Tell me now, baby, is he good to you? Can he do to you the things that I do?

I received an invitation for the school’s Volunteer Appreciation Tea.  I smiled happily until I realized that the date coincides with the next book fair, which I am running.  I cannot attend the Volunteer Appreciation Tea because I’m too busy volunteering.
Some days are just like that.
I have not been sleeping well lately and I am feeling very, very tired.  I’ve been waking up at my usual early time and I feel great for about two hours; then it all goes downhill.  I’m pretty much mainlining coffee by mid-morning.  My poor sleep is not helped by Mark’s barking, seasonal allergy-related cough, which apparently does not affect his sleep one iota, but keeps me up at night.  Also, I heard “I’m on Fire” yesterday, so last night I lay wide awake, staring at the ceiling while the following soundtrack looped through my head:
Did he go and leave you all alone, mmmm….What if that cough isn’t allergies?  Should I do something?…Sometimes it’s like someone took a knife baby edgy and dull and cut a six inch valley through the middle of my soul…What if it’s croup?  Croup probably sounds like that….At night I wake up with the sheets soaking wet and a freight train running through the middle of my head…But could someone have croup with absolutely no other symptoms?…Only you can cool my desire…Maybe I should get up and google croup.  No, that’s probably a bad idea.  Remember when I googled fifth disease and thought everyone had it?…Whoooooo I’m on fire…
Last night the boys had soccer for the second time since April 19, and it was actually quite nice.  My new goal is to not complain about freezing to death on the soccer field, and so last night I dressed up in five layers of clothing, boots, and gloves, and I felt quite comfortable.  The boys are both in teams with blue uniforms, and so the kids generally name the teams in a way that coordinates with the colour.  Jake’s team name, for example, is the Blue Berries.  One year Mark was with the Blue Bubble Gums, and last year they were both in the Green Geckos.  I happened to be listening in when Mark’s team was asked for name suggestions.  The first one out of the gate was from one of his teammates, who suggested the Burning Blue Balls.  The coach, a friend of mine, deserves everlasting credit for nodding seriously and saying, “Okay.  Anyone…else?”  Fortunately they went with another suggestion – the Blue Jays – so I don’t have to cheer for the Blue Balls. 
Since my run-in with the dog boarder-who-no-longer-boards-overnight-but-who-still-will-groom-my-dog-for-the-low-price-of-$80-plus-tip, I have been on the search for a new groomer.  Evidently this is a difficult task.  There is a place close to my house that has a two month waiting list.  To get my dog groomed.  Now, my hair salon also has a two month waiting list, but while I don’t mind making several advance appointments for myself, I would like a little more flexibility for the member of the family who likes to eat his own frozen fecal matter and roll in the dusty dead grass.  Maybe that’s just me.  So I found yet another place, which will take him next week, and I’m only slightly unnerved by the fact that I need to have a consult with the groomer.  If this consult is more detailed than “give him the kennel number 3 cut” I am going to just give up and lock myself in the bathroom with a bottle of wine for a while.  Maybe it will help me sleep.

Comments

  1. I would have loved it if the team name became Blue Balls – I’d make a sign and everything. #Awesome

  2. That would have been hilarious to shout for Blue Balls.

    A waiting list for a groomer? That’s insane.

  3. GO! NADS! GO! NADS!

    Thanks for getting The Boss in my head. 🙂

  4. Remind me to tell you what username Angus ended up with for Webkinz World. I believe lack of sleep was involved in that one. I have trouble sleeping during seasonal transitions – but maybe that doesn’t apply – is it actually spring in Calgary yet? 🙂

  5. Jacqueline says

    I am heading to the soccer field later today…and tomorrow. This time I’m bringing mittens. My boys are Red, so no Blue Balls, but it’s very appropriate for Calgary. Next year indoor sports! This is our first Spring here and it has been full of learning opportunities for us.

  6. Nan | WrathOfMom says

    BLUE BALLS!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA!Ew. Poopsicles.

  7. Never google sickness. Especially at night. Glad to hear you were warm. Good luck sleeping.

    LisaDay

  8. The Blue Balls would have been funny! Can you imagine?

    Thanks for linking up today!

  9. Oh man that would’ve been funny blue balls … can you imagine shouting that! HA love it!

  10. LOL, the “burning blue balls” Kids say the funniest things!

  11. That coach deserves a medal for keeping a straight face. I would have lost it completely. I’m about to lose it now just thinking about it.

    Also, I’m hoping I can somehow encourage Klaw to suggest this as a team name one day…

    visiting from Let’s Bee Friends

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