What a waste of money! she said. Well. The only thing I can say to that is that you really need to know a person’s taste BEFORE you take on their recommendations, and certainly before you commit to buying them. Support your local libraries! It’s a cost-free way to read – or not read – as many books as you like.
Speaking of Instagram, I do get a lot of recommendations from there; I follow a number of bookstagram accounts, and I also have some friends who are avid readers and with whom I share interests and tastes. My friend Anna (HI ANNA) and I enjoy 95% of the same books, so when she recommends something, I listen. I also get a lot of ideas from blog friends; notably Allison (HI ALLISON) who puts up a very detailed annual summary every January. I take a lot of her four and five star fiction recommendations. She is much wider-read than I am, genre-wise, but she always separates out horror, sci-fi, thriller, and mysteries, so I don’t get myself entangled in anything that I am uninterested in or scared of.
I also get a number of recommendations from podcasts, although that has been hit-and-miss for me. I enthusiastically picked up The Idea of You based on a podcaster’s recommendation and I never trusted that woman again. Just like that old school friend will never trust me again. The world is a vast tapestry, big wheel keeps on turning, Proud Mary keeps on burning.
When and How
I read 2-3 books per week, almost all physical books, the rest on an ereader, and the reason I can manage this pace is twofold: I am a fast reader, and I carve out time to read every day. Even in my busiest eras of life, of which I am markedly NOT in currently, I always made time for reading daily. Reading is the R in my REM Y REM protocol for mental health and general well-being. (Exercise, Meditation, Yoga, and REM sleep are the other key parts). I read both in small snippets throughout the day, and then longer stretches in the later afternoon or evening. My husband is a sports fan, and there are games or tournaments or what have you most months of the year, so while he watches those in the evening I keep him company by reading on the couch. I try to read for an additional 30-60 minutes during the afternoon, depending on my day. I read while I eat lunch, I always have a book in my bag so I have something to read if I’m delayed or waiting somewhere, and I try to pick up my current read whenever I have a few spare minutes, rather than scroll on my phone. Recently my friend Elisabeth (HI ELISABETH) shared a “Couch to 5K,” but for reading, which I think is kind of brilliant. We are all so fractured, attention-wise, these days that I think there is real value in just concentrating on a book. It’s beneficial for our brains and our outlooks on life. What could give us more knowledge and information than reading? It’s never wasted time, as far as I’m concerned, and I never feel guilty about it. I know plenty of people who feel that reading is unproductive, but a) what are we being productive for, b) taking time for ourselves benefits everyone in a “put on your oxygen mask before helping others with theirs” way, and c) fuck the patriarchy that wants to keep women busy every second of the day.
Weekly Reading
A Woman in Berlin. I know I declared Reread Fortnight to be over, but I squeezed in one more, which I first read about 25 years ago for a now-long-defunct book club. This is an actual account, based on the author’s diary and notes, of the fall of Berlin in 1945. If ever you are having a bad day, remember you are not a woman in Berlin, a city which was bombed to rubble, foraging for food and getting raped six ways to Sunday by the Red Army, all with the shame of what your country’s leadership has done. It is grim. But here is an interesting sidebar: up until TWO WEEKS AGO, I had a picture in my mind of post-war Germany, and that picture had a line down the centre, dividing it into East and West Germany. I had assumed that Berlin just happened to be in the middle of that line, thus the division and eventual wall. HOW WRONG I WAS! Berlin is actually very deep into the heart of what was East Germany, so that West Berlin was surrounded on all sides by red, if you will. This blows my mind! I had no idea. If you were a person in West Berlin, would you be able to travel to West Germany easily? I suppose there would be checkpoints and so forth, but it is a long way from West Berlin to West Germany. If anyone can point me to further reading material on this subject, I would be very grateful. I know I have some German readers, so please let me know if you have any recommendations.
Silver Sparrow. I loved this book about two girls who are half-sisters – one of them knows it, one of them doesn’t. Their father is a bigamist, and this is a dual-perspective story about the lives of the two girls as they grow up in Atlanta, but it’s so much more. The characters are so richly developed, and there is such a statement about generational cycles. The ending made my jaw drop a little. A beautifully-written, compelling story.
The Sweet Spot. Oh, I loved this delightfully heartwarming book with all its charming characters and really great arcs. It has all my favourite literary f-words: found family, friends, funny dialogue, and forgiveness. There’s fucking too, but it’s all closed-door and perfectly non-spicy, which is exactly how I like it, literarily speaking. I love it when a motley crew of characters all end up working together for a common goal, and that is exactly what happens when a baby finds itself in need of a caretaker – or, in this case, many caretakers. This is just a lovely, feel-good book, perfect cheer for a gloomy, rainy weekend. WHO recommended this book? I owe you one! And not in the way of my old school friend, or, I should say, my former school friend.
There was some sad news this week: Dolly Parton passed away. She was an absolute angel, and among numerous significant charitable contributions was a champion for children’s literacy. I dedicate this book talk miniseries to her memory. May she rest in fabulous, over-the-top, glittery peace.
