One of the best things about aging is that I no longer care about being in style. I said this to my husband, who vehemently disagreed that this was the case, leading to an involved conversation about semantics. I maintain that having personal style and caring about how a person presents oneself is very different from being in style. I care very much about my own personal style, but as far as trends are concerned, I’m indifferent.
I’m sliding towards my fiftieth birthday not knowing celebrity gossip or who even the young celebrities are these days; my only exposure to new music is from Peloton pop rides, and I am solidly ensconced in styles that I like without regards to current trends. I can really, really relate to women who were wearing their hair feathered or mulleted in the late nineties, with frosted lipstick and blue eyeshadow. I hope I’m not there.
I think there is something to the idea that later in life a woman adopts a hairstyle that harkens back to her favourite time of life. I once mentioned to a hair stylist that I worried I was in a hair rut, always wanting the same old thing, and she said Well, look at Barbra Streisand! She’s had the same hairstyle for years, and she looks great. I was unsure of how I felt, being compared to septugenarian Babs, since I was about thirty-four at that time, but I embrace the comment in the spirit in which it was intended.
Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Not Quite In Style Edition
Forever In Blue Jeans
Up until last week, I would have said that the current, very in vogue style of barrel or wide leg jeans was only for the very young, but then my gorgeous friend Carolyn (HI CAROLYN) swanned into book club on Thursday wearing a pair and looking like a total fox, and so I stand corrected.
The key to styling those jeans, I think, is to counterbalance the voluminous legs with a crop top, a fitted, tucked-in tee, or a bodysuit, and to accessorize with a wide belt. Unfortunately for me, I am reluctant to call attention to my own personal belt area, and so this is a fashion I am not going to participate in.
I think the most universally flattering cut of jeans is the flare or boot cut with a nice chunky heel, but heels are not part of my daily life anymore, and so I will also sadly pass on this style as well. I find I look frumpy in a flare with flats, what can I say. Fortunately, I am in the I don’t give a fuck stage of fashion, and so I still embrace the wildly-out-of-style skinny jeans. What other pant can you wear tall boots with? I also appreciate that skinny jeans go well with long tops, which covers the exact spot I wish to cover up, namely my tum-tum.
My one concession to wide leg jeans is a meet-you-in-the-middle style, the boyfriend jean. I like them cuffed with ankle boots, or little flats in the summer.
Here’s a hot tip for all my fellow Canadians: go to Mark’s, as in the former Work Wearhouse. They have a great selection of Silver jeans, which are in my mind the best brand around. Silver jeans have so much stretch without getting stretched out, which is a remarkable feature for denim. They have so many different styles and cuts, and almost always there is some kind of BOGO deal happening at Mark’s. I’m not sponsored by Mark’s! I just love that store.
These Boots Were Made For Walking
Speaking of Mark’s, my younger son just bought his first pair of steel-toed boots. According to his somewhat-trend-aware brother, my son is in the height of fashion: the aforementioned boots are Timberlands, albeit the tan colour is now splattered with oil and grease. I also have Timberland boots – from Mark’s! – which look nice, Mom, but they aren’t exactly in style. Well, no, mine are a) black, not tan, and b) winter boots. They might not be the height of fashion, but I still think they are cute, and they are perfect for our long morning walks.
Cute, comfortable, grippy, warm, and waterproof, what more does one want from winter walking boots?
Entering My Elastic Waist Era
Many years ago, I was laughing at the Sears catalogue that described a particular style of pants as “pull on pants.” Aren’t we all pulling on our pants? Well, yes. Pull on pants became code for any clothing associated with the elderly, but just like everything else I have looked at judgmentally in my life, it has come back to haunt me. Here I am, pulling on elastic waist pants and loving them.
I bought these from Lululemon and they are quite honestly the most comfortable pants I have ever worn. I’m not even sure how to describe them: like sweatpants that look like actual dress pants would be the closest I can come. I think these would be the perfect travel pants; comfortable enough to wear on the plane, wrinkle-resistant and honestly, pretty cute. I wouldn’t showcase the elastic waist, but I wouldn’t be showcasing my waist anyway.
Maybe She’s Born With It
I have long been a proponent of drugstore makeup; in my mind Maybelline’s Surreal Falsies is the single greatest mascara ever invented, and I love that brand’s Ultimatte lipstick. I am newly a convert to another lip colour, thanks to my friend Sarah (HI SARAH), who brought Super Stay Ink Crayon Lipstick to my attention. Friends, this is a truly remarkable product.
