In a very uncharacteristic move, last week I angrily unfollowed a Facebook account after a highly unsatisfactory and, for me, infuriating exchange. It is my general policy to not comment on anything I disagree with; rather, I merely scroll past or mute. It takes a lot for me to become upset enough to unfollow a page. This is not to say I have never done so – I certainly have – but it’s a rare occurrence.
Also last week I learned that some people have very strong negative feelings toward LED Christmas lights (HI SWISTLE, HI ENGIE). I do not share those feelings, and I don’t not share those feelings. I’m neutral on the topic, I suppose, although all of our lights are LED, so that would lead a person to believe that I am highly in favour. I just like lights, and as long as my husband, who is the purchaser of all things light-related, has our display up before December, I am happy.
But I think it’s important to able to have feelings about holiday-related things, or anything, really, and I acknowledge and support my friends in such discussions. If a person doesn’t like LED lights, then they should be able to have non-LED lights and enjoy them, I say, my eclectically vibrant lawn display notwithstanding. I support my non-LED friends in their endeavours, even if I only realized that this was an issue six days ago. I don’t share those same feelings, but I am HERE for you, friends.
I’ll tell you what I do have feelings about, and that is the song Last Christmas. I love that song. I love it in all its iterations, even the really weird ones that involve harmonicas and steel drums. I have an entire playlist dedicated to the original version and all its many covers. I love it unapologetically, and I am not ashamed to say I get hurt feelings every year, every single year, when the inevitable post about Whamaggedon, which involves gleefully AVOIDING any exposure to Last Christmas, comes to pass.
Listen. We all like what we like, we as a human race are not homogenous and we can enjoy different genres of music. I get it. I get it that what is a joyfully festive bop to me, what makes me sing and dance and feel like the Grinch after his heart grew three times and broke the little measurement box, is a song that is disliked by others. That’s fine! We like what we like. But what I’m saying is that just because I think that Paul McCartney’s Wonderful Christmastime is the worst holiday song ever written, that doesn’t mean I’m going to make up a game about it and post it all over the internet. Yes, the opening bars make my shoulders go up to my ears with tension and I wish I could rip off my own ears when I hear them, but I am not actively making fun of people who like it.
This leads to, of course, my angry unfollow. I know better, of course, than to engage in any kind of polarizing discourse on Facebook, but I found myself typing like Kermit the Frog, wondering if people hate joy and professing my love for Last Christmas. And the response to me, of course, was to lighten up, it’s just a fun little game.
And I should. I should lighten up. It is just a fun little game, it’s not a personal slight on my character, even if it does make me feel strangely bad about myself, like I’m some kind of Philistine kicking up her heels singing in the grocery store aisles. I know, I really do, that it is not rational, and has literally nothing to do with me; the people playing this game are not out to inflict pain on my emotional state. And yet. Feelings are feelings: some people feel strongly about lights, some people feel strongly about artificial Christmas trees, some people feel strongly about matching festive pajama sets, and I feel strongly about Last Christmas.
In my recent Ask Me Anything (I’m still accepting questions!) Suzanne asked: Outside of Grocery Carts Should Be Returned to Their Corrals, are there any hills you would die on? (HI SUZANNE, thank you for seeing me). There are a few, but one of them is that you shouldn’t yuck someone’s yum, including holiday music. To be honest, this is something I practice daily, and I struggle with sometimes, because I live in a house with people I love who eat meat.
Relatedly, Bijoux asked (HI BIJOUX): Is there any meat you miss? and the very simple answer to that is no. I absolutely don’t, and in fact, the more years that go by, the weirder and more repellent I find the whole concept. However, the men I love all love meat, and so I remind myself every day not to yuck their yums. It’s hard, and I don’t always succeed, particularly at this time of year when photos of turkeys in various stages of cooking abound, but I try.
Everyone is walking their own path, and I would explode with incandescent rage if anyone told me what and how to eat, and so I support them in their dietary choices, even if I disagree with them. And the fact of the matter is that every single one of us living on this planet impacts said planet in some way. I don’t eat our furry, feathered, finned friends, but I do eat grains and fruits and vegetables, and all those crops crowd out animal habitats and thus indirectly impact those innocent beings.
