One thing I didn’t realize would happen, with a retired husband and children no longer in the public school system, is that long weekends don’t really register for me anymore. Every weekend is a long weekend, therefore no weekend is a long weekend.
This is not to say that the Canada Day weekend was really affected by the school system, but since the school year finishes at the end of June, July 1 always felt like the big start to summer. We have a young houseguest – our dear friends’ son, who is himself a very good friend of my sons’, particularly my oldest, with whom he shares a birthday – and when my son mentioned he was coming, I thought oh yeah, I guess that IS a long weekend.
Personally, living in this beautiful climate, I feel like summer started weeks ago, so this holiday feels like a bit of a non-event. Interestingly, though, since Kelowna is very much a tourist town, I have noticed things like increased traffic and a lot more beach-themed items for sale in shops and stores. My new favourite bookshop was displaying all the beach reads, Ogopogo stuffies, and such items that are beloved by tourists, like a new cookbook written by my husband’s family friend, which pairs wines from the Burrowing Owl winery with menus using seasonal, local produce.
Speaking of which, I am still working my way through Julie’s cake cookbook, and this weekend, in honour of our guest I decided to make chocolate stout cake, with the single Guinness I had left in the fridge. I had more, but my son and our guest decided on Friday night to make stout floats using some of the homemade ice cream in the freezer. We didn’t have vanilla, so they improvised with mint and reported that it wasn’t very good. You don’t say? Mint and Guinness are NOT a winning combination? Colour me surprised. Well, the cake WAS very good, although it completely sunk in the middle. I did wonder why Julie had indicated that the batter was to be divided between two loaf pans; I thought that sounds silly, I’ll just pour it into an 8×8. Joke’s on me. Well, it tasted great, even if I flipped it over to hide the sunken middle.
As everyone who knows me even marginally knows, I love being outside. In good weather, particularly summer, I have low-level feelings of resentment for every moment I spend indoors. I think this is partly due to living almost my whole life in Calgary; if the weather is good, you had better enjoy it, because it could abruptly end at any moment. Any time the weather is nice, I just want to spend all my time outside.
At night, though, I like a bed, and walls, and the incredible modern inventions of running water and flush toilets, and so I am not a person who has incorporated camping into my life. Imagine telling our foremothers that, instead of hauling water from a well or creek and then heating it painstakingly on the stove, which has been fueled with wood chopped by hand, just so someone could take a stab at being some semblance of clean, that we have clean water at our fingertips, and not only that, we can choose the temperature? Imagine how exciting that would be for them, and then imagine telling them that we shall eschew this modern miracle to go hang out in the woods and be swarmed by mosquitoes at every turn?
So my stance on camping has historically been a negative one, but my husband found a loophole in my “bed, walls, toilet, and running water” argument by purchasing a camper. I am sure he’d love it if I said “our camper” but really, it’s HIS camper. I’ve been very pleased that he has used it with the boys, and was a bit startled to be asked to go with him and meet up with another couple this past Friday.
My first instinct was to Shut This Shit Down, but after a calming meditation, I realized that a) this was not in keeping with my current Live Your Life With Arms Wide Open mantra, b) the other couple was being really kind and welcoming, and were proposing so many accommodations and fun activities for me, c) sometimes marital harmony is preserved through compromise, and d) it was only for one night.
And you know what, friends, it was actually pretty fun! My friend brought an extra kayak and lifejacket for me, knowing that would be something I would love, my husband packed lots of wine and coolers, and my friend’s husband brought an entire cake and encouraged me to eat two pieces. I felt like the subject of Tonight’s The Night, but in a non-sexual way; like I was a terrified virgin who needed smooth jazz, soft words, and some wine to get things going.
Several of my camping friends, on hearing the news, congratulated me enthusiastically, saying that I would love my new life as a Happy Camper. I would not go so far as that; I cannot with any honesty use the word “love” and “camping” in the same sentence, but it was pretty fun. I did love the kayaking and the walks the girls did with the dogs while the guys went fishing, I did love the cake and the wine and sitting by the fire until I was overcome with mosquito bites.
The happy result as far as my husband is concerned is that I have agreed to go annually, on my one night only condition. I know! What have I become? Someone who is dousing themselves in witch hazel, that’s what.
