Category Archives: Books

Bits and Bobs; Seventy Three Weeks In

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Bo Duke Channels Elvis

On the long drive home from vacation, I learned that John Schneider – of Dukes of Hazzard fame – had a hit song in the 70s, covering Elvis’ It’s Now or Never. Not only that, but he had a fairly successful career as a country singer AND co-founded the Children’s Miracle Network in 1983. WHO KNEW.

Does anyone else remember, in the late 80s, when Bruce Willis had a hit song under the alias Bruno, and it was a cover of Respect Yourself? I actually didn’t even know it was a cover until I recently heard the original, to be honest. And, of course, Eddie Murphy rocked the charts with his Party All The Time, and Patrick Swayze dominated our junior high slow dances with She’s Like The Wind.

The 80s were a magical time.

Put Your Records On

Not a day goes by that I don’t feel immense gratitude for Spotify. What an age we live in. Back in those magical 80s, we either had to buy whole albums, or create our own mix tapes from songs on the radio, and inevitably those radio-recorded songs had the jingle for the station or chatter from the DJ at the beginning or end. There were, of course, hit mixes available for purchase – remember those old informercials on TV that would offer six or eight albums worth of hits from different eras and genres, all for a weirdly prohibitive price? Ultimately, if you loved a song, you had to pay for it in some way: either through purchase of an album or with your time, finger poised on the “record” button of your tape recorder during the Top Ten at Ten.

Now, of course, any song is available to me at any time. Yes, I still pay for it – Spotify isn’t free, or not the version we have – but our family gets more than its money’s worth.

However, and I find this interesting, my older son is very into listening to WHOLE ALBUMS on Spotify. He listens from beginning to end and appreciates the artistic flow of the songs, and album themes. It’s very fun to discuss albums with him, like Dark Side of the Moon or The White Album.

When the boys were very small, I would listen to Kanye West’s Late Registration in the car almost constantly, so much so that one day my two-year-old said to my mom, “Grandma, I ain’t got no money so I ain’t got no ho’s,” and my one-year-old said to that same long-suffering mother of mine, “We want prenup.” After that I didn’t listen to it quite as much, at least when the kids were in the car, but the CD has been in my glove box all this time, the discovery of which by my son and his music-loving friend reinforced my status as The Cool Mom. Apparently, it is One of the Greatest Albums of All Time, and we listened to it on the long drive home from vacation.

You guys, it’s really good! Say what you will about ‘Ye, but that album is truly a creative masterpiece, with so much social commentary. You know the best medicine goes to people who paid, if Magic Johnson got a cure for AIDS, and all the broke motherfuckers pass away.

Speaking of Which

My sister-in-law discovered that her and my husband’s late grandma was a huge fan of Jackie Kennedy, as being the first Catholic First Lady. This discovery was made when my sister-in-law found stacks and stacks of magazines and newspapers featuring the style icon, and let me tell you, going through them was an experience.

This one was probably my favourite, not because of Jackie but because of this:

Rock Hudson! Crazy games he plays with women! Perhaps those crazy games include not having sex with them. God, how sad. Once again I am thankful to live in the modern age where, not only can we call up John Schneider’s Greatest Hits at will, but people can be free to be themselves.

Also, you don’t tend to see matches like this anymore:

She was 19 and he was 50! Hoo boy. Although I just found out that Cary Grant retired from acting at age 62 to spend time with his first and only child. At age 62. You know, biology is cruel. Here we women are, hot flashing all over the place in our forties, considered by society to be well past our prime, and then men are fathering children literally any time in their adult lives. Not that I would want a baby at 62 – I certainly don’t want one NOW, in my forties – but still.

Calendar Girl

“Hey, the girl on the calendar looks just like you!” my husband said, looking at an Investor’s Group promotional calendar. The boys gathered around and expressed their amazement at my doppelgänger.

I mean. IS that me? Did someone from Investor’s Group photograph me in secret? In any case, this means I could have a whole career of calendar modelling ahead of me! I could be a pinup girl! Perhaps this will be my future.

Outfit of the Week

We are still having A Summer; the weather continues hot and dry. I am getting so much wear out of my skorts this year. This is just a nice, cool, comfy outfit: black skort and yoga tank, both from lululemon, plus Skechers sandals.

Also, I got my hair cut this week! Possibly I should have taken a “before” photo, but I got an inch and a half of frayed, dry, rough ends cut off.

Pandemic Reading

When You Are Engulfed In Flames. My love for David Sedaris is well documented, but what is up with the cover photo? I don’t know. Anyway, this book of essays is a great mix of laugh-out-loud anecdotes mixed with thought-provoking stories. About a third of this book is one long essay about quitting smoking and moving to, of all places, Tokyo for three months.