The colour stays on for hours, HOURS, even after eating and drinking and even dabbing one’s mouth with one’s napkin. I’m not sure how it stays on after sexytimes, but I’m guessing it performs in that area as well.
It’s Asparagus Season, Motherfuckers
I am so excited that asparagus is in season and, relatively speaking, less expensive than other produce right now. “Less expensive” is a very general descriptor and in the not-so-distant past would have meant half the price that I’m paying now. However, in season is in season, and we are consuming the hell out of asparagus right now.
Something occurred to me the other day: when I was a kid we never had out-of-season produce. Whether that was because it was prohibitively expensive or just not available in the 80s, we would have never had, for example, strawberries in January. I wonder if we are starting to move in that direction now. In any case, we are moving into Garden Season, which is my favourite season! In the next few weeks I’ll be planting some hardy greens, and I cannot wait to be harvesting my own produce. Hopefully I’ll finish the grated zucchini I have in the freezer before zucchini season begins again.
Outfit of the Month
Earlier this month the girls and I went to see a string quartet perform ABBA songs, and we thought it would be fun to dress up in our most disco wear. When this conversation first came up I was excited, and then thought wait, I don’t HAVE any disco wear. Then I remembered the dress I wore for my husband’s retirement dinner, paired it with my dressiest boots, and headed out on the town.
To be totally honest I was worried the dress would no longer fit, but happily that wasn’t the case!
March is an exciting month for us, what with birthdays and our anniversary and the anticipation of Garden Season; this weekend my husband and I are going to belatedly go on a date – A DATE! – for our anniversary, which is going to be a Favourite Thing for sure. Did you have some Favourites this month? Tell me everything. xo
You are correct- having a personal style is quite different from being “in style.” I’m going to guess that your husband doesn’t even really know what’s in style right now (I know mine doesn’t) so, since you always look cute and put-together, he assumes you’re in style. I would take it as a compliment! And, your son’s comment is funny about your boots not being in style. My daughter will occasionally make comments like that (although recently I’m pretty sure she’s given up) and it’s kind of funny- do they think we actually care?
I’m VERY intrigued by these Lululemon pants. Comfortable- look like dress pants- HAVE AN ELASTIC WAIST… I may have to check these out.
Thanks for the bonus photo of Rex!
You should check out those pants – they are SO comfortable, I cannot even begin to tell you!
My son did tell me that I “always look awesome” so that was a nice balm for the soul!
Ooooh A Date!!! That sounds so fun Nicole!
Your skinny jean steadfastness has inspired me to embrace my own skinny jeans, loud and proud. While still envying all the hip kids with their wide leg jeans.
I am so excited for spring produce!!!! My in laws are coming for a visit so I shall find some asparagus heavy meals to feed them.
EMBRACE THE SKINNY JEANS! I mean, if you want to. I’m not trying to be bossy!
Yay for asparagus, bring it on!
I am a big fan of asparagus, too, but North doesn’t care for it and they’re home for spring break so we’re are having an asparagus pause in our menu planning.
Yay for North being home!!!
I love black, I love asparagus, and I love your style! You are rocking it, and I don’t really think it matters if you are in style or not, you look good. Isn’t that kind of how life is; you figure out what works after a while and that is kind of the direction that you go in or stick to? I have tried bangs several times because I want to look cute with bangs, but (1) I don’t and (2) they are WAY too much work, plus they never lay flat and I have to wash them and they get sweaty… so, finally after 40, I have told myself that it is okay to just have long straight boring hair because you know what, I don’t want to have to work too hard and so all of those other styles don’t work for me. (PS I also had the Rachel, a perm, and a pixie, none of which were great).
I only have one pair of jeans, and I think they are skinny adjacent. They are not super tight like a hipster, but they are tapered and you can wear boots over them. When they break down, I will buy whatever is around and does not hurt my waist and does not cost an arm and a leg, but I probably will not buy a cute pair of boot cuts that I have to wear heels with (ever again). I actually only wear jeans in the plane and in France, but if I can get away with athleisure, I am all over that. I would not wear plaid PJs in public, but I will rock some capris. Sorry, not sorry.
Wait wait wait, you wear jeans on the plane? That’s always where I wear my comfy pants. I guess it depends on the flight length though. Your life is so athletic generally, of course you wear athleisure! It only makes sense.
I have also had a Rachel, a perm, and a pixie! The pixie was the worst decision of my hair life. I modeled it after Madonna in her Papa Don’t Preach video, and never was a haircut less flattering. I have also had bangs and wow, are they a lot of maintenance!
