Category Archives: Hello Calgary

Fear of Flying, and turning into a flower

Posted on by

Ninety minutes ago, I considered sitting down to write, but instead sat on the comfortable couch for a few minutes. I promptly fell asleep to the tune of Roomba noisily vacuuming my floors for me – welcome to the future, Mrs. Jetson – and the kids playing the loudest game possible downstairs. I could hear them, through my dozing, excitedly yelling about whatever it was they were doing. I did not investigate.

I feel incredibly refreshed from this unusual and unexpected nap. Maybe it’s some kind of Friday the 13th voodoo going on. The bitter weather has suddenly broken, as it was apparently expected to, according to my mail carrier. I was chatting with him on Wednesday and he, positive and happy soul that he is, informed me that this was the END of the cold weather FOR THE WHOLE WINTER. I confess I looked at him with the kind of smiling face that you give a child who tells you that she is going to be a pony when she grows up.

Have I ever mentioned that there was a period in my childhood where I believed I would grow up to be a flower? Like, an actual plant. I clearly remember reading a story about plant cycles and becoming devastated on the discovery that I would die in the winter. This seems like it might be an allegory for my life but it isn’t, really. I guess I just really liked flowers and aimed to be one. I still like flowers, although it’s not my life goal to be a daisy or a rose anymore.

Speaking of blooming, I just finished reading Fear of Flying. I first read it in my twenties, and even then I did not find it to be the sexually liberating book that it is celebrated as. I didn’t remember it in its entirety, although I did remember grim details like I worried that I got the clap from having sex with all those uncircumcised Florentines. Ew. I found it much more interesting on a historical basis, as much of it takes place in Heidelberg, Germany in the 1960s, which would be a very strange place, post-war. There is much description about Europe in general at that time, and I am just going to come out and say it: I realize that the pendulum swings, and revolutions serve a purpose, but the Sexual Revolution and the concept of Free Love were both pretty gross. I mean, really. Not to mention the descriptions of the lack of hygiene WHILE having all this unprotected sex. Maybe it’s because I grew up in the 80s, when we were all indoctrinated about the importance of safe sex, but IMAGINE all the STDs. Or don’t imagine it.

There is a description about when the narrator has been camping on roadsides in Europe with the man she’s having an affair with. It has been QUITE SOME TIME since she’s showered, they have sex daily, and when she finally gets to an actual (seedy) hotel that has a bathroom, the dirt comes off her arms in streaks. But she can’t take an actual bath because she has her period and somehow does not have any tampons, so no bath for her. What? Why? Ew.

I have really talked about this enough and must change the subject, however gracelessly. Here, take a look at what I found at Superstore!

vanillafields-2

This takes me back to the early 90s, when I, along with many of my teenaged peers, wore vanilla perfume. We were like a horde of cookie-scented darlings.

coty-2

This brought back memories too! I think I got some of these for Christmas, back in the day. Who knew they still made them?

exclamation-2

I remember everyone who was anyone wore Exclamation back in junior high school, along with their Salon Selectives hairspray holding up their teased bangs. It went well with Levi’s 501 jeans and gargantuan sweatshirts from Beaver Canoe and Roots. Canadiana nostalgia!

In line with my New Year’s Goals/ Resolutions/ Whatever We Are Calling Them These Days, I am reading a lot more and am currently devouring Tamarind Mem. I had read it years ago and it is still wonderful. Bonus for local people: there is a big Calgary connection in the book, even though the mother refers to it as “Calgary North Pole place.” Anyway, it’s a gorgeous read – maybe not as groundbreaking and earth-shattering as Fear of Flying, but it contains no hygienic descriptions that make the reader shudder in horror.

Have a lovely weekend everyone! xo

Disney’s Hollywood Studios, Where I Connect With My Star Wars Alter Ego and My Longtime Muppet Love

Posted on by

Doesn’t everything feel a bit like a Herculean effort during the month of January? Yesterday morning was a feels like minus 32 with the wind chill kind of day, plus it had snowed overnight, sending traffic into one gigantic snarl, not that I’m battling traffic when I’m doing the school drop-off, but still. Just getting things done takes massive amounts of willpower: a) getting out of my cozy bed into my 16 degree house, b) getting into the freezing cold car to get to yoga, c) leaving the warm yoga studio to get back into the even-more-freezing car, d) getting out of the steamy hot shower, e) taking off the fuzzy robe to put actual clothes on in my chilly bedroom, and f) leaving the house several times a day to do various drop-offs, pick-ups, and errands. It takes a lot of effort and layering of clothing just to get through the morning routine around here.