Songs At The River’s Edge. About twenty years ago, I read an excerpt from this book in a women’s travel anthology; the excerpt dealt with a village woman’s marriage and subsequent move to her husband’s family’s bari, or homestead. After reading that, I wanted to read the whole book but alas, it was out of print. Something made me think of it again and through the magic of the internet, I found a used copy on Amazon. It was so worth the wait! In 1987, the author, doing post-graduate work in social anthropology, lives with a family in rural Bangladesh for sixteen months. I found this incredibly fascinating. I love reading about the lives of women in other cultures, even when some of the stories are heartbreakingly sad. The main theme for women is shame; to be a woman is to be naturally mired in shame. They are essentially powerless; the marriage that first intrigued me is arranged, but the woman doesn’t find out that she is to be married until it’s almost her wedding day. Women get married and then must live with their in-laws, only returning to their own families when they are about to have babies. So the women are powerless, but in some ways they are powerful, the women truly look after each other and have strong bonds which we don’t really see in our culture. The family life is so rich and intertwined, and the people live truly based on the seasons. I just loved this book and, if you are interested in Bengali culture and traditional Islamic beliefs, I recommend it to you.

The Anne Series – Part One.

Since I was pausing my library holds for vacation, I extended that pause until the 10th in order to read a few of the books on my shelves, like the ones above. I decided I was going to reread the Anne series, a childhood favourite of mine. Will I finish before my holds come in? Spoiler alert: no. I accidentally ended one of my pauses on the 3rd and a book has already come in, however, I shall press on and do my best. So far, this is what I’ve read:

Anne of Green Gables. The OG! This book details Anne’s accidental arrival at Green Gables – Marilla and Matthew wanted a boy to help with the farm work, but famously ended up with Anne. Just like my adult reread of Heidi, a few pretty grim things struck me: the families who took Anne in prior to the Cuthberts were using her just as childcare, even though she was only 11 by the time she went to Green Gables, and one of those families included an abusive alcoholic husband, the idea that you could go to an orphanage and just pick yourself out a child based on nothing, and then treating them poorly is pretty gross, and Matthew dies because of heart trouble, yes, but heart trouble brought on by the failure of the bank at which all his money is kept. Still a very lovely book with lots of gorgeous nature descriptions and life lessons, and I found that I really empathized with Marilla, which was unexpected.

Anne of Avonlea. I remember this as being my least-favourite in the series, and I can see why. Anne becomes a teacher at the Avonlea school and is quite involved with a very precocious young boy; she is instrumental in getting his widowed father back together with his first love, who never married after they quarreled 25 years prior. Lover’s quarrel, man gets married, woman pines for him forever, man becomes widowed, man comes back to Avonlea and marries woman who has been pining for him forever. Huh. Also, there is a storyline with twins that come to live at Green Gables, and it feels just like old 80s sitcoms when the cute child actors would grow up and be replaced by new cute child actors.

Anne of the Island. Oh, this is probably my favourite of all the Anne books! Anne goes to college in Nova Scotia and lives in a sweet house called Patty’s Place with three other girls and one of the girl’s aunts. It’s just such a lovely book about “coed” life, friendship, and romance. After she turns down Gilbert, she starts dating this very romantic, very handsome, very rich, very eligible bachelor, Royal Gardner. Spoiler alert: she does not love him! Spoiler alert: after Gilbert, who finishes his own BA and starts med school, gets really sick and almost dies. ANNE LOVES GILBERT AND IN THIS BOOK SHE FINALLY CAPITULATES TO HER FATE.

It’s going to be a fun week, I can feel it. Here we are heading into mid-August already; I am going to continue to Embrace the Season and soak up every minute. Have a great week! xo

Pandemic Vacation Reading List

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In my last post I alluded to the books I read on vacation; I said I had some recommendations and also a controversial opinion. The great thing about living in the current age is, when it comes to books, there is something for everyone, and we don’t all have to like the same things!

I always like a good mix of reading; light books mixed with thought-provoking books, with different points of view and ideas. I especially like this on vacation, although my book choices tend to skew towards the “light” end, as you will see. To be honest, I read most of these books because I they finally came in at the library, after I had them on hold, but some of the books I picked up in person, and that is still a novel thing that I will be grateful for, after months of not being able to browse the shelves.

Pandemic Vacation Reading

Rebecca. I read this book as a teenager and was inspired to pick it up again after I saw my friend Anna (HI ANNA) post about it. I didn’t remember too much about it except that there was a dead wife and a mean housekeeper. It reads differently than when I was young but hooooo boy, it’s macabre and haunting. I really like it, this story of a young woman who marries a rich widower and goes to live on his fabulous estate. His late wife seems to be everywhere though…especially in his thoughts. Things aren’t always what they seem, though, and scandal lurks everywhere! This was written in 1938 and set in a wealthy English estate, which was right before those wealthy English estates were a thing of the past. There’s a very upstairs/ downstairs theme, which fans of Downton Abbey will enjoy, but also, it is DARK. I enjoyed it a lot.

The Book of Longings. Here is the controversial opinion: I was so very disappointed with this. I’m going to preface this by saying that I think historical fiction is one of the most difficult genres to get “right.” It’s hard not to put modern voices into historical fiction. I also think that the concept of this book is wonderful and interesting: it follows Jesus’ wife, who is an educated writer. Yeah. I have been looking forward to reading this for months – I have had it on hold for at least six months, I really have enjoyed other books by this author – and to be honest, it was a huge disappointment. I found it incredibly boring, and it shouldn’t have been, with that kind of interesting premise. It is SUCH a great idea, but it dragged for me, and the dialogue seemed off. Oh well. I know many, many people have just loved this book but I am not one of them.