Nicole. You must stop writing perfect blog posts.
I have so many things to say.
First, I WAS TAKING NOTES. You know I don’t do lipstick, but you have sold me on trying the lightest, nudest form of the
Second, perhaps TMI, but I have never heard someone else refer to it as sexytimes and that is part of our vocab, too.
Third, I have asparagus in our fridge and it will be part of our dinner tonight.
Fourth, the first jean/sweater combo. Shut the literal front door. You are a fashion ICON my friend.
Fifth, I will go to Mark’s. Promise.
Sixth, I look absolutely and utterly ridiculous in true skinny jeans. And all the big-bottomed girls said Amen with me.
Seventh, I bought a pair of yoga/dress pants at a thrift store (Joe Fresh brand). I am wearing them now and they are sheer perfection. They don’t ride up or down, they have slim, flattering pockets, and they make me look dressed up and rarin’ to go while I manage to feel like I’m walking out the door in PJs. Of course I will go to Superstore and find these pants no longer exist in the real world (one of the downsides to thrifting), but I am on the hunt.
SEXYTIMESSSSSSS
Elisabeth, do try Mark’s sometime! They have such a great selection and Silver is the most comfortable jean brand ever. I hope you can find those pants again, and if not, I hope those thrifted ones last you forever!
It was my husband’s and Middle Child’s birthday this month. But dang, March is a long ass month! My opinion on fashion is that folks should wear what looks (and feels) best on them. We are all different body types, so we can’t all wear the same fashion. I look ridiculous in high heels (think giraffe) and frumpy in long tops and I feel miserable in high waisted jeans. My go-to is boot cut jeans, black Skecher tennies, and a fitted t-shirt. As far as hair, I’ve had variations of the ‘Rachael’ since the early 2000’s.
I often think about the lack of variety in produce that we had growing up! We are so lucky today to have avocados, kiwi, and mango. AND everything year-round, for the most part.
Thanks for sharing your cute looks and product suggestions.
Happy birthdays! I had a Rachel from 1995-98 or so! I love how I look in heels and I love being super tall, as opposed to just tall, but I only bust out the heels on special occasions, and never a heel more than two inches these days.
Remember when oranges were only at Christmastime? I think of that often!
Cute outfits. While I adore boyfriend cut jeans I’ve not gone for the wide leg jeans I see around. People look downright silly in them. Yes I said it. Sorry not sorry. I’ll look for the lipstick. If I could only find the perfect color [mlbb] in a product that lasts I’d die a happy woman.
Ally, I saw this comment this morning and have been ruminating on mlbb all day. WHAT DOES IT MEAN???
Getting the right colour is tricky – anything that’s pink, or has blue or orange undertones looks bad on me. I have to look for a neutral, but not one that’s too light, not one that’s too pink, etc. So when I find a colour I like I stock up like the world is going to end (knock wood that that doesn’t happen for many many many many centuries to come)
I’m sorry, my bad. It means: My Lips But Better. I learned it years ago to describe the eternal quest for the perfect shade of lipstick.
Well you have opened my eyes, Ally, and now I’m going to adopt that! It’s a perfect descriptor!
I love March for all the things you mentioned – birthday (my husband’s), anniversary (our wedding) and asparagus!! Yes, it’s expensive, but it’s in season and that’s the best time to eat it. Also, watching my plants come back to life. Buds on the rose bush, leaves on the lilac bush and peony stalks are all starting to make an appearance.
Yes, to Mark’s! Great selection of jean styles and just the right amount of stretch to work with the “advanced aged” body 🙂 I purchased some “pull up” dress pants from Reitman’s that fit well. I’ve never been a clothes horse or style maven, but if I had to describe my current style, it would be “comfortable.” Not sloppy, more neat and tidy. I don’t want to feel like my clothes are angry with me, tight, irritating etc. when I’m wearing them.
Have a wonderful date!
Happy anniversary and birthday! Isn’t it wonderful to see those little signs of spring? We’ve had a lot of rain this past week and everything is greening up!
Oooh I love that description “angry with me, tight, irritating” – that’s exactly what ill-fitting clothes feel like. I am over having anything uncomfortable these days!
I love Mark’s too and they also have a great selection of undies and socks. I don’t think I’ve worn a pair of ‘non pull up’ pants since Covid, except perhaps for a couple of times when I couldn’t wait to get home and pull them down. Comfort is my go-to now with clothes and shoes. No more heels, love boots. I admit I peered closely at your asparagus pic and was glad to see “Product of Mexico”. 🙂
Pearl, I suspect that you, like me, are carefully checking produce labels these days! I’m looking forward to local veggies, as in my own garden.
