I am perpetually cold. I wear a minimum of two layers at any given time for ninety percent of the year. The other ten percent belongs to the days that are spent vacationing in warmer climes and the two to three weeks a year in Calgary that temperatures actually warrant the removal of a sweater. […]
Blue Monday Cures
January 17, 2011 by
Today is Blue Monday, the day that is scientifically and mathematically proven to be the most depressing of the year. So let’s fight the power, shall we? If the best way to spread Christmas cheer is by singing (implied: Christmas songs) loud for all to hear, then C(x) = f(singing), then it follows that the […]
Nicole’s 300th Episode!
January 15, 2011 by
It’s my 300th blog post! If this were a sitcom, I would totally make this a clip show. As it is, I looked back through some of my archives and discovered the following things: a) I write a lot about being insane and germ-phobic, b) I talk about the weather as much as someone who […]
Censorship: Dire Straits, Little House, and Huckleberry Finn
January 13, 2011 by
Did you hear that “Money for Nothing” is now banned on Canadian radio stations? Banned! This is incredibly startling news for me, given that the song originally came out in 1985. So, twenty-six years later, it has been decided that the word “faggot” – when used by derogatory men who are moving the singer’s fantastic […]
Where the hell is my invincible summer?
January 11, 2011 by
“Mom! It’s going to be hot outside!” Jake shrieked from the living room this morning, where the seven-day weather forecast was being shown on the “news”. “Look! It says it’s going to be sunny!” I had to explain the difference between sunny and actual heat, but the conversation didn’t really take and I have to […]
Makeup, Wine, and Say Anything
January 9, 2011 by
I live in a neighbourhood with a lot of senior citizens, so I’m pretty used to opening my mailbox to find flyers from McInnis and Holloway about planning my own funeral so that things will go just the way I imagine. Not that I imagine my funeral much, but it’s nice to know that the […]
All the cool kids are doing it!
January 6, 2011 by
And so will I – a Year in Review. Yes, I know it is the sixth of January and most year in reviews have already been posted, but I was far too busy writing about people who eat toilet paper and watching When Harry Met Sally. So what happened in 2010 over at the Boy […]