The Stylist Takes Manhattan. When on the beach, a beach read is a must! This was just fun and fluffy. Sometimes I love a satisfyingly silly read and this was that! It is apparently number two in a series but believe me when I say you do not have to read the first one to keep up with the plot. A young British woman, who used to be a stylist for the stars but now designs window displays at Selfridge’s (I think it was Selfridge’s, it’s been a few weeks since I read it) moves to Manhattan for three months with her boyfriend. She gets a job, connects with an out-of-favour designer, there is a big misunderstanding and then everything ties up nicely. Very satisfying.

Everyone In This Room Will Someday Be Dead. I really enjoyed this quirky debut! Gilda suffers crippling anxiety and depression, and goes to seek “free therapy.” She finds out it is at a Catholic church, but instead of getting therapy, she accidentally gets hired as a church receptionist. (One of the reasons she gets hired by the 70-year-old priest: she knows how to use the internet and email!). She’s gay and atheist, and it feels very wrong to her to be working for the church, but she gets caught up in a web of misunderstanding. Mysterious questions arise around the passing of the previous receptionist, and how she ended up being hired. This was a really good, quick read. It was a compassionate and also very witty look inside the head of a person who is suffering from anxiety.

Let Me Tell You What I Mean. I really like Joan Didion’s writing and this collection of essays is very good. I especially enjoy her early work, getting a view of the late Sixties in California. I mean, what an era! Most of the essays were from the Sixties, but there are a few from later decades as well.

First Comes Like. What’s the book equivalent of a romantic comedy? Is it just a romantic comedy? Anyway, I love a good literary rom-com, which this is: fun and fluffy, sweet, silly, and satisfying. This was particularly good because the main characters were different from our usual white rom-com ones: the story involves a Muslim woman who is a social media star for her makeup and skin care tutorials, and a Hindu television soap actor from a famous Bollywood family. Most rom-com books seem to have predominantly white characters, and so I loved the little details like how Jia matched her headscarf to her outfit, and how she doesn’t drink alcohol, and she observes her five daily prayers. I also liked references to Bollywood and Hindu culture. The other interesting thing is how the story occasionally alludes to Covid, without mentioning Covid – Jia was sick, her physician sisters were all so busy over “the past year,” one of her sisters suffers lung issues from illness. I immediately added this author’s other titles to my hold list at the library.

We Are All Perfectly Fine. Remember in the beginning of the pandemic when we all had that “let’s pull together, we can do this” attitude, and then it was just relentless and we all became fatigued? I have always wondered about how the medical community copes with relentless stress. This book is about physician burnout, not pandemic related, just generally. It’s a moving memoir by a physician with a complex family history. Here’s an interesting tidbit: the author was just about to go to London to do her PhD in literature, but ends up going to med school at McMaster instead. I mean, how does that even happen? My mind is blown. She decides on medicine as her sister is very medically complicated, after being incredibly disabled from childhood brain cancer, and she wants to add her compassion to the medical community. She does this by working in an inner-city area with very marginalized people, but ultimately burns herself out, which is what this book is about.

All in all, a satisfying vacation reading list; what is everyone else reading these days? xo

Face Facts; Seventy Weeks In

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I was hiking with the boys and, as I always do, I greeted a pair of women we passed on the path. We exchanged some pleasantries about the day and the steepness of the hike – we hiked Prairie Mountain, it is straight up and straight down, with zero gentle switchbacks – and then we carried on our way. I heard the women speaking rapidly in French behind us, like they were discussing something, and, later when we were taking a break, they went to pass us. They paused for a moment, and then one of the women approached me and said, “This is a very strange question, maybe, but are you an economist?”

I said yes, and then we looked at each other for a moment. It took a beat but then I recognized her from my time at the Economics Society, back in the Nineties; she was a prominent member at that time, and I was still a grad student. It had been twenty-five years since we had seen each other, and I expressed my astonishment not only that we should run into each other on a hiking trail on a random Monday morning in July, but also that she recognized me after all this time. She said, “Well, of course I did, you look exactly the same!”

I used to think this kind of statement, while very kind, generous, and well-meaning, is an objectively wrong one, but I think I am at a point in my life where I understand it. Objectively, I do not look exactly the same as I did in 1996, nor does anyone else. Twenty-five years of living changes a person physically, obviously. However, the essence of a person can be unchanged over that time period; after all, I recognized this woman immediately as well, and she would have been younger than I am now when I last saw her. It’s not unlike when you see a childhood group photo and you can instantly recognize your friends; no one looks the same as they did when they were a child, but their essence is still there.

