I am constantly striving to be really mindful in terms of consumption and shopping, to be thoughtful in my purchases and to buy only what I actually need. Lately, though, I have been sliding into Mindless Clothes Shopping Territory, and I feel that it should be curbed.
It started innocently enough. Out of necessity, I have bought a lot of clothes over the past nine months, post-giant-closet-purge. Since my body changed shape, and so much of my wardrobe no longer fit in the way I wanted it to, I replaced many items with more suitable ones. I don’t regret that or feel bad about it, but I do think that “needing new jeans” didn’t really need to translate to “I just bought six pair,” and yet here we are. Wanting a new little black dress didn’t really mean that I should buy three, and I probably didn’t need five pair of capri pants and several tees and workout pieces. But again, here we are.
My bid to love my clothes again has led to me buying a lot of clothes.
The thing is, though, I do love my clothes, especially my new ones, and the truth is that I didn’t really need to hang onto things that were almost twenty years old and were ill-fitting into the bargain. I can now say with confidence that I love everything in my closet, I would happily don anything in there and feel good about it. I’m pleased with the state of my wardrobe but the nine-month shopping spree needs to end.
It’s gotten to the point where I’m just mindlessly popping onto my favourite shops’ websites, Just To Look, which of course leads to Oh That’s Cute, which then leads to Add To Cart and Checkout, which is becoming a problem. How many tees does one woman need? I don’t know but probably not seventy-six. And that doesn’t even include tanks or yoga tops.
Clearly, my tops were not part of the Great Closet Purge, and also, it’s time to reign it in. I need a reset, but I’m not sure what form that will take, exactly. I do not want to do another no-shopping challenge, if only because my husband might leave me and my mother will disown me if I attempt that again. I don’t want to say I’m not going to buy anything for x amount of time because what if my body changes again? I mean, I hope not, because this could become a very expensive endeavour, replacing clothes constantly. But I didn’t see the changes coming the first time, so it’s possible it could happen again. Also, I want to feel free to buy a new parka, if needed, or winter boots, and not feel shame about it, the way I still feel about the 100-Day Challenge, even though I’ve played piano for more than 100 days this year, just not consecutively.
So it’s time to incorporate more mindfulness into my shopping habits. I am going to make a real effort, going forward, of shopping my closet before doing anything else. I have so many beautiful things, I really do not need more. Everything fits now, nothing needs replacing, I do not need one more thing no matter how cute it is.
A few months ago, Sarah (HI SARAH) casually mentioned that she was going to enjoy what she has and those words echoed in my mind; I have been thinking about it a lot since then. We all know how exciting it is to get a new little something, whether it be a lipstick or panties or even some kind of home good, but where does it end? I DON’T NEED SEVENTY-SEVEN TEES.
I was talking with someone about Swedish Death Cleaning, and while I don’t expect to die anytime soon – or, at least, I hope not – the last thing I want when I shuffle off this mortal coil is to leave behind a landfill’s worth of clothing items. Also, I just realized that I read that book in 2018, which is startling. I thought it was during the pandemic! What is time.
Anyway. I am going to try to retrain my brain, which has unravelled in the past nine months, and which USED TO BE good at mindful shopping, to just Enjoy What I Have. I have so much! I’m going to enjoy it.
Weekly Reading
Ruby-Fruit Jungle. I picked this up on a whim at the library, and I did not enjoy it at all. It’s a landmark lesbian coming of age book, but I found it to be a tedious and dull read.
Dream Count. Wow. Wow. This novel was so beautiful, so heartbreaking, so moving. I thought about it constantly, even when I wasn’t reading it. At one point I was gasping for breath, it was such an incredible story with the most complex fleshed-out characters. It begins in the pandemic and ends in the pandemic, and in between are the stories of four African women whose lives are intertwined in different ways. When something terrible happens to one of them, we see how unfair the world is not only to the less-privileged, but also to those we “other.” I found the storytelling from four points of view to be absolutely engrossing and the character I liked the least in the beginning became the most interesting and sympathetic one to me. Many lines of note stood out to me, such as “I look at her and think that it isn’t about this particular rape. It is about any rape at all. Ahemen prefers men. In the face of any rape story, she will craft for men the most gorgeous of excuses, and for women her instinct will be distrust.” I absolutely have known women like this in my life. The description of early pandemic days, when we were all conjecturing as to what to do, how to avoid being ill, what news we all had, is so very real. If you, like me, enjoy character-driven books about complicated women, multiple points of view, and absolutely stunning writing, you will love this book.