Weekly Reading
One Star Romance. I expected this enemies-to-lovers book about a man who rates a woman’s debut novel one star, and then the two of them find themselves as best man and maid of honour at their friends’ wedding, to be a light and fluffy read. It was not! It was so much more involved: it is a romance, for sure, but it’s also a book about friendship and family and growing up. I really liked it! It definitely took me by surprise, it’s a very clever and thoughtful book with some great character arcs.
1000 Words: A Writer’s Guide To Staying Creative, Focused, and Productive Year Round. I heard this woman being interviewed on a podcast; she created the 1000 Words of Summer, which is a motivational group for writers. The key is to write 1000 words a day for two weeks in the summer. This was intriguing to me because 1000 words a day, four to five days a week was exactly how I wrote my first draft. This book is about the craft of writing, but is mostly meant to be motivational and inspirational, including short essays from a number of very accomplished authors.
What did I just say? First draft? I had a goal, very quietly kept close to my chest, of writing a first draft of a novel in 2024, and on June 5, I completed that goal! I finished the reread last week and am preparing for the second draft now. I will have much more to say about it, I’m sure, in the coming weeks.
Happy Canada Day, friends! Here’s to July! I hope you all have a beautiful week. xo
Oh wow!!! So exciting about the novel!! Cannot wait to hear more.
I’m glad you enjoyed the camping night. 🙂 I grew up doing a lot of camping in a camper and I have wonderful memories of those times! As an adult I have not camped at all, unless you count when Ethan and I rented a cabin for a fee nights (but it had WiFi and a sauna inside so I don’t think it counts as camping. Haha! Actually it was perfect because we still got the bonfire and the beautiful scenery but none of the rest.) My husband has no interest in camping at all (grew up in Mexico City and is about the most “city” person you can be, lol). And although I enjoyed it as a child, I am fairly indifferent to it now. If my husband were really into camping I could see myself getting on board, but since he’s not, it’s also not something I care to push him to do OR do on my own, either.
Thanks Kae!
Wifi and a sauna sounds like my kind of camping! I am with your husband, I could probably go forever without doing it, but my husband really loves it, so I guess I’ll compromise one night a year.
AHA! I KNEW you were writing a book! Well… I didn’t know it, but I guessed. You had mentioned a “big project” and it just seemed like this had to be it. Very exciting! Congrats on completing that first draft.
Nicole, I am with you 100%. I love the outdoors, but I don’t want to sleep in it. I would go on a one night trip, once a year, if I had a camper and everything else you mentioned, including Rex to keep me company. And also lots of Witch Hazel- I too am a mosquito magnet.
Thanks so much Jenny!!! More details to come, I’m sure.
Rex turned out to be a pretty good camper! Really dirty, of course, but that’s just part of the experience.
North was home this past weekend (they’ve actually come home the past three weekends) and I asked if it was for the chance to sleep in their own room, use flush toilets, and see the kittens and they said that was about it. “And eat ice cream,” added, because we’ve been going out for ice cream a lot.
Over the years, Beth took the kids on a lot of camping trips for one-on-one time, and I’d stay home for one-on-one time with whatever kid wasn’t camping. Pre-kids, we camped a lot while traveling, to save money, but I haven’t in quite a while.
I’m glad you enjoyed your experimental camping trip. And congrats on the book draft! That’s a big deal.
Steph, this was me and R too – well, except for the one-on-one thing. He’d take the guys camping and I’d stay home with the dog. Win win! I didn’t realize that North’s camp was so…camp! No flush toilets! Aieeee!
I am so excited to read your novel!!!!!!! You are a superstar!!!!!
Congrats on getting through your first camping experience! Like you, I am firmly in the No Camping Camp. Which is a confusing sentence to type. I think a nice camper might help, and kayaking, wine, cake, and walks with friends all sound excellent. But I think the mosquitos thing would be a deal breaker. One night a year seems like a Very Generous Compromise on your part.
I have been listening to 1,000 words of summer this summer and I really enjoy it! It is so full of good advice and commiseration, isn’t it?
Oh Suzanne, you will be one of the first, if not the first to read it (beta?).