Of course, we all have value and bring positive impacts to the world, every last one of us, but the truth is that just existing negatively affects our environment, and, therefore, its animal inhabitants. No matter how environmentally conscious we may be, collectively we are damaging our Mother Earth. This is just a grim fact, and there is literally no solution except not to exist or, as in the movie I saw in the Sphere in Las Vegas, to be shipped off the planet via spaceship to a whole new planet which is just waiting for humans to fuck it up.
Let’s not do this. We are all just doing our best, hopefully, and my best includes not eating meat, but by no means does that make me, or any other plant-based person, morally superior.
But sometimes it’s hard to remember not to yuck someone’s yum. Did I mention turkey photos?
This brings me to another hill I will die on and that is that there are many sides to any story, and that people contain multitudes. I am always unpleasantly surprised to discover that a person whom I esteem as intelligent and broad-minded can only see people and situations in black and white and cannot see any other point of view other than the one they’ve entrenched themselves in. They cannot see why people might make decisions a certain way, or why people are the way they are.
Which brings me back to Last Christmas. Perhaps I am being close-minded about those people boasting about going all the way until the 24th without once listening to the happiest song on my holiday playlist. If I, a strident Bring Back Your Cart person can recognize that there are extreme extenuating circumstances in which that is occasionally not possible, surely I can cultivate a feeling of compassion and understanding for these people. Perhaps they had a romantic encounter one Christmas, and the next day that encounter was over, forever. Perhaps that romantic encounter was of enormous importance to them and yet, the following year, the other party failed entirely to even recognize them, indicating that the encounter was of minimal importance. Perhaps their heart had been, devastatingly, broken, and the only way they have found to heal this heartbreak was to search for community, for someone special, for someone else who shared such experiences. Perhaps this community all must avoid anything, but particularly a musical masterpiece, that reminds them of this incredibly painful period of their lives. Perhaps that is what Whamaggedon is all about, perhaps it is a community of people who do not want to be reminded of their hearts being given away, they are, we might say, once bitten and twice shy, and must keep themselves from such remembrances that are sparked via festive music.
Or perhaps they really are taking aim at me personally. Who can say.
Weekly Reading
The Girls From Corona Del Mar. You know the kind of book that you just sink into and then feel incredibly resentful about having to do anything that is NOT reading the book? That’s what this book was to me. What an incredible story of lifelong friends and their journeys. One of my least-favourite things in reading is when an author wants to highlight a social or political issue and is completely heavy-handed with it – but this book is the opposite of that. It showcases so many social and political issues in a way that is incredibly thoughtful and haunting. This book shows that we can’t ever really know a person totally, even with the deepest friendship, and that everyone is on their own journey. Now, for the funny part: one of the character’s mothers collects gnomes, so many gnomes, and is eventually beaten almost to death with one. I hope this doesn’t happen to me. This leads me into lots of content warnings for violence, death, death of a DOG, suicidal ideation, ideation about so-called mercy killing, the ethics around pregnancy, medical incompetence, child neglect, abuse, massive drug use, and the aforementioned gnome beating. That’s a lot of content warnings and normally that would make me steer clear, but not with this book. Despite all that, it’s such a beautiful and compelling read about friends, family, love, and moving through life as a terribly damaged person.
Lots of Candles, Plenty of Cake. I am kind of neutral about Anna Quindlen’s fiction; I neither love it nor dislike it. Someone (who was it? was it you?) told me about this memoir, which is in the form of essays, something I genuinely enjoy. And there are many lovely, thoughtful essays in here about aging and mothering adult children, and life in general. Some of it was kind of dated (there is a whole section on politics that made me kind of sad and also like “just wait, Anna”) and she refers to “our generation” a lot, and “our generation” refers to baby boomers. I mean, she’s exactly my mom’s age, but I still think there was a lot that is resonant for women my age. It was interesting as her generation WAS the generation of women who were encouraged to Have It All, and it was fascinating to read about her experiences with Having It All. It’s really a memoir of life after fifty, and while some of it was truly wonderful to read – she has SUCH a talent with words – I’m still kind of neutral. I do love the title, though.