This Is A Love Story. As a woman dies of cancer, she and her husband recall their life together. This book is very moving not because they lived an idyllic, romantic, perfect life, but because they didn’t. It is a very real story about a very real marriage with ups and downs: work stress, living a creative life, paying the bills, postpartum depression, an affair, and, above all, a very strained and distant lifelong relationship between the woman and her only son. The writing style is very unique and interesting; much of it is written in the second person, which is a rare choice, and the rest of it is told from a few different points of view. My favourite part about this was not the story about the couple, but the little snippets about all the people moving through the physical centre of this story, which is Central Park. I often look at the people moving around me and think about what their stories could be. We all have a story housed within us.
*******
Upon discovering my Great Tee Collection, I fielded a couple of questions from my family. From my younger son: do you WEAR all of them? The answer to that is yes, although some get worn more than others. From my husband: how long did it take you to amass that many? I would say about fifteen years; I hang all my shirts to dry and I try to buy nice quality items, so they last a long time. But the long and the short of it is that I am now on a self-imposed shopping hiatus! I hope I can keep to it, and that my bad habits haven’t stuck. I hope you all have a beautiful week. xo
I have the opposite problem in that I need more clothes but haven’t really enjoyed dressing my body so I am getting by with the barest of essentials. I probably have 7 shirts right now, and that might be a generous estimate! I have a good amount of work dresses but am lacking in casual clothes. I am working on filling this gap but I do not enjoy shopping and find online shopping so frustrating… eeks.
I love that we reading This is a Love Story so closely together so we could text about it. It ads such a great book but not for everyone given how character driven (which is our jam but not everyone’s jam).
Yes Lisa, exactly! I did like it a lot but I feel like if I read it at the wrong time, well, that wouldn’t be great.
Good luck with your clothing search! I will say it took some time, with a new body and all, to figure out how to dress it.
Hmmm…do I want to read This is A Love Story? After several weeks of having multiple books checked out at once I’m down to just one, and I’m almost finished with it.
I’ve bought a lot of clothes in the past year, and the issue is that some areas are successful and some are not. I finally have a decent set of shorts and jeans, so my bottom half is set. I’m less successful with tops, and I find that I’ve gotten sloppy with ruthlessly returning anything that’s not a wow.
Hmmm. Do you want to read it? Nance below said it would be good only at a certain time, and I think that’s right. So there’s death, there’s a really really really rough mother-son relationship, there’s postpartum depression, there’s an affair…it’s good, I enjoyed it, but I’m going to put the caution tape around it.
I can see something that started innocently, buying new clothes because you needed them, could spiral out of control. And it’s hard, because one t shirt is not exactly like another. You might have 77 t shirts (wait- is that the real number???) but you don’t have one exactly like the one you’re adding to your cart. Well- good luck with your shopping hiatus! At least you can honestly say you love everything in your closet- that’s a wonderful feeling (I mean- I wouldn’t know, but I’m imagining it would be).
Dream Count sounds good! But just like your self-imposed shopping hiatus, I’m on a hiatus from books that take place during the pandemic.
Jenny, I don’t think you would like Dream Count and not just because of the pandemic – I just don’t think it’s a book you would enjoy.
IT DID SPIRAL OUT OF CONTROL. I mean, things begin out of necessity but now things have gotten insane.
The real number is 76! And that does not include tanks, yoga tops, sweaters, or sweatshirts. Yikes!
I have more t-shirts than any other kind of garment, too. I haven’t counted them, but my guess is 40+. At least one is from college (40ish years ago). Maybe I should count and cull them.
So I told J that I had “a ton” of tees and asked him to guess how many. He was like “20?” Hahaha NOT EVEN CLOSE. I’d be curious to know how many you have! I have so many different kinds, for layering and exercise and garden, etc.
Well, I did it. There were 46 and I discarded two. I also organized them by color so I could better find the ones I want. Turns out my favorite t-shirt color is blue (10 shirts), followed by white (9), black (7), red (6), gray (5), green (4), purple and orange (2 each), and brown (1).