I also feel like it was a Very Generous Compromise, particularly since my legs are literally covered in bites, despite thick pants and bug spray.
GAH! YOU WROTE A FIRST DRAFT! ALL THE JAZZ HANDS FOR YOU, MY FRIEND! Ok, I’ll stop yelling now and say that the first draft of anything is the hardest in my opinion so this is an accomplishment to be celebrated! I write as part of my job and it is so hard and I know exactly what I need to write about, for the most part. But it’s a lot of ‘typetypetypetypetypetypetypetypetypee’ followed by deleeeeeeeeeeeeeeete. And a lot of hand wringing on my part as well.
I am glad you had a great experience with your one night of camping in a camper. I grew up camping in a camper and have great childhood memories. I would like to start to camp with our boys but they need to be a bit older for us to consider trying it out. I know people with kids our boys’ age or younger camp but we are a hard pass for another 1-2 years, I think. There are so many beautiful campgrounds in Minnesota so it would be fun family activity. But I’m just not quite there yet.
In reading news, I am almost done w/ Sandwich which I am loving although I think I am not quite her target audience because I do not have sepia-toned memories of raising small children… But it is interesting to think about what I might miss from this stage? Yesterday I took the boys to a park for 2 hours while Phil did swim club and then after lunch I took the boys to a local pool for over 3 hours where I was basically velcroed to Taco since we were at a pool (it was very shallow – but still). As an aside, I saw so many moms reading actual books in pool chairs. I stared longingly at them while Taco insisted I sit in the water right next to him so he could sit in my lap. Anyways, we got home, I showered, and then sat down on the couch while the boys watched The Floor is Lava. And Taco would not stop touching me, especially with his feet. I told him I really needed some space and eventually had to go up to my room and lay in bed for awhile because that was the only way I was going to not have someone touching me. I am kind of shocked he didn’t follow me upstairs. All this is to say – will I someday miss being smothered?? Hmmm… time will tell.
Thanks Lisa!
With regards to Sandwich, your comment reminded me of something I came across when the boys were like 2 and 3. This is from Alice Munro’s The Spanish Lady and the quote is with regards to a train ride: “I had to sleep close beside them at night and sit with them climbing around me in the daytime; my body felt bruised by their knees and elbows and feet. I did think then that it would be lovely to be a woman traveling alone, able to sit after a meal drinking coffee and looking out the window, able to go to the club car and have a drink. Now…all that time of care and confusion that seemed as if it would never end seems as if it never were.”
I remember reading that when the boys were young and being kind of blown away. And you know what, it’s true, I feel exactly this same way. I don’t think you are yet her target audience but come back to it in say 15 years – I AM her target audience and wow, it was really resonant for me. I also remember the first time I went to a playground and took a magazine and READ THE MAGAZINE. It was pretty amazing.
Nicole!!!!!!!!!!! Congratulations on the novel!!!!! Aaaaaah!! SO happy and proud and can’t wait to hear (and read!!) more!
Happy to hear the marital-compromise camping trip was fine… but you kinda saved the best for last :)!
Thanks Maya! I’m pretty excited about it!
Once again we agree. No camping for me either. I got 1000 Words from the library but am having difficulty getting into it. I’ll try again on your recommendation.
I don’t think there is anything NEW in there, Laura, but I did like the author essays that are sprinkled in.
First and foremost, congratulations on finishing your first draft!!!!!! That’s wonderful and amazing, and you can count me in as one of the first in line to buy your novel when it’s released! To have finished the first draft is a very important step in the process and should be celebrated to the fullest! I hope you are celebrating! I’m doing a happy dance on your behalf!
I’m with you on the camping. But one night in a camper doesn’t sound too bad. I’m glad you had fun and got to eat cake.
Speaking of cake – your Stout Cake looks delicious! What a smart idea to flip it over to the sunken spot doesn’t show!
Thank you so much Michelle! I am definitely doing the Snoopy happy dance!
Congrats on your first draft! That is exciting business! Starting is always the hardest part of anything. I cannot believe you are saying that camping was fun. The combination of camping, kayaking, and a campfire is like a Trifecta of Hell to me. I need real toilets, activities that don’t involve manual labor, and not smelling like smoke when I’m done.