We are coming into the Holiday Home Stretch, friends! I hope things aren’t too stressful where you are. I have some work to finish this week and then I’m hoping to relax by the tree with some good books and yummy things. That sounds pretty good right about now. How about you? Tell me everything. xo
Well I am in the club of people who enjoy Last Christmas and its jaunty beat. We can all have opinions but it really gets my blood boiling when people have the opinion of: ‘I don’t like this and there is no way anyone else could like and if you do like it, there is something wrong with you.’ Sadly I do encounter a lot of these sort of strong opinions which is unfortunate. I am working hard to teach my boys to say ‘I don’t prefer that’ instead of a ruder alternative.
I am reading a book of essays now called ‘High Tide in Tucson’ by Barbara Kingsolver. I bought it for my sister this summer when she was moving from Tucson to the DC area and now that I am reading it, I’m having an ‘oh dear’ reaction because there are a lot of essays about working moms and my sister doesn’t work outside the home (and how could she as a military life?). But it is quite good. But now I need to text her and say – sorry, this was not meant to make you feel like you should work outside the home. Note to self: do not gift books you have not read. But a book I really enjoyed was ‘home stretch’ by Graham Norton. I would recommend it! It’s back list so easy to get ahold of and the author is Irish. Irish authors have really been working for me.
Hahaha whoops! But that sounds pretty good, I have liked some Barbara Kingsolver books. I feel like they’re always a bit long though?
I taught my kids to say “it’s not my favourite” because I HATED when kids would say “ewwww this is grosssss” about food. It’s one thing to THINK it, but another to speak it, right?
“Ah, ah-ah
Ooh-woah
Oh-oh”
The opening lyrics to “Last Christmas” sum up my feelings about people who are serious about Whamageddon, Nicole. In my opionion, George Michael is one of Greece’s great contributions to the world as well. I hope we can all be someone special this holiday season!
I love what you have to say about vegetarianism, not feeling too pious or supercilious about it, and the book rec(s)!
And your gingerbread people look scrumptious!
Someone spe-ech-shul!
I absolutely love George Michael and have been known to randomly belt out “sometimes the clothes do not make the man!” Oh, and Kissing a Fool. And Faith! And pretty much everything Wham! Wake me up! Before you go-go!
Nicole!! Have you heard this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vc766vr5eA
(in case the link doesn’t work Charlie Puth’s December 25th)
I hadn’t! Thank you!
It’s such an exercise in self control to not yuck someone’s yum. And boy, can music be polarizing! So many people told me they went to the Billy Joel/Rod Stewart concert in September and it was extremely difficult for me to think of something positive to say, as I can’t bear to hear the music of either! Last Christmas does not bother me at all! I’m one of those weirdos who cries whenever I hear Bandaid’s ‘Do They Know It’s Christmas.’ I just love that sad song.
I understand about the facebook saga. I had to stop looking at Reddit last year because of the hate. The last straw was when I suggested, in a state of Ohio thread (not a political thread) that I try to look at both Democrat and Republican viewpoints and why people decide to vote how they do. Well, you would think I had enlisted the help of Satan!!!! People tore me up like you wouldn’t believe. What a cesspool!
I’m picking up the Corona del Mar book from the library today and hoping that it’s not triggering for me. Trusting you on this one, Nicole! LOL! XO
Oh that’s so interesting, Bijoux, we are opposites there as I am a Huge Billy Joel Fan, and I think Rod Stewart is okay, I mean, I’m going to sing along like the dad in So I Married an Axe Murderer if I hear If You Want My Body (If ye want me body and ye think I’m seexy come on beebee let me kneewwww). Also I don’t care much for Do They Know It’s Christmas but if I need a good holiday cry I listen to White Wine in the Sun followed by River, and that will surely bring on a river of tears!