Steph! I feel a kinship between us and our tees. You won’t be surprised that most of mine are black, but I do have a couple of greys and blues in there too.
I just remembered I forgot to count the one I was wearing and one in the wash (both white), but the two I got rid of were also white, so the count remains the same.
I’d love to say I love everything in my closet, but I don’t. I do very little clothes shopping, and a lot of my clothes are old. I detest shopping in person and trying on clothes, which is likely the reason, and I don’t much like online shopping either so there’s that. Having said that though, I can understand that wanting feel-good-in-something-new. I try to cull my closet every now and then (more then than now) but some things are hard to get rid of. As for T-shirts – I think finding the perfect one is rare (for me anyway), they’re always too long.
Trying on clothes is the worst. Those little tiny dressing rooms, the bad lighting, the giant mirrors…ugh. I hate it too!
I love to go to TJMaxx and Marshall’s, but I have the opposite problem. I rarely find anything that I like or that fits me right. I could only dream of finding three black dresses! I do hang onto stuff forever (like you, I hang and iron most shirts because I’m THAT picky!) because otherwise, my closet would be empty!
I don’t iron anything but I do hang all my tops to dry – and pants too – and I think it really makes a difference about how long they last! I have never once been in a TJ Maxx or a Marshalls (the former we don’t have here, the latter we do but I’ve never gone in!)
Tshirts are a problem for me, too. And socks. Generally speaking it’s because people have given me these items and there’s a lot of emotion locked into it. But I really only wear seven or eight tshirts, so I should probably get rid of some of them. *sigh* Also, I have A LOT of pants hanging in my closet and I rarely wear pants, so what are they doing there? I should do a purge.
Maybe later.
Engie, for all my excess shopping, I am so bad about not buying socks when I should. I occasionally just stock up and buy a whole bunch of the same socks all at one time. I seem to be hard on socks? Idk why.
I love that you’re being mindful about clothes shopping! I completely agree – loving what you already have feels so much better than constantly chasing the next cute thing.
I’m very frugal and rarely buy clothes unless I absolutely need them, usually wearing things until they fall apart.
Since we’ve been in Cape Town, though, I’ve been giving a lot away to student girls, who are so grateful for it. As a result, my closet choices are dwindling fast, and I’ve found myself shopping a bit more than usual, so far I’m at CAD 340 this year. I have to admit, it feels good to have an clothes upgrade.
$340 is a really reasonable amount for the year! Good for you! It does feel good to give clothes to a good cause. When I cleaned out my wardrobe I felt a bit sad since so many pieces were in such great shape, but I remembered the Marie Kondo thing about allowing clothes to have a second life with someone else. I mean, they don’t do anyone good being stuck in my closet, unworn!
I don’t enjoy clothes shopping so I go out in spurts and buy to replace what I need. I often find a top or pair of pants I like and then buy them in 2 or 3 different colours. I rarely shop online as I’m never sure the item will fit properly and I don’t want the hassle of returning it. Part of it is I get grumpy wandering stores, trying things on that don’t fit or feel right and then after spending a couple of hours at it come home with nothing! That’s why when I do find something that fits I’ll by more than one of it.
I have had Dream Count on hold for months and can’t wait to read it. I’ve read and loved her other books and listened to her TED Talks. She is amazing!
Jacquie, a few years ago I was visiting with my husband’s cousin, and I complimented her top. She said “I’ve reached the age where if I find something I like and that suits me, I buy it in several colours.” It is SUCH a smart idea! This is why I have six pair of jeans, because once I found a couple of styles that worked, I just bought them in different washes. I am 100% with you on this. When it comes to online shopping, I only do that for stores that I already know how their clothes fit and even then I find myself grumpily returning things. I also hate going to the mall and trying on tons of things in those terrible change rooms with fluorescent lights! I feel like we are now Shopping Soul Sisters.
I can’t wait for you to read Dream Count! I have only read Purple Hibiscus – and loved it – and so I’m going to read everything she’s written now.
I don’t even own ONE teeshirt. You have all of them!
I like the idea of a stripped down, capsule-type wardrobe, and that’s what I’m cultivating: two pairs of jeans, three pairs of black leggings, and a series of boho-style tops that can go with them. Add several cardigans of different weights, and that’s three seasons right there. Deciding what to wear each day shouldn’t be something I sigh about, you know?
