Every few weeks for the past couple of months, my husband has been travelling to check on the progress of the enormous renovation of our vacation home, and to meet with all the various contractors and so forth. Last week the boys had two days off of school, and so my older son accompanied him on his latest trip, leaving me and my younger son at home with Barkley.
This might seem like an ordinary thing in your house, but believe me, such a thing has never happened before. Other than one or two school-related trips, the boys have never been apart, and I have to say that it was really lovely to spend some one-on-one time with my younger son. Other than an hour or so here and there, I have never actually had true, extended, one-on-one time with either child since my youngest was born, and he just turned sixteen. We had such a fun couple of days together, both doing our own things and also doing things together. In total we had two nights where it was just the two of us, so we each chose a special meal for dinner, and we both ended up choosing Middle Eastern-style food. He chose homemade shawarma and falafel, and I chose TAKEOUT. This may also seem like an ordinary thing in your house, but believe me, it is not in mine.
I think the last time we got takeout was for my birthday in April, unless you count the time in early August, when we had just returned home late in the evening from our road trip, and my husband dashed out to A&W because we had no food in the house. I like a Beyond Meat burger just fine, but it doesn’t feel like a treat or a joyful gustatory pleasure, which is my goal for most dinners, truly. My son and I talked for WEEKS about what we would order and I had been thinking about the takeout place for MONTHS and you might think, from that statement, that maybe I should get out more and actually order takeout more frequently, and you might be right. If I did that, though, it would be less of an event.
God, this was so good. I got “The Mouh,” an eggplant/ zucchini sandwich, along with the dip sampler which included eggplant-based dips, and it wasn’t until after I had talked to my son about how much I love eggplant and I wish I had eggplant more often, that I realized what I was saying in terms of teen speak, and that he was just silently nodding and probably dying inside. That felt a bit awkward.
Eggplant aside, we also watched Top Gun together, which, as many of you know, is one of my favourite movies of all time. It reminded me of the collaborative blog my friends Hannah and Allison and I wrote, so long ago (HI ALLISON HI HANNAH). My favourite post from that blog was Life Lessons From Top Gun, and I just realized that I wrote that OVER SIX YEARS AGO, where does the time go. God, I love that movie. My son and I spent a lot of time making the hand gestures utilized by the ground crew (three, two, one, salute), and randomly quoting dialogue. Negative, Ghostrider, the pattern is full. He’s cold as ice, no mistakes. Talk to me, Goose. Bullshit, you can be mine. And you, asshole, you’re lucky to be here. Good times, and, as always, a good reminder that we are all lucky to be here.
I know it seems off-brand for me to really love Top Gun, but I do. I smile through the whole thing, from the first “bong, bong” sounds to the final Danger Zone credits. Several months ago I ponied up $1.99 to change the ringtone on my phone to the Top Gun Anthem, but somehow I cannot change the volume, which is Extremely High At All Times. Well, it means I never miss a call when my phone is in my bag, although I have had some odd looks from people around me when it starts blasting. Doo doo doo dodododododo.
Now it’s past Remembrance Day, which means that I started breaking out the Christmas mugs for my morning coffee, and putting out the Christmas-themed tea towels. I have been using my Christmas notepad for groceries, wearing my Christmas bracelet, using Vanilla Candy Cane-scented foot cream, and everyone has been washing with festive-themed soap since the beginning of the month. The weather forecast is fairly decent so I am hoping that my husband will start the outdoor decorations, and if you thought our Halloween display was fun, just you wait. All I’m going to say is that we have a few new additions this year that I’m dying to show you.
I always buy the kids nice Lindor Advent calendars, and I always think it would be nice to have my own, non-chocolate one. There are so many lovely calendars out there – the Body Shop has a gorgeous one – but I really cannot bring myself to a) spend upwards of $75 and b) spend upwards of $75 for a bunch of STUFF when I am trying to have less STUFF. I like the idea of consumable daily things, but I didn’t want a candy-related one, and then I saw Swistle (HI SWISTLE) link to a tea advent calendar that was, unlike many tea advent calendars, extremely reasonably priced. This calendar featured Pukka tea, which is my very favourite, and upon investigation, I discovered it was all sold out in Canada. Womp womp. I ordered another tea calendar that was reasonably priced – $20 – and it has arrived and I am disappointed. Over half the teas are green and black teas, which I do not, as a rule, enjoy, as I’m strictly an herbal tea kind of girl.