HOW DARE YOU LOOK AT BOTH SIDES OF THE STORY? How dare you try to see things from other people’s points of view??? MY GOODNESS YOU MONSTER.
Eeep, hope the book works for you. SO MANY CONTENT WARNINGS!
Well, Nicole. I thought about you yesterday! We were listening to a Christmas playlist on spotify yesterday, and “All I Want for Christmas is You” came on, which is another one of my lesser favorites. I know. What is wrong with me? Anyway, I said to my husband “Hey, I’ve BARELY HEARD “Last Christmas” this year!” and then it came on next, ha ha. Anyway- after all the controversy over that song, I actually don’t hate it anymore! I’m actually kind of amused when I hear it, thinking about all my blogger friends who love it. Sometimes I actually find myself- gasp- singing along! I guess my main complaint with that one and the Mariah Carey is, I just don’t get why they’re so beloved. But, i probably have weird tastes.
I have an odd relationship with Anna Quindlen, in that I absolutely LOVED her book Every Last One, and then found everything else of hers to be slightly boring. But, this book of essays sounds good- maybe I’ll check it out.
I do love that Mariah Carey song too, and I’m sure you’ll not be surprised! But I must know what your favourites are. I’m assuming the Charlie Brown Christmas soundtrack, but what else?
That Mariah Carey song is a BOP, Jenny. That’s why it’s so beloved! A BOP!
This isn’t the point, I know (the point is kindness and tolerance), but I’ve always wondered how Whamaggedon even works. What steps could you take to avoid hearing that or any specific song while out in public? Or is purely a game of luck?
This is why we are friends, Steph, because I have thought about that a lot over the years. I think it’s like a dice game, a game of chance. Because what, if the opening bars sound is a person supposed to drop to the ground covering their ears? It makes no sense! Is a person supposed to avoid all public spaces? I guess if true then maybe there were many winners during the pandemic.
How did you manage to find a book where someone was almost bludgeoned to death with a gnome?!
You know I don’t enjoy Last Christmas, but I love that you do! I think it’s wonderful that it brings you so much joy. The world would be a very boring place if we all only liked one kind of food, aesthetic, travel, job, book, fashion, home, form of exercise…or holiday song. And now if I DO hear Last Christmas, it brings me a sense of delight because I know how happy it would make you to hear it.
ELISABETH THE GNOMES! It was an experience reading that, let me tell you. The character collects gnomes, and her house is full of them, and then on a drug deal gone bad (she’s not the drug dealer but her son is, and she doesn’t know it) she gets beaten by a gnome until it breaks, and then the perpetrator uses another gnome to finish the job. GNOMES AS WEAPONS.
I love Last Christmas and it is hard to find a Christmas song I do not love! I chuckled at this post as my kids are both vegetarians (surprisingly my son decided on his own to be at age 4 and my daughter followed a couple years later). We eat 90% plant based at home but one lesson I have been working on with them is to be accepting of those who choose to eat meat, they are little strident vegetarians and shame me when I eat meat! Shaming of meat eaters is not a trait that will serve them well in life so we’re working on it!
Good for you for allowing them the gift of choice, Leneigh!
That reminds me of a Facebook I was a part of long long ago, it was “Calgary Vegans and Vegetarians” and it seemed to me to be the absolute worst group ever, because all that ever happened was that people were constantly being shamed for literally everything. And this was a group of supposedly like-minded people! Someone said something about local honey and was nearly bludgeoned to death by a gnome (not really) because bees are sentient beings, and yes they are, but maybe this isn’t the hill we all want to die on? DID NO ONE LEARN FROM THE BEE MOVIE?
Anyway, I am super impressed by you and your parenting!!
I learned about Whamaggedon just a few years ago and It certainly is a head scratcher. Why would you avoid such a delight? I absolutely love George Michael and wish he was still alive and living in my guest room. Which, I would demand he WAS alive and you know, otherwise that would be really weird.
Ok, I had to look up the Paul McCartney song cause it didn’t just come to me. I kind of enjoy that one, but I can see why it could grate on a person. I read some comments on YouTube and I think you might be in the minority, but that’s ok. Like you said, we all have feelings about things.