This Is A Love Story…sounds like a book to read at a Certain Time. As in, if I read this at the Wrong Time, it could be really bad for me. Someone else I know just read Rubyfruit Jungle and felt really disappointed. It was hyped up, and she just felt like, “Really? This is…it?” I think I’ll pass, too, after your review was less than glowing as well. (Love the graphic for the book section of this post–I just ordered another book about President Lincoln to remind me that republicans used to be good, honorable, and moral.)
Hahaha I DO have them all! But I don’t have a single boho-style shirt, so you have me beat. I do love a cardigan too!
Nance, re: the books. YES. I was in the right place for that book but whoaaaaa nelly it’s a bit of a rough go in parts. The mother-son relationship is just so hard to read about, there is a postpartum depression storyline, and then, of course, she’s dying. So, caution! And Rubyfruit Jungle! I should have DNFed but I guess it didn’t take much time to read, it’s pretty short.
I love how you went from 76 to a potential 77 tees in the course of this post! Girl, that’s Impressive :)!! I don’t own many tees, I think that’s the one area you have me beat, Nicole. But oh, I think I own 100s of blouses from from the last 25 years!! It’s way more than one person needs. That’s so bad, right? I love most of them too… That’s my big predicament when I try to cull. Please give me some wisdom I can use.
Did you see Ann Patchett’s article on decluttering? https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2021/03/08/how-to-practice
My MIL gave A copies of the death cleaning book for Christmas and then again for his birthday. He did not like that at all. lol
I bought myself Dreamcount and then gave it away to someone–I need to remedy that stat. I heard Adichie talk about the book when it came out, and I think I know the high-profile clone incident you’re referring to…
Oooh I didn’t see that article, THANK YOU!!!
Maya, I admit when I was writing this I thought of you, because once you said you could easily go two months (I think?) without doing laundry, so I assume you have an even larger wardrobe than mine! And you do! I don’t have even one blouse. I mean, I used to, but they don’t really go with my life these days. Yoga tops – I have so many, and those I did purge this year. But I still have tons!
Oh oh oh, you need to read Dream Count and then report back!
I started Dream Count yesterday–loving it so far. (I won’t be able to read it straight through like you did and already jealous about that.) I really enjoyed the heck out of Americanah. I still think about “Ceiling.”
I have that on my TBR!
Thank you for sharing that article! I did enjoy it. PennyL in Dorset UK
And also FML… I lost one of my favorite Anthro blouses, and found it for resale on Poshmark, and now I’m always “just looking” and yearning for things and rationalizing that they’re not new, so it’s not so bad if I got just this one thing…
*note to self, do not look at Poshmark*
I am so envious that you love everything in your closet, 77 t-shirts aside!! I feel like I have a lot of clothes and while I like/love many items, I often still feel like I don’t have the “just right things”. Specifically with pants, which are my hugest struggle. I would like to have fewer pants but only items that REALLY work just perfectly on me- like a few pairs of jeans in different washes that go with everything, some COMFY and versatile pants for WFH that also go with dressier shirts that I could reach for and rotate, a few pair of leggings/joggers that are perfect, etc. It is hard to explain but I never feel like I have the “capsule” wardrobe thing down right- I have many items that don’t necessarily mix and match, or pants that are great for certain settings but are not really versatile enough and/or I don’t find them comfy enough for everyday, etc. Yet when I go through my clothes, many things are technically good, so I don’t want to purge them, either… though then I end up continuing to shop/look for things but struggle to FIND what I’m envisioning, so I may end up buying something that’s sort of “good enough” but not necessarily ideal, and then the cycle continues. UGH. I just have a hard time finding these unicorn clothing items I guess that I picture in my head.
Pants are very tricky! I think it’s why I bought so many this year, when I found a style/ size that worked, I just went to town on it. But pants are so difficult to fit! Women’s bodies are all so different, so it’s ridiculous that clothes are so homogenous.
I have been on a bit of a self-imposed clothes-buying hiatus unconsciously. I am really bad for buying stuff because I’m unhappy with how I look and I think the Next Perfect Item will make me feel better. Last year I did manage to keep it to things I needed to round out my wardrobe – sundresses with wider straps rather than spaghetti, for work, for example. I hate doing fast fashion, but sometimes I am weak.
