Oh, Blanche

Rue McClanahan died! I always secretly thought that I would be like a non-slutty Blanche Devereaux when I am old: reeking of Chanel Number 5, making suggestive jokes in response to normal conversation, wearing support stockings and bright lipstick.

Query: have I already turned into a non-slutty Blanche Devereaux? I thought I had a few more years. In any case I’m not wearing bright, loose fitting but cleavage revealing tops, and I shall NEVER wear stockings with open toed shoes.

I don’t know what this says about me, but I loved the Golden Girls. I’m not sure what about four seniors living in Florida appealed to ten-year-old me, but I sure did love it. If it was on right now, I would probably watch it, if it were not for the inevitable ridiculing I would endure from my husband.

I have much, much more to say about many topics – not just my childhood conviction that I would be Blanche Devereaux – but I have been unable to write anything this week, given that I have been busy, busy, busy. Doing what, you may ask. In addition to the Scholastic Book Fair that I have been helping to run, there has been soccer, and my nemesis, soccer scheduling, and I need to leave the house in fifteen minutes for a kindergarten orientation, at which I am supposed to welcome the parents and remind them, ridiculously, not to jaywalk, but to use the crosswalks safely. Jaywalking – and parking illegally – is actually a significant problem at our school, one which leads to heated discussions and calls to bylaw officers and, once, an irate garbageman whose truck was blocked by all the illegal parkers. Is anyone still reading this?

* sound of crickets chirping *

Now I’m going to go put on some bright lipstick and Chanel Number 5 and head out!

Comments

  1. Oh parking and school drop offs.
    Yeech.
    I used to have to tell parents where to park and to slow down and so one. It was one of the WORST parts of my job. And I taught junior high. So that’s saying something.

  2. i envy you your conviction of Blanche-ness. in Chanel No. 5, i’d feel like a drag queen.

    i think i always feared i was Dorothy, but she was the only one i could see much of myself in at all. so this Rose stuff always sat like a bad taco, making me wonder if they thought i was dumb or something.

    i’ve decided to embrace it, now. as you should embrace Blanche. ;)c

  3. Mrs.Mayhem says

    Love your description of older self. You absolutely should embrace your Blanche-ness; you’ll be the belle of the nursing home.

  4. I loved the Golden Girls too. Now that you point out how weird it was for a 10-year-old to love a show about seniors I wonder what was I thinking? At any rate I loved that show and still watch re-runs of it when I happen upon them. I loved Blanche the most. Sad.

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