Well, I shall try to be open minded. Maybe they will be the most delicious thing ever. Maybe I will start drinking black and green tea instead of my usual ten cups of coffee in the morning. I cannot see it happening, but as I say to the kids, it’s good to try new things, you just never know.
Pandemic Reading
Malibu Rising. Have you ever read a book and thought, this would be a blockbuster movie? That was my feeling as I read it, that this would make a really good movie. Wait – is it optioned for a movie? I am always the last to find out about it. Anyway, this is a highly entertaining, don’t-overthink-this kind of book that was fun to read: four siblings who have gained fame and fortune through surfing throw an annual party. There are secrets! And Old Hollywood-style themes! It’s set in the early 80s, and the clothing and hair details are very fun, for those of us who really remember that era.
One, Two, Three. This was a really interesting read: an environmental disaster precipitated by a chemical manufacturer has devastating effects on a town and its citizens. This is a story about the search for justice, but also a coming-of-age story featuring teen triplets, told from each girl’s point of view. Very well-written and more complex than meets the eye.
I hope you all have a wonderful week; happy halfway-through-November! xo
It is nice to have one-on-one time with the kids. You’ll have a year of it soon and that will be an upside, even as you miss M.
Beth has (or had for Noah) a tradition of taking each kid on a camping trip (Noah in the fall, North in the spring or summer) which meant I had a weekend alone with each kid, too. And they go see their grandmother for separate weeks each summer and North goes to sleep away camp most summers, so they’ve been apart plenty. Being five years apart and not the same gender may mean they aren’t as close as your guys, though.
That’s such a special thing, so much time with the kids on their own!
HI NICOLE. Oh I am sad about your tea calendar!! But I am so happy to hear about CHRISTMAS MUGS and CHRISTMAS HAND SOAP and CHRISTMAS NOTEPADS.
I was so disappointed BUT I think I will order the Pukka one when I can and save it!
I don’t think I’ve seen Top Gun all the way through. I never could get over Kelly McGillis’s bad posture hunching over Tom Cruise. It bugged me. I like the idea of a non-chocolate Advent calendar, but couldn’t tell you the last time we had an Advent calendar. Something to look for.
I think I’ve probably seen it enough for the both of us, Ally! The Body Shop has such a lovely calendar but SO expensive, and I feel it’s a bit extravagant and wasteful…but such a fun idea all the same.
You’re making me smile and laugh on a Monday. I like you so much already.
Top Gun is a movie I’ve never seen. And get THIS…My senior year in high school, I had a Top Gun movie poster on my bedroom wall. What a poser!
I almost bought a cheese advent calendar at the grocery store the other day. Ho, ho, ho!
I ALSO had a Top Gun poster in my room!! Twinsies!
That is SO cool!!
I love this post, especially your eggplant enthusiasm. How fun to spend some one on one time with your youngest! I am hopeful that your tea calendar will surprise you, in a pleasant way.
My poor son. I LOVE EGGPLANT SO MUCH.
I had a hard time figuring out your title – went back and re-scanned the post….then a slow “Oh I get it”…it must be a line from Top Gun”. (I have seen the move, but I never remember lines from a movie). I kept wondering who the asshole was. Time alone with one kid is so amazing. It was always a goal of mine but never accomplished – 4 kids, 1 parent meant barely getting the minimum done!
Hahahaha, yes, I wasn’t specifically calling anyone an asshole! But that is one of my favourite lines in the movie, which is followed by “Yes SIR”
Oh, how I loved one on one time with Man-Child! We always went somewhere, just the two of us, at least once a year. Now that he has a serious girlfriend (once we get past COVID, of course) I think those days might be over.
Oh, I didn’t know he had a serious girlfriend – oooooh! Maybe there will be a wedding in your future!
Aw… I love the mother-son time! Eggplant aside, it sounds awesome.