I also have a giant stack of t-shirts, some from thirty years ago, and I DON’T wear them all, but I have trouble letting go of more than one or two at a time, which is not a fast enough rate given my age, lol.
I do try to concentrate on enjoying what I have, which is a lot of really good things, in clothing and elsewhere. It’s always a good reminder.
I know what you mean about fast fashion, and I try not to as well, but sometimes I will have a fast fashion piece last me over ten years, so maybe that isn’t fast fashion? I don’t know, it’s complicated. Like some of those Old Navy tanks last forever!
I just did a big closet clean out – but then bought some other new things. This morning I was feeling guilty about it – it was for sure more than $340 CAD, oh dear, so I felt supported when I opened this post! I need to be officially in a shopping hiatus too!! #shoppingtwins
Hahaha Anna, we are always on the same page!!
I have lots of tops in my closet that are really nice and I love them, but they don’t really go well with any of my skirts or pants. Then I will buy a new skirt or pair of jeans that don’t quite work either. I guess I’m not good at coordinating my wardrobe. I’m thinking of asking for a wardrobe consultation next time I go to Nordstrom. The nearest Nordstrom is about 900 miles away where my daughter lives, so I only go there when we visit her.
I didn’t know a wardrobe consultation was something you could do! That sounds like a really great service. We don’t have Nordstrom here, but I have visited when I’ve been in the states. It’s a nice store!
This ^ is me – didn’t finish typing my name and off it went!
Good luck with your shopping reset. After finding all the holes in my T-shirts when I was up in Noosa, I think I might need you to send me some of your extras … or I guess I will just have to buy some more. I usually shop in-store, so that takes a bit more effort than online shopping. I’ve put Dream Count on my TBR, thanks for the rec.
What is UP with those little holes? I just got rid of a bunch that had that. Yikes, that makes my situation sound even worse.
Well, I very definitely don’t have 76 (or 77) T-shirts. I have…3 white T-shirts and then maybe 8 other T-shirts. I don’t love T-shirts, TBH. I have exactly 2 tank tops!
Dresses are what I have more of than I need. I have a hard time saying No to a cute “new to me” dress when I go to consignment stores. I’m probably close to 20 or 25 (across the seasons) and that feels like way more than necessary. But…since I don’t own a ton of clothes overall, I do wear the same thing over and over again so I start to feel tired of it. Then I consign or donate the dress and it goes back into the second-hand world for hopefully yet another life?!
Oh see, I don’t wear dresses that often – but I don’t think 20-25 for four seasons is really all that bad. I SUPPORT YOUR DRESSES!!!
When we moved to our (old, drafty) house seven years ago AND I entered peri-menopause, I for the first time in my life was COLD. I had NEVER worn sweaters; suddenly I needed EMERGENCY SWEATERS. We moved in December, which means, retail-wise, winter was OVER, and I bought quite a few sweaters on excellent clearances. But then I found it difficult to STOP. The HUGE NECESSITY (followed by HUGE APPRECIATION) seemed to have wired my shopping instincts. I bought MORE SWEATERS THAN I COULD SENSIBLY WEAR. I ended up getting rid of a fair number of sweaters. The only thing that works for me is thinking (when I see a good sweater on a good price) “I have enough.” But it doesn’t work all the time; I still do keep acquiring. Sigh.
Oooh Swistle, that is a good mantra. I have enough! I mean, I have more than enough and also I LOVE SWEATERS TOO!!!
I thought you were kidding about seventy six! I mean, that sounds like a lot, but maybe it isn’t? I’ll have to count mine. Wait, maybe not. Now I’m thinking about my workout shirts, actual t-shirts, tank tops, nicer T-shirts (that I hang up) I might have more and I don’t want to know.
Nicole, the fact that everything in your closet fits and you enjoy it, well that is a LOT. I don’t think that has ever happened to me. Never.
What is time? I ask myself this all the time.
The Swedish death cleaning thing is a good reminder for all of us though….you know, after you clean out what you don’t want to hang onto, you’ll think hard about things you bring into the house. It’s a whole psychological thing, this being a human!
I was actually surprised at the number! And that doesn’t include tanks, yoga tops, sweaters…well. I have had so many of them for so long, so at least they are quality items!
IT IS SO HARD NOT TO SHOP. SO HARD. I have one million dresses but no separates…
It is hard Sarah! I have dresses but not that many and not really any for everyday.