Um, I have no clue about the LED bulbs. Do I have them in my house? Most likely. Are they bad? I have zero clue.
I wanna read that first book, even with all the warnings. A murderous Gnome? Or the Gnome was a murder weapon, either way, you still sold me on it.
Imagine a Weekend at Bernie’s scenario, but with George Michael and your living room?
The gnome was a weapon, not of murder, but of extreme beating, so it was…well, eye opening?
The paragraph of empathy for the Last Christmas haters was PERFECTION.
Also yay! No yucking of yums! This is a good hill to die on, one I continually need to remind myself about.
The black-and-white thinking point is such a good one. I try very hard to be a “shades of grey” thinker, and I feel that I naturally tend in that direction anyway, but wow — sometimes I come up against something and realize that I have SUPER black and white thinking about it. One of my good friends is really good at kindly and gently opening my eyes to these moments, and I am always gobsmacked to find out that I am doing the thing that I find so frustrating when others do it!
I love Last Christmas.
Sometimes it’s hard though! There are so many situations that seem “obvious” but of course, the answers are so variable based on what other people’s lives and experiences are. Now that the pandemic is over, I can see so many shades of grey I didn’t see before, and going forward I hope I remember those lessons, you know?
I’m laughing at the thought of you getting mad at someone, because honestly, I can’t even imagine it.
Speaking of yucking someone’s yum, I don’t understand people who get upset—mad, even—at those who put up Christmas decorations early. They’re probably the same people who don’t like Last Christmas. 🤣
My dad loved Wonderful Christmastime. There’s a guy on TikTok who does a dance to it, and it always makes me smile.
OH KARI YES!!! How does putting up Christmas decorations early harm anyone? IT DOESN’T. Hell, someone could put up their tree in July and I would find it delightful.
Aww, well now when I hear that song I will smile because it makes you smile!
I LOVE THIS POST. I laughed out loud BY MYSELF at your last christmas empathy paragraph. HILARIOUS.
(I must say, though, as someone who studies argument, linking your plant-based diet to meat production ruining the planet does sound a bit morally superior– which, in those terms, IT IS).
Oh no, Sarah, no! I’m not about to argue with a professor of forensics (I’M NOT STUPID!) but that wasn’t what I meant to convey at all. What I meant to convey was that we all, no matter what we do, have a negative impact on the environment – meat production and consumption only being one part of that, there are so many things we do that damage the earth. The textile industry, for example, but you know, we need clothes. Transportation, because we all need to get places. Just heating and cooling our houses, but those are necessary too! That is why I chafe at the “moral superiority” thing, because everything we do, literally, is damaging to the environment. Any kind of crop destroys the environment. Hmm, maybe I need to audit one of your classes to clarify my arguments.
I also very recently (aka around Thanksgiving) read the Anna Quindlen. It’s not new at all- published in 2012- so it’s just kind of great that two of us read this 12 year old memoir. I had similar feelings about it. My Mom was also born in 1953.
As for Christmas lights? I’m neutral on LED. I do miss the huge bright bulbs that I remember from the 1980’s, but I also remember that they made my father incredibly cranky to deal with, so maybe it’s for the best that those lights have been retired.
Kara, was it you who recommended it? I thought a lot of the essays were great, but some maybe not relevant for women of our generation? But she is such a good writer.
I mostly remember the old lights as being super hot to the touch!
Yes to not yucking people’s yums!
And also yes to enjoying your yums unapologetically and enthusiastically!
I just went and watched the music video of Last Christmas because I really couldn’t remember the lyrics! The video was so 1980s and had a sweet story-line. I guess I don’t have strong feelings about the song. Ugh, Facebook can be such a nasty place! Why do people get so mean on there?
OMG about the plot of being beaten with a gnome!!! I guess we won’t be able to use that in our gnome book now. 🤣
Hahahah Michelle, I wish you were here with me when I read that scene, because I was just…what just happened? She’s in hospital from being beaten by a GNOME? WHAT???
