And I try, oh my god do I try, I try all the time

…in this institution.

I’m not exactly praying for a revolution, per se, but honest to god, yesterday I took the quadruple whammy: time change, Mercury still in retrograde, the eve of the full moon, AND after somewhat of a hiatus, my Ladies’ Holidays arrived. What timing. There is nothing we can do about moon phases and planetary movement, there is little to be done about Ladies’ Holidays, and here we still are, many years after the war ended, still pretending that Daylight Savings is indeed saving daylight and energy. We all spring forward like zombies, for absolutely no reason whatsoever except that we have to do it, or we will be an hour late to everything in society.

THERE IS NOT ACTUALLY MORE TIME IN THE DAY. We do indeed have more daylight, but that is due to the revolution of the earth around the sun, not moving the clocks forward.

Anyway, I am trying, OH MY GOD DO I TRY, to not make Time Change Week a self-fulfilling prophecy, I am trying to be positive and pretend like it’s any other week, I’m trying to look on the good side – wow, it sure is light out when we are eating dinner! – but I just spelled prophecy with an F and well. Well.

It’s going to be a very hectic week, in any event. I have a meeting at the school for my younger son’s sailing trip, which leaves in three weeks. I mean, hopefully. Given that we can’t do anything about external circumstances. The point is, there is actually a parent meeting! We also had a last-minute fundraiser because – and this may or may not surprise you – the poinsettia fundraiser did NOT do as well as expected. Isn’t that strange, in the middle of a recession in Alberta, people aren’t clamouring for $40 arrangements right before Christmas. I cannot believe it either. Well, I leaned in HARD to this fundraiser as it was for Co-Op grocery and gas station gift cards; this is an actual useful fundraiser for things people might actually want. Maybe we can all use our Co-Op gift cards to stock up on toilet paper. They had it on sale this weekend.

Anyway, my lovely friends were more than generous for this fundraiser; I instantly blew past the minimum I needed to sell and ended up nearly five times that. My hope is that this fundraiser will be as wildly successful for everyone as it has been for me, and that the administration will take note and, perhaps, come to the conclusion that gift card fundraisers are the way to go, and the poinsettia one can stay in the trash where it belongs. Technically the future doesn’t matter for me, as I won’t be doing this ever again, but I like to think of myself as benevolently hoping for the next generation of sailing-trip parents.

God bless you all, for your tips about bra shopping and fitting, and sharing your similar anguish and bust-related woes. My friend Megan (HI MEGAN) sent me directions on how to measure myself for a bra, and let me tell you this: the size of my old bra was so incredibly wrong, it was startling. In fact, it was such an odd size that it qualified as a “specialty” one, which is how I ended up deciding to visit the specialty shop just across the street from the studio at which I teach. I had a class Friday at lunch, but I gathered all my mental strength and zipped over to the shop, giving myself a nice window of time before class. Or, at least, I thought it was a nice window of time.

When I related my tale to the lady at the shop, she tilted her head and said that at that store, they don’t do such pedestrian things as measure for bra size. As I looked at her, confused, she just said that I would try on bras until I found one I liked and that fit. Ooo-kay. She brought me the size I thought I was, which did not fit. Then she brought me another one, and it did not fit. Then she brought me the size of my old bras, and, unsurprisingly, that also did not fit. Twelve bras later, all different sizes and styles, none of which was even close to fitting, I found that I had ran out of time and had to get to the studio.

God, I hate wasting time. More than anything else, that makes me crazy. Well, it’s probably a good thing anyway, since the only thing I hate as much as wasting time is wasting money, and every single one of those bras were over $150. At one point – probably around Bra Eight – I would have paid all that and more just to end this hellish shopping experience and leave with something to show for my efforts. I guess on the bright side, if I’m going to wear the wrong size bra, at least I can do that with the ones I have in my lingerie drawer, at no additional expense.

I left the store with my self-esteem somewhat in tatters. I mean, who can’t get a bra that fits at a specialty bra store that specializes in hard-to-fit sizes? Me, apparently. I think I’ll try a non-specialty store in the hopes that I am not as special as I think I am.

Well, I tried. Oh my god, did I try.

Comments

  1. I’ll have that song in my head all darn day. THANKS!
    I’m glad the second fundraiser went well. Hopefully, the trip will go off without any issues. I’ve heard of a lot of people canceling flights, though. We have a local friend whose daughter is in Paris with her class, and they’re having a lovely time. No one else is there; it’s empty.
    Bra shopping is as bad as bathing suit shopping. I find what I like and buy them in several colors; basically, I’m a bra hoarder.
    Have you ever been to Soma? They do measure you and are usually very helpful. Also, not. $150.

  2. Your specialty bra shop must be a sham. Like, a front for something. Or maybe it’s the set of a hidden camera show, and they were waiting for you to let loose a stream of frustrated cursing before putting you on TV? The only reasonable explanations.

  3. How can they “fit” you if they don’t measure?! And I have NEVER met a bra that was worth $150. Suz is not wrong – bra shopping is right up there with bathing suit/jeans shopping.

  4. So glad they came up with a decent fundraiser. And I hope the parent meeting gives you all the infoyou need.

    OMG the bra shopping sounds dreadful. I agree with Gigi, if they are a specialty shop why do they not measure? Wasting time is the absolute pits. Are the bras lined with gold pieces to be so pricey? I assume not because how unconfortable. If we were smart, we would all open a full service bra shop. We could call it ‘Bras by Bloggers.’ I mean I find our group that hangs out here to be fairly supportive. Wink wink.

  5. I agree with other commenters that it’s worthwhile to persevere & find a store that does measure. The one you visited shouldn’t even be in business! I’m in Ontario and was finally convinced a few years ago, to go to a store called Change – they fit you and I came out with comfortable flattering bras that I love. They can be pricey but the store has sales, or sometimes buy 2 get 1 free. And 3 high quality bras = 2+ years for me, so if I have to spend a few $$ and a couple of hours – It’s worth it. Good luck with this & your youngest’s trip!

  6. bibliomama2 says:

    Suzanne is on to something about that bra shop – it takes more than a wish and some pixie dust to find a well-fitting bra, not sure why they think they’re too good to wind a measuring tape around your girls. And I disagree that no bra is worth 150 dollars, but I have enormo honkers that need some serious support, so I’m in a different target market.
    I’m in the same boat with this week. I nearly lost it on two teachers yesterday – one I usually love! And my husband ate all the chips and didn’t put them on the list and then Eve asked me to pick her up after rehearsal and bring home her two friends, one of whom is stick-thin and needs a constant supply of calories. And I had just been grocery shopping but didn’t buy chips because I THOUGHT WE ALREADY HAD SOME. I took them to Wendy’s and Matt slept at work last night (kidding. But it was a near thing). Fuck the evil motherfucker who came up with DST and fuck the evil motherfuckers who perpetuate it, I’m moving to Saskatchewan.

  7. “benevolently hoping for the next generation of sailing-trip parents.”

    I pushed the coop cards at school council and hope they do better than those plants-that-will-not-be-named, in the interests of next year

  8. I’m not having trouble getting to sleep on the new time, but I’ve slept late every morning this week. This makes it seem as if there’s less time in the day.

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