My mother-in-law once said to me that she never really sees me as aging; to her, I just look like the same Nicole she’s always known, and I understand what that means. I see my friends and loved ones in the same way; maybe there are a few more lines or changes, but essentially, I just see the same people I know and love. It’s more than just physical, even if the last time I saw a person was in high school, I can still immediately see the person I knew then, shining through now. I never think Jesus, maybe some eye cream? I just think Yay, there’s my beautiful friend. All of which goes to show that we never really see ourselves as others see us, we are our own worst critics, and if we could treat ourselves the way we treat our friends, the world would be an infinitely better place.

Speaking of which. Lately I have had a disproportionately large number of friends and acquaintances on social media show their before and after photos, the before and after referring to Botox and dermal fillers. I am going to tell you this: they all, without exception, look fantastic. It’s quite incredible; they look like the same people, but smoother and fresher. They don’t look weird or fake in any way, they look like they have applied an Instagram filter, but in real life.

I try not to compare myself to others, but I found myself comparing my own face – which is, in repose, bitchy-looking at best, haggard and Crypt Keeper-like at worst – to their smooth and fresh faces. I am generally a confident person with healthy self-esteem, but I was kind of feeling bad about myself. This feeling was not unlike the one I get when I look at Instagram photos of women my age, but don’t realize that they are filtered, and I end up wondering how I got to looking like the Crypt Keeper when everyone else looks young and lovely.

It’s hard to explain the opposing forces in my brain. I am, as you all know, Pro-Aging, but I am also not made of stone, people. I took some time to do a little research and I discovered that my old dermatologist – who I went to for acne issues, hello Circle of Life – performs these sorts of procedures. I kept reading and realized that one of the contraindications to getting Botox and dermal fillers is skin that scars easily and, since I still have tiny little scars all over my legs from varicose vein stripping over a decade ago – complete with dots from where the stitches went in – I closed my browser and closed my mind to it.

It’s for the best, really. Isn’t it funny how these things work? Some of the most beautiful women I have ever met are the septuagenarian and octogenarian ladies in my seniors’ yoga class; they truly have the faces they deserve, as the saying goes, with their inner beauty shining through. And although I’d love to look more rested – my eyebags are sometimes steamer trunks – and less crinkly, well, this is the face I have and, ultimately, the face I deserve. I raise my eyebrows a lot, I smile a lot, I make that “Kermit the Frog scrunch face” a lot, and my face reflects that. I’m going to be at peace with it and also, keep up with the retinol creams. Jesus, maybe some eye cream?

Outfit of the Week

This is probably my very favourite summer outfit of all time. I feel so cute in it, it makes me want to twirl around like a ballerina, or like my seven-year-old niece. I COULD do that without fear of traumatizing anyone, as it is a skort, albeit kind of a short one. I paired it with a yoga tank because even though I now have comfortable bras, I still like a shelf-bra tank on hot days. Sandals are Skechers, naturally.

It’s not every day my accessories match my outfit this perfectly! That bracelet was made by my friend Amy (HI AMY)!

Pandemic Reading

A Thousand Ships. In my very first semester at university, I took an introduction to classical studies, and our required reading was The Iliad, The Odyssey, and a few other Greek plays. It is very telling that I have never read them since, and, in fact, I couldn’t remember anything about them. I think I blocked them out. I have extremely low interest in men’s stories: I could not care less about mighty warriors and their conquests, and I definitely don’t want to read about all the capturing, enslaving, and raping said conquests. However, I was intrigued by this book which explores the Trojan war through the eyes of the women. I did not love this book, but I did like the different point of view, and I did like to see women portrayed as something other than crazy, long-suffering, and vain.

When No One Is Watching. This book is marketed as a psychological thriller, but it doesn’t really read as one – at least for the first two-thirds of the book. It is more of an educational exploration of the practice of redlining and the dark, sad side of gentrification, with thrilling dramatic license. I liked this a lot as it is very mind-opening, and the end is thrilling and satisfying, but it’s not what I consider to be a typical thriller. Still, very much worth the read.

A Burning. Oh, this was so so good. I picked this up on the advice of Suzanne (HI SUZANNE) and it did not disappoint. It follows the story of a woman who is accused of aiding and abetting a terrorist act in India, through the points of view of three very different people, all of whom are trying to rise up in the world. It is an absolutely chilling portrait of what people will do to make their way up the ladder, so to speak. I love books that have a realistic description of different places and cultures, and this book describes India – its economics, culture, cities and villages – so well.

I hope you are all enjoying the summer; we are doing our best to make it A Summer, after the disappointments of last year. Have fun, be kind – especially to yourself. xo

My Own Mask Mandate; Sixty-Nine Weeks In

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The mask mandate in our city was officially dropped this week; when I went to the grocery store on Wednesday I counted six maskless faces. I will say I find it strange and startling to see actual faces indoors, which goes to show how quickly people adapt to their circumstances. After all, a year ago masks were still quite new, and now I feel strangely naked without mine.

I still wore my mask in the grocery store, and will continue to do so for a while. What can I say, I like to emphasize my eyes. I went to the post office and to pick up dog food, and I was the only person masked.

Also on Wednesday, we had a massive hailstorm which was not great for my garden, but if you are hale enough to garden in Calgary, you had better plant things that can deal with hail. Do you like what I did there? My flowers were pretty squished, but they have since perked up, and the veggies all seemed to survive for the most part, the zucchini, sadly, getting most of the damage. Well, you can’t keep zucchinis down for long, and hopefully I will still be stuck with a plethora of them at the end of the season.