The music video is absolutely wonderful and I love it!
The true affront here, to me, isn’t even the game (which I also find irritating), it’s the telling you to “Lighten up.” I’m not sure I have relationships that could easily recover from me saying “Hey, this is bugging me” and them responding “Lighten up.”
I have one strong association with Anna Quindlen, and I am pretty sure it was in that book. I do remember reading it, and I remember it being Boomerish, and I remember that she owns two houses but wrote something that annoyed me that seemed antithetical to owning two houses, and I don’t remember what that was. But what I DO remember is she said she stopped drinking entirely when she felt she was having trouble with it, and then she brought me up short by saying something like “There are no sadder words in the English language than ‘My mother was a drunk.'” And EVER SINCE THEN (and it has been YEARS, Nicole), I have been arguing with her in my head. Like, not to say those words aren’t sad, and also suuuuuper judgmental in tone and word-choice, but, not to say they couldn’t be considered sad! But can we honestly not think of sadder words? I feel like I can think of MUCH sadder words and situations. And that’s likely not even her precise quote!! But I have been irritated ever since by it.
Swistle, “lighten up” is right up there with “calm down.” There is no scenario in which those phrases will de-escalate a situation.
THAT QUOTE STRUCK ME TOO! It struck me too! And yes, yes, yes, that is a sad thing, alcoholism and any kind of addiction are very sad things, but IS THAT THE SADDEST THING???
I will die on the hill of my opinion that saying “calm down” has never once in the history of that phrase ever made anyone calm down. Not even once.
I have a theory that people who are particularly susceptible to earworms – cases where a song just… sits in your head, repeating itself, but only the parts you know, for sometimes *weeks* whenever there is not ambient music functionally drowning it out – are more “auuuugh!” about occasional exposure to extremely catchy songs with a few lyrics they are not a huge fan of, because odds are good that song will be haunting them at 3am. While it is sometimes annoying to not be able to make your brain stop repeating a song you sort of like – but, look, it’s literally hundreds of times that my brain has run the chorus to Purple Rain this hour, this is honestly a bit much – it’s *much more* annoying to be haunted by a song that kinda or really annoys you for whatever reason (lyrics, particular emotional cadence, the key, associated with someone who deliberately annoys you, working in retail the year the song came out and therefore hearing it every 15 minutes all shift long while coping with unpleasant customers and overdemanding management, there are lots of options), and sometimes that annoyance is heightened if you feel the song was perhaps bioengineered in order to be catchy [and therefore torment you more] and is inescapable and pursuing you everywhere, etc.
I am guessing that is part of what is going on with Last Christmas, with that additional ‘classic’ ultra-sophomoric “it’s super-cool to hate popular things because most people like them!!!” layer, and then with group culture Stuff created by and surrounding Whammageddon, introducing additional people, who otherwise would not have cared either way, to the idea of it being Kinda Neat (???) to communally hate this song.
Which… yeah. Sucks on a number of different levels. But also, as a Feliz Navidad avoider for earworm reasons [weeks of aggressively-cheerful mariachi with not many lyrics, repeating. AT 3AM. WEEKS], I can verify that there *is* a sense of victory when you hear the opening bars of something on the radio and successfully turn the thing off such that it will in fact not haunt you. I would expect that sense of victory to be heightened by the group experience and/or reporting on success/failure thereof. So, aside from the “fun to hate what normal people hate” facet when it exists, which is 1. bad and 2. *does* sometimes have a facet that is sort of about what ‘those other people’ like and therefore it does make sense for at least a smidge of it to feel personal, the rest of it sort of makes sense to me but it is Not COOL to make your coolness about someone else’s not-coolness and also yes, the yukking someone else’s yum thing is a problem [although I *am* good with yukking peoples’ yum when their yum is, for instance, racism, so there are maybe layers of priorities, but “your yum is ‘being an asshole’ so nope” does not come into play with Liking A Christmas Song Because You Like It]. I get some aspects of both sides of the anti-earworm and pro-Christmas-song-you-like-but-which-people-are-actively-making-it-uncool-to-like, is what I’m saying, and also think something is wrong with humans when they decide to wet-blanket for the ‘fun’ of wet-blanket-ing (which can be slightly different from making a game avoiding a song they do not want to earworm themselves with… but isn’t always, so, hmph).