Whenever I start to feel a bit sorry for myself in this cold climate that I am NOT suited for, I think of the Ingalls family, in their crappy little house in town. I mean, 16 degrees is nothing compared to sleeping in an unheated, un-insulated attic with only your sister’s body and a heated brick to keep you warm. It’s not like I have to undress in front of the stove, the only source of heat in the house, that is running on twisted pieces of hay. It’s not like my daily sustenance is one baked potato and a slice or two of bread. Winter life: it’s not so bad, really. Of course, comparing anything to the Ingalls’ way of life is bound to make you feel thankful for everything.

On that note, I have more to say about my Florida vacation. What? I know I’m stretching it out, but it’s JANUARY. If I don’t write about Disney’s Hollywood Studios, I’m going to be writing about how cold it is and how busy it was at the grocery store, my two usual January topics. You know you want to hear about my latest Costco experience. No?

 

img_6419-2

Me, in an attempt to look glamourous for Disney’s Hollywood Studios. Fun fact: I put this tank top on – containing a shelf bra – backwards, and wore it as such for a solid two hours before realizing that it was backwards, in what is the saddest commentary on my bosom ever. In fact, the only reason I realized it was backwards was that I noticed the lululemon symbol, which is normally on the back.

But I digress. No one wants to hear about my deflated state of affairs. Let’s talk Hollywood!

We went to Hollywood Studios the day after our epic Magic Kingdom day, which meant we were all a bit more tired than normal. We had planned for this, since Hollywood isn’t the biggest of the parks; in fact, we only walked 11.2 kilometers. Hollywood Studios is home to Aerosmith’s Rock and Roller Coaster, which is a blast – literally – and a stunt show starring Indiana Jones (not, obviously, the REAL Indiana Jones).

There is also the Great Movie Ride!

img_6426-2

This ride is so fun as it is set up like Mann’s Chinese Theatre, and while waiting for it to start a number of classic movie clips and interviews are shown. It’s very fun, and again made me wonder about the lives of the cast members involved in this ride. Basically, it’s a large tram that takes you through a number of classic movie scenes, narrated by a tour guide, and co-starring a gangster moll who hijacks the tram. I wondered how many times Aidan said “I’m your tour guide, Aidan, and I just LOVE movies!” in the course of a shift. I guess if you were an actor, maybe this would be a great on-the-side gig for you, but it WOULD get pretty repetitive. Would narrating the same thing every ten minutes with the same amount of enthusiasm lead to madness in the end? Only time will tell, I suppose.

Outside of the Great Movie Ride are the handprints and footprints of certain celebrities, just like in the real Mann’s Chinese Theatre. I tried my footprints against the Star Wars character who – according to my kids – most resembles me.

img_6428-2

 

img_6429-2

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen Who Framed Roger Rabbit, and I’m wondering if it would be suitable to watch with the kids. I think I was about 13 when I saw it, so maybe? Then again, that was in the 80s, and we all know “anything goes” back then.

img_6430-2

My kids have flipper feet.

img_6431-2

KERMIE! More on him later.

img_6435-2

Hollywood Studios is also home to all things Star Wars, and although we were told that the Storm Troopers do NOT pose for photos, we did manage to get a family photo with Kylo Ren. Meeting Kylo Ren was much more fun than I imagined, although not as much fun (and not as soft and snuggly) as meeting Chewbacca.

img_6433-2

 

img_6454-2

If it wasn’t insanely expensive, I would have made my husband buy this costume for (ahem) personal use.

img_6456-2

He wanted to buy this one though.

I have always been a big fan of the Muppets, and I was sadly disappointed when the new Muppet show was cancelled.

img_6475-2

Oh well, Kermie. We’ll always have Orlando. Here’s looking at you, kid.

It’s a Festivus for the Rest of Us.

Posted on by

I am BUZZING on caffeine. It’s 7:14, I’ve been awake for over three hours, and I have people coming over this afternoon. Whee!

Note: I say this like it’s something unusual but the fact is I am almost always awake around 4, so it’s just like a regular day, with the exception that it is December 23:

I’ve been on a bit of a tear this week, with baking too many things and cleaning way too much. On Wednesday, I had that feeling that all is a shambles and so I recruited the children for some good, old-fashioned housecleaning. You know the kind: scrubbing down the kitchen cupboards, cleaning behind the garbage cans, dusting all surfaces and baseboards, and re-sealing all the granite, all to the tune of “80s Yacht Rock” on Spotify. The children went along with it, probably in fear for their lives.