I might be a little hesitant with the reopening of everything, but the boys sure aren’t. They are so happy to be able to do what I would consider very modest teenage things, like going to a movie (still masked) with their friends, and going to our fitness club. I feel like in the future we will see many theses and dissertations on the effects of the pandemic on the brains, behaviours, and well-being of all different age groups, and one thing I can say for sure is that, for my kids, being essentially cloistered for sixteen months gives a greater sense of gratitude for all sorts of fairly everyday things. They have been spending many hours at the club, working out and swimming, with plans to play badminton and bowl. We even shared an order of fries! one of them said to me, so thrilled with this tiny pleasure that it made my heart swell and break at the same time.

Well. I am happy for them, despite being somewhat nervous in general. Right now our Covid numbers are as low as they’ve ever been, but will that continue through the month, particularly with Stampede this week? Talk about super-spreader events; the Stampede is always a haven for germs. Also for pregnancy, divorce, STDs, and general debauchery. Maybe it will be different this year.

San (HI SAN) linked to this really great Atlantic article about the shift in the pandemic, personal choice and how it affects public health, and if you have ten or fifteen minutes, I encourage you to read it. It’s really smart and well-written, and also touches on things I have been wondering about, namely vulnerable groups and those who work several jobs to make ends meet. It also reaffirms my own personal mask mandate, even if the general one is dropped.

Outfit of the Week

It has continued to be hot and summery here; IT’S SKORT WEATHER, PEOPLE. God, I love skorts. This is one of the first that I ever purchased, and so it probably dates to 2015 or earlier. The tank top has made an OOTW appearance before, but never on its own.

Shoes, like all my flat non-running shoes, are Skechers. I have a tiny bit of a Skecher addiction, particularly of the Mary Jane variety.

Pandemic Reading

At Home. I love Bill Bryson’s work; his dry British wit coupled with incredible facts and anecdotes are unmatched! If you, like me, have ever wondered why we have salt and pepper shakers, of all the spices in the world, or how the modern house evolved – where did chairs come from? – this is the book for you. It focuses on the massive changes in day-to-day living in the nineteenth century. Let me tell you, the grimness of life in the Victorian age will make you grateful for the modern era. Maybe don’t read the section about how the modern bathroom came to be while you are eating, because the description of the sewer system in London, pre-mid-nineteenth century – when it was completely overhauled – is pretty gross. Having read The Body, I recognized some of the anecdotes in At Home, such as the discovery that cholera epidemics were connected with contaminated water, and how women’s health was dealt with (badly, very badly). Definitely worth the read, if only to pepper your loved ones with fun facts.

Good Neighbours. I enjoyed this kind of bonkers book about a neighbourhood gone totally…bonkers. It’s an illustration of how mob mentality works and things aren’t always what they seem. There’s an underlying theme about our environment and climate change, as the book takes place in the near future. It’s a very absorbing and thrilling read.

Wintering. “When everything is broken, everything is up for grabs.” This lovely book explores the concept of winter – figuratively and literally – and how to move through it, how to cope with, as Landslide, the seasons of your life. I suspect I would have liked this book better when it was actual winter, or when we were in the depths of the pandemic, but library holds come in when they will. Summer notwithstanding, this book is a beautiful tribute to listening to and living with different seasons of our lives, particularly the difficult winters.

This made me feel like the author was talking about me, personally: “…we make and remake our stories, abandoning the ones that no longer fit and trying on new ones for size.” Also: “That’s the gift of winter. Change will happen in its wake, whether we like it or not. We come out of it wearing a different coat.” Isn’t that a beautiful sentiment? “When I started feeling the drag of winter, I began to treat myself as a favoured child: with kindness and love.” Wouldn’t it be nice if, when we started to feel down, we treated ourselves with kindness and love?

On that note, I hope your week is full of kindness and love, and that you treat yourself like a favoured child. xo

Refreshed and Rejuvenated; Sixty-Eight Weeks In

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Thank you all so much for weighing in on last week’s question! I am cautiously optimistic and hopeful, and also clinging to my mask collection.

I did take advantage of the Big Reopening in one way, and that was to visit my parents for four nights. It’s interesting; I am a person who thrives on routine and yet having a pandemic-length constant day-to-day routine has worn me down mentally. Just like everyone else, it has been a real drag to just keep trudging along, day after day, with nothing to really look forward to and no enjoyable distractions.

All of which is to say, after four nights up at the lake, with beautiful weather and even a birthday celebration for one of my nieces, I feel like an Entirely New Woman. I am so refreshed and rejuvenated! We spent so much time on the boat, swimming, paddleboarding, being outside, and drinking margaritas; it was absolutely the mini-vacation I needed. My parents have hardly seen us in the past year and a half, and it just felt So Good.