But liking a catchy song: nothing wrong with that!
This comment is GOLD.
First of all, if someone’s yum is being racist, then yes, we should all be collectively yucking it!
I do get the earworm. I have a song playing in my head basically always, and as someone who once had a wake-up-in-the-middle-of-the-night earworm of that song that used to be on Sex and the City a lot, the lyrics of which I only know “more more more! How do you like it, how do you like it?” well, I get the irritation.
I am glad you expressed it as “it’s cool not to like the super-popular thing” because YES that is also how I feel! Sometimes things are just fun!
I’m going to have to come back and look at the comments on this when I have time, but wanted to tell you that it never even occurred to me that folks participating in Whammageddon might dislike the song…I love Wham!, I enjoy the song…and I play. I don’t actually do anything to avoid it, but if I hear the original song, I will post that I’m out. I remember reading about it, and when it started almost 20 years ago, the people who came up with it thought of it as a joke because the song was on ALL OF THE TIME, not because they hate it. However, perhaps some of the people in the FB group you unfollowed were slagging on the song? In that case, I think you did the right thing for sure.
PS – I’m still in thus far, though I heard a lovely cover at a holiday party recently.
So there’s been some discussion here about seeing other point of views, or at least acknowledging that they exist and the fact that someone has one doesn’t make them a terrible person. I read a book recently where the inhabitants of an island had to vote on whether they wanted to allow some tech billionaire change their island forever, from the tiny rural place with run down everything, to a busy place with lots of people, a decent school and medical facility, etc. I liked the way the author handled the people voting, which was something like this:
X voted to protect the reefs surrounding the island
Y voted to have the medical facility he wished had been there when his mother needed care.
Z voted for adventure and progress
W voted for quiet beaches
Like, not one of them voted for something horrible. But they were voting on opposite sides of the issue. I thought that was really well done.
That is fascinating! What an interesting way to look at things.
Wow, now that is a point of view I hadn’t even considered! I hadn’t even considered that someone would enjoy the song and play. Thanks J for telling me this (and yes, you are correct about the FB group, I like your view much better!)
Perhaps I came to it the way I did because the people who introduced me to the game are not assholes. That’s helpful. Also, Rule #4 mentions that you can “Enjoy the fuck out of covers”, and when I see people talk about losing, they say something like, “Now that I’m out, I’m going to listen to it and ENJOY!”
My policy is also to not comment iif I disagree…just keep on scrolling. I am sorry you got drawn into a negative situation. I am 100% don’t yuck other people’s yums. I like the wham song just fine. It’s catchy! (Did you see the documentary on Eham? It’s was surprisingly good). I personally don’t love listening to Christmas music from dec 1 so I used to just change radio stations. It never occurred to me to complain!
I haven’t seen that documentary but I have heard so many good things! And I am with you, I don’t comment negatively if I can help it (obviously this pushed me past my point of no return, I had CROSSED THE RUBICON so to speak). I mean, if I can’t give five stars to something, even if it’s a peloton ride, I don’t rate it. Which is probably not super helpful but hey, I am who I am.
I feel you. It used to be good enough to mute someone who was making FB unenjoyable, but starting in the pandemic there were some things that were solidly in the “I don’t need this in my life, even if it’s on mute”.
My preferred type of Christmas light is “all of them that I see on our nightly dog walks”.
I’m about halfway through Girls from Corona del Mar and liking the ride!
Birchy, yes. I did have that “wait, mute isn’t good enough” feeling.
I love your preferred type of lights and I am solidly in your camp!
LED lights are fine OUTSIDE, I think. But inside, they are SO HARSH. That is my beef with them. If you like your LED lights inside, good for you! It’s your home! But LED lights may be the bane of my existence. Hey, can you still buy incandescent lights in Canada? Because I might smuggle some lightbulbs into my suitcase the next time I go there.