I am a very organized person and I’ve been “ready” for Christmas for a while – gifts purchased long ago, wrapped weeks ago, baking done (and consumed by the children, so this is more of an ongoing thing). However, purchasing groceries is not something that can really be done in advance, unless you’re into rotten vegetables and mouldy bread. So, yesterday I took a deep breath and went to Superstore.

Holy moly, even in the morning it was insane: the parking lot was packed, people were everywhere. I listened to Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch “Good Vibrations” on my way, just to get myself in the right head space. The only way out is through, I said to myself, as I breathed deep ujjayi breaths, maneuvering into a parking spot far from the entrance. I vowed to just smile at everyone I saw, to really embody the Christmas spirit.

The first person I smiled at was an old man at the cart corral. This led to a brief flirtation – what can I say, I’m irresistible to the septuagenarian set – and I noted that there were very few cars in the corral, an ominous sign. The old man wished me a Merry Christmas and said “I hope we all took our patience pills!” as we went in. I’m going in.

It was pretty crazy but I kept smiling like an escaped lunatic who just wanted some nice produce and also some Motrin and tofu. It doesn’t matter how long this takes, I kept thinking to myself as I tried to wheel my giant cart around a crowd of other carts and an employee with a giant dolly of items to restock, It doesn’t matter in the long run. I can be here all morning. What difference will it make? I did make it out, finally, and then I went to the liquor store along with – apparently – every old person within a ten kilometre radius. What is with all the elderly? This isn’t Co-Op.

One of my favourite wines, as I’ve said before, is Middle Sister. It speaks to me, as a middle sister (well, middle child and sister so technically Middle Sister is an accurate description). I love how they often change the labels. My favourite was “After waking up at Stupid O’Clock this morning, I’m looking forward to Wine O’Clock tonight.” which aptly describes every Friday of my life. But they’ve changed the labels again and this is my new favourite:

 middlesister2 

Santa Baby, just slip a bottle of Cabernet under the tree, for me. Been an awful good girl.

All of which is to say I am now completely “ready for Christmas,” food and all. There were many, many awful things in 2016, but there is much still to celebrate, and I hope you and yours can enjoy a peaceful, joyful, wonderful holiday season, with or without feats of strength and airing of grievances. xo

tree

ball

charlie

barkley

littlecreche

 

 

 

Is Rusty still in the Navy?

Posted on by

Today the 13 day cold snap has finally, finally, FINALLY lifted, and the temperature soared 20 degrees – still below freezing and with very high, cold winds, but 20 degrees nonetheless. I should not at all have been surprised, then, to see two people in shorts in the Co-Op parking lot. Shorts. In below-freezing weather. Oh, Calgary. So full of crazy people. Lovely people, too, since I took Barkley to the off-leash today and at least a dozen trees had been decorated for the holidays. So festive and pretty! Unfortunately some of the ornaments were flying off the trees due to gale-force winds but hopefully that can be put right on a calmer day.

It’s a good thing for Barkley that the snap has ended. Yesterday I went to take him for a walk around the block and he was so excited to get out of the house, he pulled on his leash as we were crossing the street. It was very icy and his unexpected pulling took me right off of my feet. I landed full-force on my left buttock/ hip and if I was elderly, I’d probably have broken something. As it was I probably looked like the star of a viral YouTube video, sliding around while trying to stand up, with the dog circling around me in a concerned panic. This is your fault, Barkley, now stop winding your leash around my body. Luckily no cars zoomed around the corner to run me over like a flattened cartoon of myself.

The kids are off school now; Friday was their last day. THE SIXTEENTH. I would greatly prefer them to be at school for a few days yet, but when I voiced this online I was chided for not thinking of the teachers and educational assistants, who might like a few days off pre-Christmas, or of families who travel for the holidays, or of ANYONE BUT MYSELF. It’s true. But this is the thing about public policy; it is, sadly, a zero-sum game. There is always someone who is more happy and someone who is less happy. And in any case, I have mental plans for the kids and I – for one thing, now that it’s not minus 30 the kids can go sledding. We also have some serious Christmas Vacation viewing to do, time to spend with friends, and Bailey’s to pour into my coffee.