It’s back to reality this week, but I feel like I can really face reality once again! A while back, I was listening to a guided meditation, and the words Finding Magic in the Mundane came up. I have been thinking about that a lot; given that we have had sixty-eight weeks of Mundane, I think that lately it’s been hard for me to Find The Magic. My ability to Find The Magic has been fading, without me even realizing it. “Find The Magic In The Mundane!” I would say to myself, and then I would stare blankly at the pile of laundry or the dishes in the sink or the groceries to be put away.

In any case, I’m excited about a fresh new week, even the mundane parts. I have tiny little peapods in my garden, tiny little zucchinis and tomatoes, the lettuce and kale are going wild, and the daylilies and roses are all starting to bloom. Life is good. Maybe even magical.

Outfit of the Week

This week’s outfit is slightly ridiculous, but it’s not every day you see a thirty-three year-old inflatable Olympic Mascot while on your morning constitutional.

Remember Hidy?

I love my Good Vibes tank top, and those silly shorts are at least six years old, from Old Navy; I wear them only when exercising in very hot conditions. I actually wore them to swim in. It was hot enough for me to want to actually jump into the water, but I was wearing a bikini underneath and I worried I would have a wardrobe malfunction that would send my kids into therapy, so I left my shorts on.

Every once in a while, I need to remind my kids that I’m a good swimmer and I need to remind myself that it’s fun to get my hair wet.

Pandemic Reading

Animal. This was one of the darkest, most disturbing books I have ever read. It is ROUGH. I cannot say I liked it, but I found it compelling. I wanted to see how it ended and, well, it’s DARK. The book synopsis said that it follows a woman who goes from prey to predator, and that’s sort of accurate, but also not.

I hope you all have a beautiful and magical week, even if it is mundane. xo

Summer’s Open?; Sixty-Seven Weeks In

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Sixty-seven weeks! My friend Steph (HI STEPH) mentioned that at some point soon, she would stop using “Coronavirus Chronicles” in her blog titles, as she has been doing for – probably – sixty-seven weeks, and it reminded me that I, too, must consider when to stop the weekly count. The problem is, when? Do I stop when the pandemic is officially OVER, as declared by the World Health Organization? Do I stop when it’s over in Canada? In Alberta? When I can go on vacation without fear of debilitating illness? What shall I do with this entirely optional and arbitrary rule that I have brought on myself?

Sixty-seven weeks into the pandemic, and it’s been a pretty exciting one in the Boyhouse, as the boys – all three of them – received their second vaccinations on the weekend. This happened a full two and a half weeks before I thought they would get their shots, god bless the good people at the Pharmasave down the street. That Pharmasave opened up in 2019 and it has been a godsend for this community.

I’m so happy we are all vaccinated because as of July 1 our province has declared us all “Open For Summer” which means, as far as I can tell, a total free-for-all in terms of health protocols. Um, guys? Can we ease into things here? I have already noticed that the maximum capacity for places such as Costco and Superstore have been increased, as both places felt uncomfortably crowded to me this week, although people are still masked and, as far as they can, distancing. I personally do not feel ready to attend any venues, indoor or outdoor, that are crowded and possibly maskless.

So here is a question for my American friends: if your state is “open” and all the mask mandates and other health protocols have been dropped, how are you doing? Are Covid numbers spiking or is everything…normal? I guess what I’m asking is should I expect a fourth Covid wave, or are things going to be okay?

In any case, we aren’t really changing our behaviour around here, except to visit with our vaccinated friends and family, which will be nice. I have no plans to, for example, eat in a restaurant or go to any place where there might be crowds (Stampede, I’m looking at you.) I will continue to mask up when I need to be indoors; you will have to tear my cute, outfit-coordinated mask off my cold, dead face. With that in mind, we are all ready to dive into summer, and we have ALSO been having actual summer weather, as in “non-Calgary” summer weather! We have had beautiful heat interspersed with a day of intense rain, and so the garden is very happy and so am I.

Outfit of the Week

Probably the very best thing about living where I do is the proximity to the Rockies; there is so much beauty right on our doorstep.

My soul sister Janet (HI JANET) and I went on a fairly epic hike last week; it was a total of about 13 kilometres, with about 950 metres of elevation, and it felt like most of that elevation was in the last kilometre. Hoo boy, that was a booty burner. Look at that view, though!

This week’s outfit is a hiking outfit, complete with hiking poles. I cannot recommend hiking poles enough for high-elevation hikes. Going up is one thing, coming down is another. I don’t think I could have done it without my poles, I would still be up at the top. Even with poles, I slipped and fell on my aforementioned booty a couple of times on the way down.

It was a pretty hot day, and I love this old tank from lululemon for outdoor activities, as it is fairly high in the neck so as to protect that delicate skin in the chest area. These tights are technically running tights, but they are great as they have side pockets to slip a phone in for easy photo-taking access.

If you’re hiking in the Rockies, good boots and socks are a must. It seems weird to wear heavy wool socks with heavy hiking boots on a hot summer day, but both are a must for blister prevention and ankle support on rough, uneven terrain.

