When I was pregnant with Jake I started to develop varicose veins. My calves are full of what I would call normal-looking varicose veins, puffy and purple. My left leg, however, looks like a miniature boa constrictor somehow found its way under my skin and is attempting to suffocate my knee and thigh. It’s not […]
Archives for 2011
"Child abuse": a little rant
January 24, 2011 by 10 Comments
How was your weekend? Mine was quite lovely filled with lots of socializing – hello, fulfilled New Year’s Resolution! – and food. Much delicious food, most of which was made by me. Yesterday I made my friend Happy Geek’s favourite pasta salad, and now I am ruing the day that I discovered said recipe, as […]
International Hug Day! Smooch!
January 21, 2011 by 7 Comments
Today is International Hug Day! What an ending to a week that started off with the Saddest Day of the Year. Here’s a question: how is the date of International Hug Day actually decided, and by whom? Not that it matters; I plan on ambushing all my friends with giant hugs all day long. Well, […]
These boots were made for walking in the winter.
January 19, 2011 by 13 Comments
I am perpetually cold. I wear a minimum of two layers at any given time for ninety percent of the year. The other ten percent belongs to the days that are spent vacationing in warmer climes and the two to three weeks a year in Calgary that temperatures actually warrant the removal of a sweater. […]
Blue Monday Cures
January 17, 2011 by 9 Comments
Today is Blue Monday, the day that is scientifically and mathematically proven to be the most depressing of the year. So let’s fight the power, shall we? If the best way to spread Christmas cheer is by singing (implied: Christmas songs) loud for all to hear, then C(x) = f(singing), then it follows that the […]
Nicole’s 300th Episode!
January 15, 2011 by 8 Comments
It’s my 300th blog post! If this were a sitcom, I would totally make this a clip show. As it is, I looked back through some of my archives and discovered the following things: a) I write a lot about being insane and germ-phobic, b) I talk about the weather as much as someone who […]
Censorship: Dire Straits, Little House, and Huckleberry Finn
January 13, 2011 by 11 Comments
Did you hear that “Money for Nothing” is now banned on Canadian radio stations? Banned! This is incredibly startling news for me, given that the song originally came out in 1985. So, twenty-six years later, it has been decided that the word “faggot” – when used by derogatory men who are moving the singer’s fantastic […]