I am SO curious as to where you even keep 76 t-shirts???
I vacillate between wanting to LOVE everything in my closet and feeling like, “It fits, is unstained, and covers all the bits it needs to cover” is good enough. There are things in my closet that I’m “meh” about, but it is still functional and unobjectionable, so I don’t feel the need to replace it or get rid of it. Or when I repeat outfits within a week, it feels a little workaday. But that’s okay. Maybe it’s kind of like food in a lot of ways – do I have to LOVE everything I eat? Or do I just have to get it into my body to keep me going? I suppose that’s perhaps a joyless way to live. I do love food and a cute outfit.
I love food and clothes too! I get all excited to get dressed in the morning. You might be too young for this, but there was a thing called Fashion Plates and I was obsessed with them as a child. Also paper dolls, essentially I am my own paper doll.
As far as where I keep them, I have built in cupboards and drawers, and I roll them the Marie Kondo way, so they take up two drawers.
I am envious of the storage space you must have to be able to keep 76 t-shirts! You are rich in storage.
If you really want to shop, feel free to shop for me. 😂
You know I totally would! *hops in car for road trip*
I do have a very good sized closet with built in drawers, I am very lucky! My old house in Calgary did not have great storage so my closet was bursting at the seams (probably a good reason to cull)
it’s really not terrible to shop clothes when they are needed and we feel good about it. We all go through those phases. But if it makes you feel better, then definitely give it a try.
My cloth habit is quite simple, buy many of the same teeth once I find the style I like, different colors, and replace them as they get worn. my favorite tees are from James Pearce and I have probably 10 of them.
It’s funny how we self impose things when others think it’s totally normal.
Oh, Coco, you are always so kind and empathetic! Thank you! I mean, I really DID need new clothes as I changed sizes. I probably have enough now!
That’s a lot of t-shirts! Haha! I think you are like my Dad; he has shirts from years ago, but they all bring him joy! But sometimes I will look at photos from 15 years ago and he will be wearing the same shirt as he is today! If they still fit, I say keep them. Also, I am a fan of finding something that works (pants especially) and buying several pairs. I do that a lot with running shoes, especially since they often change the version slightly, so if you find one that works, especially if it is on sale, I usually get a few pairs.
Kyria! Thank you for validating me – that’s exactly it, the things that do not bring me joy, I have gotten rid of, and now everything in my closet makes me happy! I used to buy the same type of running shoes when I was running – and I would be so bummed if they changed the style!
You and I really are on the same wavelength. I’ve been doing the 333 challenge-ish by reducing clothing I don’t really need or use. I want to enjoy what I have, and I realized I keep passing over the same tank tops, tee shirts, and pants every week—and I know this because I do the laundry every week. I wear the same shoes every single day, yet I probably have 20 pairs in the garage (where we keep them). I still haven’t gone through the shoes yet—I’m a work in progress. I love the idea of enjoying what we have and living mindfully. I want to appreciate this more in my day-to-day. Again—work in progress. 💜
I love the “you look happier” meme! I’m trying to read more instead of scrolling social media, and it’s definitely helping.
Hahaha as soon as I saw that meme, I was like “I feel seen.”
We are all a work in progress! But steps forward!
Very often when I read your blogs I think “Nicole and I are very similar”. But not this one. I do like to look nice and like everything in my closet. If I don’t feel comfortable wearing something, it goes. I do not enjoy shopping and hate malls. Do love thrifting and 90% of my wardrobe comes from VV or a consignment store. I do get a lot of compliments on my clothes. I wore a gorgeous Calvin Klein sundress to a wedding last weekend and many women told me they loved it. It was $39 at Value Village 5 years ago! I searched long and hard for a dress for my son’s wedding this summer (hit every store in 2 large malls- everything felt like fast fashion). I did not care what I paid but wanted to feel good. Found a beautiful dress at a consignment store!!
Pat, I think that’s awesome! I should do more thrifting – or, any thrifting as I never do. I bet you look amazing in everything and I’m so happy you got a gorgeous dress for the wedding.