I like your Christmas spirit! My Christmas mugs don’t come out until the day after Thanksgiving, but I’ve been sneaking some Christmas things in as well- like peppermint scented soap in the bathroom. It’s funny how happy that quick whiff of peppermint makes me.
When the kids were little we had some fun advent calendars- the Lego ones were fun, and one year my daughter had one from Claire’s (with little nail polishes and stuff like that behind each door.) Now, however, the only one we have is the cat advent calendar- there are little cat treats behind each door. We did this last year, and of course the cats have no idea what’s going on, other than they get treats each day, but we enjoy it. Advent calendars are fun!
Now that you mention it, the kids had Lego advent calendars years ago – I think they were Star Wars. They were super fun. I kind of want one from Claire’s for myself now!
I am chuckling at your Top gun love. This catches me by surprise. I’m now considering sharing a video clip I have of my family playing sand volleyball on the beach a few summers ago. A wireless speaker was blaring our music and the same Top Gun song that plays in the beach scene came on. What? How bout that for timing?
I do enjoy time alone with the kids. Rare as it is. I’ve often had time with one girl thanks to dancing and many more times with both girls. Great memories. Coach works so much that I’m usually the college visit parent so I’ve squeaked out some time with the boys there. So glad you got to do that with younger son. I enjoyed your self reflection of the eggplant chat gone awry.
I’m interested in this book that should be a movie. Plus the One Two Three book.
Sorry about your tea. Maybe you can order the preferred one early next year.
Hilariously, the son I watched Top Gun with is doing beach volleyball in gym class this week (at an indoor “beach” volleyball place, we don’t have a beach, and if we did it would surely be too cold). I told him he should wear tight jeans and no shirt, instead of his gym clothes, hahaha.
I am going to order the tea calendar early and save it. Maybe after Christmas!
I’m thinking of getting a cheese Advent calendar (I think Sobeys here in Canada sells them) for my husband this year.
Last year I splurged for the kids and bought a nicer advent calendar, but I can’t decide which one to go for this year. I feel like if I go all out a few years in a row, I’ll never be able to get away with an ordinary Cadbury or PC-branded advent calendar again?!
See, that’s the thing. Once you get the nice calendar, can you go back? I don’t think so! I once bought my husband a beer advent calendar, that was fun.
It is nice to try new things; I hope your advent teas surprise you in a good way.
Yay for one on one time.
I NEVER would have guessed that Top Gun was a thing for you. Never. Thanks for surprising me!
Ha! I know! It’s the only “action” movie I actually like!
I am always tempted by advent calendars (particularly the tea ones), but then my practical side takes over and I think to myself, I could just spend $20 on tea I KNOW I already like instead of being disappointed I only liked half the tea in the calendar. Maybe I should just convince someone to buy it FOR me!
That’s exactly where I’m at, Sarah! I feel like I COULD HAVE JUST BOUGHT $20 OF REALLY NICE TEA but oh well.
I’m not sure if I am even worthy of commenting on this post! I lived under the flight path of that Top Gun school, and I liked the movie, saw it in the theater, when our city and everyone we knew was obsessed! But, I haven’t seen it since. You have convinced me that I maybe be remiss!
One on one time with children, and worthwhile take-out… those, I agree, are wonderful!
Natalie! You lived under the flight path! That is so cool! I just love the scenery in that movie – all the palm trees! – and you lived there! Amazing.
Food habits are so interesting to me! I’m someone who gets takeout more often than I *should* but I guess it’s different when you have four mouths to feed as opposed to just one!
I don’t think I’ve ever seen Top Gun! Is that crazy? I need to add it to my list to watch.
Yay for two books I’ve read! I gave Malibu Rising 4 stars and One Two Three 5 stars. Both were excellent!
I just love that movie so much! Part of it is nostalgia, but it’s just fun – don’t overthink it! Lol!
Oh how wonderful that you got to spend one-on-one time with your younger son and that you ordered takeout as a special treat.
I also chuckled at your Top Gun love (I have to watch that movie again – I think Tom Cruise is a top-notch actor, if weird in his private life apparently).
And I love that you’re into the holiday spirit… I love this time of year, but I usually don’t go overboard with decorations, but I look forward to the season all year.