Pandemic Reading

A Very Punchable Face. This was a pretty fun read. Some parts dragged but mostly it was interesting to read about Jost’s life going from Staten Island to Harvard – he was in the Harvard Lampoon – to becoming a writer on SNL. He was very young when he started at SNL, like 22, which surprised me. There were lots of details about how he felt like he didn’t belong: as a child, at Harvard, at SNL. As Suzanne (HI SUZANNE) said, I could have done with a lot FEWER details about the many times he soiled his pants as an adult, although I could also have skipped that chapter, so caveat emptor. In general, it was pretty entertaining. The chapter on “notes from the censor” alone is worth the read. Oh, and he and Michael Che were in a match at Wrestle Mania and thanks to the people I live with, I actually understood that chapter and recognized all the wrestler names, at which time I stared into space for a while and wondered who, exactly, I have become. 

The Other Black Girl. Wow, this was one of the most original and unsettling books I’ve ever read. I read A Lot and I had no idea how this was going to go. It really asks the question about what POC give up to achieve success in a white world: does one go along to get along, or fight the power? Disturbing and engrossing. I really liked it.

As a privileged white woman, I believe it is my job to listen to and read about other people’s experiences in the world. It’s very common for white people to say “I don’t see colour” but what I am hearing is that this attitude is hurtful and dismissive to people of colour. Through my reading and listening I am learning about microaggressions and ingrained racism – most white people would deny racism, but I think there is more to it than that. I think there are generations of ingrained attitudes before us, and we need to listen to and learn from people of colour and what their lives are like on a day-to-day basis in a white-dominant world. This book really brought that home for me.

The Missing Treasures of Amy Ashton. I admit I nearly took this back to the library upon the reveal, in the first chapter, that the main character is a hoarder. No thanks. But I try to be an open minded person and so I kept reading. It’s a strange combination of charming, light mystery-romance, and grim and dark story about loss and undiagnosed mental illness. It’s weirdly satisfying but also kind of depressing. Throughout the book I kept thinking in my Mom Voice “MAKE BETTER CHOICES.”

Happy start-of-summer, everyone! I hope you have a beautiful week. xo

Summer Solstice; Sixty-Six Weeks In

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All By Myself, No More

As of Tuesday this week, the boys will be finished their final exams and this very strange school year will be in the rearview mirror. I am always pretty Landslide-y in June – another year gone, children get older, I’m getting older too – and even though it was been a very weird year, I am really feeling it. In fact, I might be feeling it more since these are my kids’ HIGH SCHOOL YEARS, they should be enjoying them to the fullest, and they are, but the “fullest” has different meanings during a global pandemic. Also, this time next year, my oldest will be 18 and have graduated, which fills me with ALL KINDS of feelings, but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

Speaking of my oldest and the high school experience, he mentioned that he met a girl at school, and she’s really funny and nice. He was talking about her quite a bit, and so I said in that Teasing Mom Voice we all have, Oooohhh, is she CUTE? He replied yes, with a smile, and then stopped. “I mean, I think so. I haven’t actually seen her whole face.”

So there’s that.

The final exams this year, like last year, were “non-jeopardy,” meaning that they can boost final marks, but they cannot lower them. Both of my boys were going into their finals with high marks, so you can imagine the level of motivation around here, knowing that no matter what happened on the exam, their transcript marks would remain high. I was trying to encourage them to give it their all, it’s good practice for the future, and who knows, maybe your mark will go up a percentage point or two, but you know what, I give up.

So the boys are home and my husband has been back working from home and will be for the next while, and my quiet house is quiet no more; we are back to Everybody Is Home All The Time.

What An Age We Live In

Fun fact about high school teachers: they have fewer in-class hours than teachers in younger grades, and so to satisfy that part of their union contract, the school institutes mandatory tutorials during the exam break, which was last week and this week. Final exams are taken in the mornings, each day a different subject, and then in the afternoon are these mandatory tutorials. The tutorials are mandatory even after the final exam in that subject has been written, and in classes in which there was no final exam, such as phys ed. It was widely acknowledged BY THE TEACHERS that no actual work would be done in class, no new learning, and one teacher even shook his head “no” as he told the students that tutorials were mandatory. I told the boys that of course they didn’t have to waste their time going to the tutorials, unless they needed extra help, just study at home – insofar as “studying” was required – and found out later that they were in the minority in their friend group. Almost all of their of their friends were forced by their parents to go. Oh well. I’m not a regular mom, I’m a cool mom.

I might not have been so cool had I known I would be inundated with messages from the school about their truancy. The very first day of exams, after one son had written his science final and the other spent several hours at home studying for math, my phone pinged with PowerSchool notifications that the boys were marked unexcused for their afternoon classes. Including, for my younger son, gym. Then both my husband and I received emails from the school and I even got a PHONE CALL on my landline to inform me of their absence. This continued throughout exam break and honestly, I understand that it is part of the job and attendance is important for optimal learning outcomes but my god.

I do genuinely believe that there is merit in forcing oneself to perform arbitrary functions, even when those arbitrary functions are ridiculous and meaningless, because we live in a society and occasionally such things are required of us. For example, sanitizing your hands upon entering a store in the mall, even though you JUST sanitized your hands three minutes ago upon entering a different store and have touched nothing since. It’s important to model good behaviour and signal your citizenship in society, even to the detriment of your skin and possibly your microbiome.