That cake looks soooo good. I would have thought loaf pans was dumb, too. Live and learn.
Hahahaha Bijoux, and another reason that you and I are friends! This comment cracked me right up (a friend on FB simply commented “the fuck?” and I felt very seen). The Trifecta of Hell!!!
Starting is always the hardest part, so I’m pretty excited I accomplished it!
Woohoo first draft! That is SO EXCITING, Nicole, congrats! I am a “my idea of camping is sketchy wifi in a clean hotel with air conditioning” person, so I am super impressed at your camping experience! Happy Canada Day!
Thank you Lindsay! And ME TOO. Sketchy wifi does sound a lot like camping! Or maybe kind of rough sheets with low thread count?
Nicole, CONGRATS on your first draft being done! So excited for you!!
I am firmly in the no camping group. I *might* be persuaded it there was a camper or a cabin; but I seriously doubt it. So good for you for compromising on one night a year; I don’t think I have it in me.
THAT’S MY GIRL!!!! I feel so seen, Gigi! I will say that if it was a tent, it would be a hard no.
Thanks so much, I will be talking about the draft soon!
Happy Canada Day!!!
I’ve never been camping, but I’d love to try it just once. I’ve joked that once the boys are done with Boy Scouts that they owe me a family camping trip. I’d love to take Doggo on a trip like that.
I’m so excited for your book! Congrats!!! Yes I know it’s the first draft but the point is YOU GOT TO FIRST DRAFT STATUS!!! I can’t wait to come along on the journey as the book “levels up”. I’ve said this to Suzanne and I’ll say it to you – now we’re just talking about it but sooner or later my finger will be clicking the “pre order” button on Amazon.
Note to self: read 1,000 Words.
Thank you so much Birchy, what a sweet comment! The first draft really does feel like a huge step!
I am actually surprised you haven’t camped, what with your Boy Scout troop that lives under your roof!
I think sometimes about what Ma Ingalls types would think of my life. My hot showers. My dishwasher. My washing machine. My…indoors, with floors.
I can imagine going camping for One Night with my husband (I too would be wooed by the cake and wine and welcoming friends and so forth), but I would want the Marital Compromise to include not just my participation in his camping but an EXCHANGE. He would need to come with me on one night of something he did not want to do—and I would similarly woo him with various accommodations to make it less burdensome. But oh: he would indeed be doing a matching number of nights of something he did not want to do.
Swistle, I too think about that all the time. Just think what a miracle it is to have running water and sewage. Flick a switch, lights turn on. Press a button, oven heats up. Laundry does not take an entire day of physical labour! And yes, I just remembered her sweeping out the actual hole in the ground that they lived in. Dirt floors!
Oooh a marital exchange. I wonder what I could do! Food for thought.
I just did a double take. Draft, what now? How exciting. I can’t wait to hear more. If you draft has more lines similar to: ‘like I was a terrified virgin who needed smooth jazz, soft words, and some wine to get things going.’ Then I cannot wait to hear more about it.
We camped at national parks every other year for years when the kids were young. Like young enough that one of them would inevitably drop a toothbrush under the urinal in the men’s shared bathroom. Why every other year, you ask? Because I needed that much time to be able to embrace the experience again. We did it because it was such a cheap way to travel. I’m glad you enjoyed the one night deal and that you’ve agreed to make a repeat appearance. Go you. I think I’m the opposite. Been there, done that. Although, if there was a camper involved, maybe I could be convinced.
Ernie, this campground didn’t have bathrooms! It had one outhouse. But we had the camper and everyone else at the site had an RV of some sort, so it felt okay. Definitely a cheap way to travel! I mean, other than the cost of the camper.
I will share more about my draft very soon! Thank you!
Congratualtions on your first draft. How fabulous! Can’t wait to hear all the details.
Yay you, for taking the plunge and agreeing to the night in a camper and for friends and Hubby making sure it was a great experience for you. The setting looks beautiful though. We used to rough camp (no toilets or power) next to the river in summer and waterski, but I was young then and prefer not having to wonder off into the bush and dig a hole to go to the bathroom. Now I prefer a toilet, preferably one that I dont have to walk through the campsite for. I love glamping though – the perfect mix of outdoors with all the amenities, although most of the options like that are not cheap.