Hi Nicole, thanks for the postcard! 🙂 Go easy on yourself, lovely lady, I really admire the effort you made to care for yourself and keep yourself feeling your best. When my body changed I took the opposite path and bought almost nothing, and find myself now with a dwindling closet of clothes and little appetite for facing the task of refilling it. The Adichie recommendation has intrigued me but I have three books going right now, so…
Yay, it got there! I got yours as well and was SO thrilled! Thank you, Tamara – I really did feel like getting clothes that fit was an act of self-care. Now to STOP buying clothes…
I think it’s awesome that you have so many cute t-shirts that you like and wear! I love t-shirts too. I used to sew all my t-shirts, but my size changed and I don’t have a pattern I like. Plus, the fabric choices for sewing them are pathetic. It’s actually way more expensive to sew one than it is to buy one! And yet, I loved sewing them because I never had itchy seams or tags! Am I rambling on about t-shirts? I think I am!
Michelle, that reminds me of a book I think you would love – I think it’s available on audiobook too – it’s called Unravelling. It’s a woman who, during the pandemic decides to make a sweater from scratch, as in shearing the sheep and everything. Okay, maybe that doesn’t sound fascinating but it WAS. Anyway, it was all about the effort and cost to go into one sweater. I was riveted!
One nice thing about my slow purge (at least one thing a day has to leave the house) is that I am finding things that I actually like. A top I hadn’t seen in a long time…I was going to donate it, but decided to wear it instead. A book that I was going to give away, and remembered how much I liked it…so I will read it at least one more time before giving it away.
I do have a lot of clothes that I don’t really like, and I’m weeding through those as well. It’s satisfying, though sometimes emotional – especially when it’s clothing and something I used to feel really good in, and now I don’t, or even worse, I can’t even get it on. Blah.
Ooooh girl. I feel that. It’s good to purge those items completely – I had a few emotional moments over some jeans, let me tell you.
76 shirts! My jaw dropped. I had to go and count up my shirts and I have around 25-30, since a few are in my laundry basket to be washed. I have a certain number of hangers in my closet and if I run out of hangers, then I need to purge some clothes. That’s my rule! It’s sort of like the 1 in/1 out rule because if I’m buying more clothes, then I need to get rid of stuff that I’m either not wearing much or don’t really love. That works well for me!
Maybe I need LESS storage? Lol!
How do you define “T-shirt”? Short-sleeved and cotton? Printed? Inquiring minds want to know. I have work t-shirts (short- and long-sleeved, plain, all black or grey with one navy per season) and also bumming-around printed t-shirts (also short- and long-sleeved). Some work with leggings, some show too much bum, etc. Do I use what I have? Absolutely. I think there’s something to be said for using what you have but also recognizing that updating clothes is a Fact of Life. 🙂
Anne, I define it as any shirt that isn’t a sweater or a structured button-top – so long or short sleeves (I didn’t include tanks or yoga tops in my count, because that would have taken it over the top), any material, printed or not printed. I guess most would be a cotton blend but I have some “sweat wicking” ones that I included in the count.
I love that you are finding joy in buying things that make you feel good, but I also like the philosophy of enjoying what you have. It’s such a balance, all the time! I have noticed lately that a LOT of my clothes are old. Like… older than my daughter old. And while there are some dresses I would love to fit into again, I don’t know that I ever will… or that they will be age-appropriate if I ever do, and I’m starting to wonder if maybe purging my closet of these reminders of youth and a smaller body would be mentally/emotionally cleansing? I love the idea of keeping quality items to wear for years! And… if I cannot/am not wearing them, maybe I need to say goodbye.
Suzanne – YES. There were a lot of things that were such good quality and I was sad to say goodbye to them, but hopefully someone else is enjoying them now. It is SUCH a balance!
Nicole, thank you for a great read!
I am on a spending freeze myself… I went a bit overboard in France with French skincare creams, and serums, and deodorants, and eau de parfum. I bought shampoo, and conditioner and lotion and lipstick. Sunscreen and more sunscreen. Soaps!
On the clothes front I was really tempted. Especially when we were in Paris. So many stores, so many unique (albeit expensive!!) pieces. I was salivating over blouses and skirts and shoes. And dresses, oh my gosh, dresses…
I think here is what I’m gonna do one day before I die- imma go to Paris, by myself, with an allotted budget, and I’ll blow all the money on clothes…
Ooooh Daria, that would be so hard NOT to go overboard! So many lovely things to buy in France! How wonderful for you!