Mark’s is such an underrated place for women’s wear!
Another great post Nicole! I’m with you as far as what’s ‘in style’; don’t really care, I just know want to feel comfortable and think that I Iook good (as I slide towards, gulp…70. How is that even possible?) I quit up on skinny jeans for a silly reason: I hate fighting to get them over my feet when I take them off! Also most get stretched out and since my own butt disappeared about 5 years ago, the last thing I need is saggy fabric in that area. Will never wear wide leg, but I found a nice middle of the road pair that fit perfectly. Best part is I found them tags still on ($95) for $18.99 in a thrift store.
Your boots are perfect – comfortable warm and they keep you dry. What more do you need? I am going to look for that lip gloss/stain as soon as I get home (does it feel like it moisturizes?) I am going to look for that lip gloss/stain as soon as I get home (does it feel like it moisturizes?) I struggle with the hairstyle thing. I wore mine short for a long time then grew my hair long enough to tie back when I run, swim etc. But I’m tiring of it. However my hair is SO straight & thick short is too much work. What to do..! PS you look cute & stylish in every single pic you share.
The lip colour isn’t really moisturizing, Pat, but I find the Ultimatte feels like a lip balm, and it IS more moisturizing, which is strange for a matte product.
I understand about the skinny jean/ feet thing! I always pull them off so they are inside out, which is weird now that I type it. Perfect jeans, and from the thrift store? That’s like finding a unicorn!
As for hair, sigh, it’s always a struggle I think. Short hair is so much to maintain though!
Jeans… You know how I feel, dear Nicole… I think if I’ve had a bodysuit then mayyyybe I’d venture out into the barrel territory but nope, so skinny jeans I wear.
March. March kind of sucked. It was long, somewhat cold, and my job is dumpster fire. I did see two performances in our theater- in Morristown. One alone, one with Lyra. What else… St Patrick’s day was nice, weather is a tad bit warmer but not as warm as I like it. I feel like a grouch and I think it’s because I need to go on spring break already. It’s April 11th… I may not make it, jus’ sayin’
Oh, you’d look great in a bodysuit with the wide jeans! That would be a fantastic look for you, I think. But you also look fabulous in skinny jeans. Well, and in everything, you always look great!
Gosh, your spring break is so late! Hang in there!
Nicole, you have the kind of style that I would call classic or timeless. You always look put together and beautiful. I LOVE your dress for the ABBA show! I hope you have an awesome anniversary date!
Thanks so much Michelle – you are SO sweet!
NicoleStyle4Ever! Yeah, who knows what the cool kids are wearing these days. I do kind of admire a good “stuck in the 80s” style.
Is the lipstick drying at all? If the answer is no, then I might just pick up a stick. I can’t stand regular lipstick, and I used to use lipstain, but whatever I was using was discontinued and I haven’t found anything that I like since then. Since I can’t wear eye makeup due to sensitivity, I’ve kind of given up on all other makeup as well. But it would be nice to put a pop of color on my lips sometimes.
It’s not drying, but it’s not really moisturizing either. I will say that the Ultimatte lip colour (all of these by Maybelline) goes on like a lip balm, and I have never had dry lips with it, even though it’s a matte product.
I am standing with you in solidarity about not caring about what’s “in style” anymore. I will also be holding on to my skinny jeans until the day I die. My legs are far too short to pull off anything wide legged – no matter what shoe I am wearing.
I may have to give that lipstick a try; but so far, I’ve not found anything that compares to my Covergirl Outlast.
Oh, you turned me on to Outlast – but they seemed to have discontinued the colour I love! I’ll have to check to see if there’s something similar.
I’m everyone’s eccentric aunt coming in and giving you and everyone in the comments a pep talk: ya’ll, wear whatever you like! Do you like how it looks? Wear it! Do you like how it feels? Wear it! It makes me a little sad when I hear statements about how certain body types can’t wear certain styles, or needing to hide areas of your body. Ladies, hitch up those skinny or wide leg or pull on pants and step out with pride! “Nobody cares, David!” = one of the best lines from Schitt’s Creek.
I love Aunty Sarah’s advice! And I also love Schitt’s Creek – that show was perfection!
Your ABBA outing dress is perfection!! You look amazing in it! I don’t care that skinnies aren’t in style. Someday they will be again and I will be ready since it’s all I plan to wear forever!
Have the best time on your date!! We have done several double and triple dates but still need to do a 1:1 date. Hopefully we can do that for our anniversary in May!