Melissa, this campground had zero amenities other than an outhouse, so it would be pretty rough camping if we didn’t have the camper. It was a small site but everyone had an RV of some kind. Glamping is definitely the way to go IMO!
You are writing a novel??? wooo! that’s amazing! please share more details about it. have you mentioned it before? I must have missed that! I’ve always wonder how one non-writer become a writer of fiction? what was the process like? I’m very intrigued.
on camping… I’m glad you tried and did not dislike. I’m the same that I like the idea of it but prefer the comfort of a hotel, but i’m not ruling it out as it could also be fun to be outdoor with a group of friends/family doing something new.
Hi Coco, I haven’t mentioned it at all on the blog and really only a very few people knew about it! I will definitely write more about the process!
Exactly that – I don’t want to rule out things that could be fun! And it was pretty fun.
Congrats, my friend. I knew you had some great writing project in the works BUT I DID NOT GUESS A NOVEL and I already know it will be amazing. (No bear erotica, I’m presuming?)
I’m a hard pass on camping, but looooovvveeedd it as a kid. I feel a twinge of regret that I haven’t taken my kids, but then I tell that twinge to go use a flush toilet and it goes away. My dad loved camping and would take me, but my mother didn’t go a single time. She is not a camper. My compromise is we go visit my parents who live on a lake. Hot showers, indoor plumbing, electricity…and a stone’s throw from water, and a fire pit. The best of both worlds in my opinion.
It just feels like so much work to me? I am also a delicate pansy when it comes to bug bites and getting cold.
All that to say, I am proud of you (and Rex) and it looks like a fabulous time.
LOLOLOL BEAR EROTICA. Elisabeth! Don’t spoil the main plot point!!!
Visiting my parents in their lake home is also my idea of camping! But the boys and husband all love it, so they will definitely enjoy the camper even more. They go camping together every year. I currently look like I have leprosy, I have that many bug bites! Yikes.
A first draft!!!!! Go you! How exciting! Can’t wait to hear more!
I love camping, am always excited to hear when other people have camping adventures. My Husband is also more likely to go camping when friends and alcohol are involved.
I read a book by Laura Hankin (Happy and You Know It) that I thought was quite good- it’s about a mom’s group going off the rails. I wonder if One Star Romance is a genre turn for her or a marketing turn because Happy and You Know It definitely is not a romance.
I wouldn’t say One Star Romance is entirely a romance either – it IS, but it’s a lot of friendship, family, and what it’s like to grow up. I just put Happy And You Know It on hold at the library, will report back!
My husband also loves camping! You two would get along!
Camping, huh? You know I consider a motel with no room service to be camping, so from my perspective you are… crazy! 😜 That being said, I’m glad you had fun. Out there. In nature. All night.
Ally, you and I are on the same page! But all in all it was a good time!
Your family and friends are so loving. What a great way to support you while also making camping comfortable for you. I love this.
I cannot wait to read your book. I am rooting for you all of the way! 💕
Thank you so much, Kari!
Yes, everyone was so kind and loving!
By the way, my zinnias are in bloom and I think of you every time I look at them (which is several times a day). xo
I love that they are blooming! Ours are getting ready to! ❤️
My husband bought us (himself) a camper for his 40th birthday. Since then (six years ago), we’ve logged 10K miles and countless nights. I actually like it a lot more than I expected. It’s basically an extension of my house, complete with a bed that’s sometimes more comfortable than my normal bed.
Hi Kara! I have to say I was pleasantly surprised at how comfy the bed was! I really didn’t expect that. I’m so glad you’re enjoying the camper life!
Cannot wait to read it!! Also, this is my favorite thing you have written on this blog: “I felt like the subject of Tonight’s The Night, but in a non-sexual way; like I was a terrified virgin who needed smooth jazz, soft words, and some wine to get things going.”
Thanks so much Sarah!
How exciting for your finished first draft! That’s a huge accomplishment, congrats.
I like to say that my idea of roughing it is a claw-foot tub, and when I said that to someone recently, they countered with “Or a hotel with no room service!” I’m glad that your cautious foray into camping went so well; it’s nice that the others were supportive.