However. It’s June. The boys have been really, really great for this whole school year. They have been engaged in their classes, even when bouncing between online and in-class learning, they have not missed a single class, they have kept their marks higher than I could have even hoped for. I am going to stand by my possibly shoddy parenting decision and in any case, the tutorials are – I hope – wrapping up this week, which will cut down on the truancy notifications I receive. Also, I am really glad this technology did not exist when I was in high school.

The Same Nicole You Know And Love, Now With Superpowers

On Saturday I got my second Covid vaccine shot, and my superpowers are officially activated. If a certain section of the anti-vax people are correct, I am now magnetic, and will possibly be dead in two years! Well, I had a good run.

I am so grateful to be vaccinated, I am so grateful for all the hard-working people who have made this happen, and I am really hoping that we will never walk this path again. Mostly I am just looking forward to being my normal huggy self, without feeling like we are all vectors of disease.

For those who are interested, as per current recommendations I received the Pfizer vaccine, as a follow-up from my Astra Zenica. In terms of side effects, I was extremely tired and sleepy afterwards. I mean, I took a NAP on Saturday afternoon, which never happens, and then I went to bed at 8 and slept until 6:30. I wasn’t my usual peppy self the next day, but I was perfectly functional; this morning I have a bit of a sore arm and nothing else to report.

The Long March To Winter

Today is Summer Solstice! The great thing about getting up at four-something in the morning at this time of year is that I can still see the sunrise and by the time I start my yoga practice, it’s fully light outside. The sun sets at ten o’clock, and did you guys know there is a ten o’clock at night? I never see the sunset, is what I’m saying.

I knew a guy who would say on Summer Solstice that every day is getting shorter until we are back to winter again, and sir, that is a true statement but can we just enjoy the moment? I think about it every Summer Solstice. Well, we’ve started the Long March to Winter again! It cracks me up every time.

It’s been warm enough that I open the windows in the morning, to cool the house down and to listen to the birdsong as I practice yoga. There are magpies nesting in the neighbour’s tree, which means that there will be long stretches of musical chirping punctuated by the staccato cadence of magpies screaming. It’s quite unsettling, not unlike listening to classical piano music with sections of hard-core Eminem, complete with fake gunfire and many, many f-bombs. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy both classical piano music and hard-core Eminem, just not at the same time.

Outfit of the Week

Speaking of summer! We have had some really lovely weather and so I’m pulling out all my favourite lighter pieces that I have had for many years but don’t wear out because, let’s face it, summer is fleeting and these pieces do not get to see the light of day very often.

This is a teaching outfit; my teaching days are going to be non-existent this summer, sadly. Today is my last registered class at the community centre, to be continued in the fall, and my other class is on pause for the summer, and I’m unsure when that will continue. So a teaching outfit to celebrate the last teaching day for a few months! Pastels are usually a no-go for me, but I like myself in blue, and I like the darker blue tank underneath. My favourite mala goes perfectly with this outfit, and one of the best things about summer? No socks!

Pandemic Reading

Revival Season. This follows a young girl whose father is a revivalist evangelical preacher; during Revival Season the family travels around the southern US so he can save souls and heal people. The girl witnesses her father commit an act of violence, which has massive repercussions for the family and for her own faith. At the same time, she discovers she has healing powers. I enjoyed this book – didn’t LOVE it, but I enjoyed it – and it is written in present day, which is important. I have since discovered that the idea that women are inferior and subservient to men is still widely accepted in the evangelical community TODAY, which is disturbing, and is a major theme in this book.

Truths I Never Told You. Ugh, this book was NOT for me. It was my own fault, right on the cover the author is compared to two well-known authors whose writing I do not care for. I found the first-person narrative to be so overwrought, the dialogue stilted, the plot super-contrived. One of my pet peeves about writing that supposedly takes place in the past is the application of today’s views on yesterday’s beliefs. It feels very unrealistic to me, as did the journal entries that are used as a literary device to advance the plot – usually I like that device, but these journal entries were SO ridiculously over the top with drama. Anyway, not for me.

American Dirt. I was about a third of the way through this book when my friend Nicole (HI NICOLE) alerted me to some troublesome controversy with regards to the author. It didn’t totally colour my reading experience, but it was certainly in the back of my mind while reading. Honestly, I don’t know what to think: the morality of writing a work of fiction about a culture and experience that is not the author’s is really beyond the scope of my blog. The author discusses her hesitations about writing the book in the afterword, and does mention that her own husband was an undocumented immigrant, hence her interest in Central American migrants.

Anyway, controversy and debate notwithstanding, this book is excellent. While I don’t think anyone who supported the 45th president and his anti-migrant views would read this and change their minds, I think this book humanizes the migrant experience. This incredible book sheds light on the horrors of the migrant experience, shows how desperation leads people to grasp at any chance, no matter how dangerous, to seek a new life. It is breathtaking, and heartbreaking, tragic and hopeful.

Happy Summer Solstice, friends! May you enjoy our ever-shortening days this week! xo