Social media is so weird, isn’t it? I love Instagram, but I have carefully curated my feed to just get dogs and photos of Albania (I don’t know why, but I think I follow some Albania tourism feed). But Facebook is so so toxic and those people are my friends and acquaintances. So maybe I need a better group of friends and acquaintances. How do I get that?
I had no idea, so I asked an expert (my husband). He says no, you can’t buy incandescent bulbs in Canada unless, I guess, you buy them from eBay or something like that. Or FB marketplace? In an attempt to make your Facebook experience better with 100000x more Rex, I just sent you a friend request! Wait, you get all those photos on IG. Well, in any case, the request is there should you choose to accept it!
People seem to love comparing things or having strong opinions and then talking about people who don’t share them. What is it that they say? Comparison is the thief of joy? Nicole, I think that you do you! Haters are always going to hate.
Your love of Lady Christmas makes me think of the movie Love Actually where that guy has the pop song but he’s kind of skeezy and then in the end it turns out that he’s just a lonely human. PS I love that movie. I mean Colin Firth! Yes please. Anyway, if it brings you joy, I say do it and screw those who don’t agree!!
COLIN FIRTH!!! He’s so sexy. He is just so sexy. I lurrrrve him.
You know, I’ve only seen Love Actually once, so I feel like I should watch it again. I remember so little of it!
I agree about Christmas songs – just let people enjoy what they like except the Do They Know It’s Christmas Time song. To me, any song that includes the lyric “tonight thank god it’s them instead of you” really needs to reexamine itself. That said even my 15 YO loves Last Christmas so I won’t be participating in Whamageddon (sp?) this year or any other year.
Wait is that a lyric??? I didn’t know that! How did I miss that? JUST CALM DOWN NOW MAGGIE
I kid, I kid! My sons seem to also enjoy my eclectic Christmas playlists, either that or they have been so conditioned that they THINK they like it? I’m not asking questions.
TIL about Whamaggedon. I’ve never heard of that!
I’m not a fan of Last Christmas (and I do love Wonderful Christmastime) but I love that you love it so much! We all like different things and that keeps things interesting! I try very, very hard not to yuck someone’s yums because I know how terrible it feels when someone yucks my yums. It’s not always easy!
I think I may have to give the Corona Girls book a pass. Seems like the trigger warnings may be too much for me.
Stephany, we teach each other so much! I teach you about Whamaggedon, you teach me about the Girls Next Door!
Yeah, that book might not be for you. The subject matter is (obviously) pretty dark!
I was whammed this year on 30 November at a holiday market. Then I had it explained to me two days later that I wasn’t because those aren’t the rules by a person who wears a different Christmas jumper every day. And then I switched off. I haven’t even decorated my tree mainly because partner inexplicably bought one that is larger than the one across the street in front of the Croatian restaurant. It is immense. So! I’m just coasting now, trying to concentrate at work and looking forward to the coming year. I hope you are too, thanks for your wonderful writing. It has been a treat this year!
Tamara, the rules are that you listen to the rules from the woman who has 30 holiday jumpers! Imagine her closet. I am in holiday festivewear awe. Also in awe of your giant tree. Is it like in Christmas Vacation? Does it take up your whole living room?
Thanks so much for reading! xoxoxo
I was impressed by her wardrobe too, though I think in the UK it is easier to achieve than in other places. I haven’t seen Christmas Vacation, but I can tell you that I only have enough lights (LED, I caved last year when I could no longer find replacement bulbs) to cover the top third of the tree. I can also say that when I pass through the doorway between the kitchen and the lounge and squeeze past it, I’m almost certain I will bump into Mr. Tumnus. I don’t know what I am going to do with this thing. Tanti Auguri, Nicole!
Hahaha that is quite the visual I’m getting! Happy Holidays!
Thank you for the overarching message of Whamaggedon. Along the lines of the blogging community’s “you do you”. I’m trying to take that into 2025. What’s good for you may not (well, um, if I’m being honest, is likely not) good for me.
Absolutely! You do you is a good message!