Hahaha no room service, or maybe a low thread count for the sheets? It’s all the same!!
And thank you so much!
My husband wants us to get into camping and we have all the gear. But, sadly, I am a girl who sleeps with a special pillow on a regular bed, so I think we can all agree that I’m not a great candidate for this blow-up mattress nonsense. I’ll hike, I’ll kayak, I’ll do whatever you want me to, but I want a room at the end of it all. And a hot shower.
YOU WROTE A WHOLE BOOK!! That’s so exciting. Do we get any clues? Fiction or non? Is it a romance novel or a book about how to raise the cutest dogs ever?
Oh good lord, a blow up mattress???? Noooooo! I will say that the bed in the camper was pretty comfy, which surprised me.
Thank you! It’s a novel, fiction, and there’s a bit of romance in there but sadly no dogs – the next one, maybe!
Is there at least a mention of a hat?
I will DEFINITELY work in a mention of a hat!
I loved this and your honesty re: camping! I was really into backpacking as a teen/young 20s pre-kids person. I’ve been car camping (like sleeping in a tent at a set campground) many times as well, a few times with my kids and feel very “meh” about it. I guess I’m a “go hardcore backpacking or just rent a nice house and enjoy the flush toilet and wifi” kind of girl after all. I’ve never slept in a camper and have no desire too–isn’t it just super cramped? If I’m going to be cramped and not have accesss to all of life’s luxuries I’d choose a boat over a camper I think? This quote cracked me up so hard especially since “Tonight is the Night” is one of my ALL TIME favorite songs and not very well known “like I was a terrified virgin who needed smooth jazz, soft words, and some wine to get things going.”
Kat, I like your all or nothing style! The camper is definitely a bit cramped, especially with the 100 pound dog, but mostly we were outside so it wasn’t really a big deal.
Ha! I am apparently not your target audience 🙂 as I love car camping with my kids and spouse. I backpacked a bit in my 20s, and loved it, but I can’t imagine carrying all my stuff PLUS my kids stuff (they’re still in elementary school). I find car camping to be great fun in this stage–we have a cooler with ice, all the snacks we can cram in the car, and we get to wake up in a tent with fresh air on our faces. The kids run around and get dirty, while the adults sit around and chat or read or play cards. I’ll be curious to see if we age out of camping, and whether that means we shift back to backpacking or get a camper. Time will tell!
Hi KV! That’s awesome that you love camping so much. I have a few friends who would do exactly that – car camping – with their kids for weeks every summer. It wasn’t something for me, but they sure loved it! I wonder if you’ll end up backpacking with your kids – it sounds like they love camping too, so maybe when they are old enough to carry their own stuff? My sons went on backpacking trips when they were in high school and junior high, and they did love it.
The thing about camping is all the work. The packing and food prep and then the unpacking is all too much for me, even though travel with your own bed is so appealing. Good for you trying something new!! And also what an amazing goal to achieve – your first draft! I would be happy to be an early reader, I know I would love it – book twins! I’ve actually stopped and started a couple of different books and one day maybe I will finish one of them. I don’t think it’s the ‘right chapter’ for me yet. I can’t wait to read yours!!
It is a lot of work but my husband did most of it!
Thanks so much Anna – I will probably look for early readers after the second draft, I think I will be ready by then! I would be happy to have you!
It was the right time for me – empty nest and all – and one day it will be the right time for you!
YOU WROTE A WHOLE BOOK! That’s such an amazing accomplishment. I’m so proud of you, friend. And excited to put a Nicole Boyhouse book on my shelf when it’s ready. 🙂
I think I could handle camping if a) there was a camper involved and b) someone else was there to do all the hard work involved. Ha! It does feel like a lot of effort for such a short amount of time. This is also how I feel about going to the beach.
As I told you on Instagram already, you’re a freakin’ rockstar: A NOVEL. I am so thrilled and super-intrigued to read it! Yay!
I am very much like you. I LOVE spending time outdoors (and I have done camping in my younger years) but I prefer a bed and running water. I mean, a camper is a sweet gig, but since I don’t see us get a camper anytime soon (my husband would not be the handyman that I think you need to be when you have a whole camper), I stick to day trips but I love that you gave this adventure ago and liked it 🙂