I love my skinnies and they will have to be pried out of my cold dead hands, along with my boots!
Happy Anniversary date, Nicole! You definitely have your own style! I love that lotus necklace and that picture of you with your hair scraped back–you look so balletic! And you and Rex always match.
I switched to pull-on work pants during the pandemic and haven’t looked back–they’re so comfortable and I never have to worry that my fly is open :).
I am with you on the Personal Style in lieu of trends. I think you are so cute in all your outfits; always a classic look that is becoming on you. Like, you’re perfect in my eyes!
Um, I’d forgotten about FROSTED lipstick and now it’s the only thing I’ve been thinking about while reading the rest of your post.
I remember trying that maybelline lipstick years ago, and for me, it was very drying, but it looks perfect on you. I might be extra dry though, so my body sucks up any moisture placed on it.
I bet the ABBA thing was delightful—did my little Canadian Dancing Queen dance the entire show? I HOPE SO!
FROSTED LIPSTICK!!! Will it ever come back? Maybe it’s already back in style, how would I know?
The Maybelline isn’t drying on me, but it isn’t moisturizing either – sometimes I’ll add a bit of gloss when the colour is still there.
Thank you, my sweet friend!
SKINNY JEANS 4 LYFE. I will not take any opinions on this. I love my skinny jeans and I am short so those wide-legged jeans just do NOT look good on my figure. Plus, that’s a NO to wearing some sort of crop or form-fitting top.
I need to get that lip color! I remember Sarah talking about it and now that’s TWO endorsements for it’s long-lasting effects. That’s what I’m looking for!
Stephany, I love them too. I love a long top and a pair of skinny jeans! I loved that silhouette back in 1985 when it was all giant tops and stirrup pants, and I still love it now!
If you try the lip colour let me know how it goes (PICK A RED, YOU LOOK SO GREAT IN RED!)
I very rarely wear lipstick, but I’m thinking maybe I should give this a try. I think it’s ridiculous to put it on and then it’s gone in 1/2 hour, so maybe this brand is the solution. I’m going to the drug store tomorrow for sure.
Those comfy pants! I wonder if i could find a pair I like. I need some structure to my pants, nothing too drapey, but these look like they could work. Maybe I’ll go to lululemon too…
Jeans…I love a boot cut, and I wear it with a low block heel (maybe 1 inch?). I also like a straightleg. I’m with Elisabeth on the skinny jeans, and her butt is smaller than mine.
I feel like when I did 23 and me that one of the results I got had something to do with smelling the asparagus smell when I pee after eating it. Can some people not smell that? TMI?
Is that true, that some people can’t smell it? I thought the asparagus pee was a universal phenomenon! Well, you learn new things every day. I had no idea!
I think you’d love these pants – I wear them with little boots that have a very low (3/4 inch maybe) heel, and I think they look good. They are the most comfortable pants – a little pricey but I have had lulu stuff that has lasted 15 years or more, so it works out in the long run.
You don’t wear lipstick? I had you pegged as a lipstick person for sure!
You really are one stylish woman, but yes, a good personal style rather than fadish. I think I have the same or similar Lululemon pants, which I mainly wear when I’m travelling. They are easy to sleep in on the plane and are easy to dress up with a nice top to go out. I have two pairs of wide-legged jeans. One of them is high-waist and cropped, which helps the look, I think. Enjoy your date, G and I had an anniversary date last weekend. We made it lunch though.
Happy anniversary to you, Melissa! I love that we have the same pants. I think they are the ultimate travel pant!
Love your style Nicole! I’m going to check out Mark’s because I need some new jeans. Even the ones I bought a few months ago are just NOT working. I’m not afraid of the skinny jeans either, they are a staple and bound to come back! Also have your tried the Spanx Air Essentials line? All elastic and beautiful material! I’d buy it all but instead wait for Christmas requests because it’s expensive but so so nice. 🙂
Anna, are we psychically connected? Because I saw an ad for those Spanx pants and wondered what they would be like! Well now I’m going to look into it!
I’m so glad skinny jeans are out of style. LOL. I was late to accept them and never really liked them. Now I can find boot cut again. I wear them with flats and have #noregerts.
I am struggling with jeans, though, because all of them have too much spandex/non-natural materials. I just 100% cotton. It is super hard to find. I blame skinny jeans for this trend. Also, it makes me think I should be better about thrifting because I’d just need to find some 90s Levi’s and it would solve my jeans problems.
You need to go thrifting with Elisabeth! She always finds the good stuff. Good luck on your quest!