Speaking of zero-sum games, my husband got an invitation for a special private screening of Rogue One on Saturday morning, and although I sighed at the thought of leaving our cozy warm house at 8:30 am in -25 degrees, it was well worth while. To be honest, I didn’t love the movie – although I know many people did, zero-sum game, different strokes, the world is a rich tapestry, etc. – but I did love seeing people I hadn’t seen since I left the natural gas industry nearly 13 years ago. Yes, I’m saying chatting in the lobby was my favourite part. I mean, the movie was fine and everything, I just didn’t love it. I enjoyed it more post-movie when I was chatting – in the lobby! – with my husband’s colleague, who explained a great deal of the missing links for me. “Oh!” I said, over and over. “Oh! I get it now! I just…what about the Death Star – oh! Oh, okay! Wait, now…what about oh! Okay!”

Me, watching Rogue One, apparently:

On Friday I baked gingerbread men for the boys to decorate when they got home from school, to kick off the vacation.

gingerbread1

As usual I gave them free rein with the frosting, and as usual we now have the weirdest assortment of cookies. Here are mine:

my-cookies

And here are the boys’ creations:

jakecookies mark-cookies

We are doing our gingerbread house tonight, so I’m looking forward to similar creativity.

I was teaching an evening yoga class last week, and my husband took that opportunity to sneak out and buy ten more light-up candy canes, to make me my very own double sided Candy Cane Lane. It was my lifelong dream to have a Candy Cane Lane and now I have one!

candycanelane

It cheered me immensely, since I was having a low-spirits day.

That’s probably enough said on that subject. As I said, it’s warmed up, I have Bailey’s, I have a Candy Cane Lane, I have delicious, weird-looking gingerbread cookies – what more could a girl want? May we all have such little joys, and the ability to sidestep the emotional landmines rampant at this time of year. xo

Finally Feeling Festive, and Universal Studios: Wilder, Faster, Scarier, and Wetter.

Posted on by

Normally I’m in full-on festive mode on November 1st, MAYBE November 2 if I’m exhausted from Halloween. But this year November didn’t feel very festive to me; too crazy, too busy, too sad. I was putting myself through the motions a little bit, but now after this weekend, I feel like myself again. It’s full on Nicole the Elf.

Friday was the first Friday night I have been at home since late August. So naturally, my husband had romantic plans for me: a trip to Canadian Tire. We bought a couple of strings of red Christmas lights to go with our icicles, light-up trees and animals, and other outdoor ornaments, plus two new extension cords. Woot. Then when we got home, he realized that we needed more clips for the lights, and recruited Mark to go with him. They came back with green spotlights, a light-up snowman and giant gift box, and eight glowing candy canes to make my lifelong dream of a candy cane lane come true. And they did get the clips as well.

My husband spent five hours arranging everything on Saturday, in the minus 25 degree weather, never once asking for my help, so there’s several stars on his heavenly crown. I made gingersnaps and we watched Love, Actually for the first time. Actually, I loved it!

Isn’t it funny how things like a movie or Christmas song can become combative and divisive? If you want proof that such things can be dramatically polarizing, just try mentioning Baby, It’s Cold Outside or Love, Actually. There are many arguments that Love, Actually is a terrible movie, and those arguments seem to be mainly based on the fact that it doesn’t show “real love” and isn’t “realistic,” has poor messages, etcetera. Have you SEEN the news lately? If anything is over-rated, it’s reality, and so when I watch a movie I want it to be as escapist as possible. I just want some good smooching scenes and a story line that doesn’t have anything to do with The End Of The World As We Know It, and therefore, I give Love, Actually two thumbs up.

Speaking of escapism, let’s talk Universal Studios!

We visited Universal Studios twice during our vacation, for a grand total of 18 hours and 29.6 kilometres of walking. Universal is, in the words of my husband, a lot more rock and roll than Disney. The rides are wilder, faster, scarier, and wetter. The big roller coasters: Hulk, RipIt Rocket, and Dragon Challenge all make Expedition Everest look like a children’s carousel. I am an intrepid roller coaster rider, and I actually thought I was going to black out on Hulk.

But the water rides, hoo boy. Last time we were at Universal, Mark went on a water ride called Dudley Do-Right’s Ripsaw Falls. He went by himself because the temperature was about 20 degrees and overcast and no one else wanted to get wet. He talked about it a lot, and since it was 30 degrees and humid when we were at Universal, Jake and I decided to accompany him. In my mind I envisioned something like Disney’s Splash Mountain – a few big hills with some splashing. I was not prepared for what happened. Fortunately – foreshadowing! – my husband decided to sit it out and hold my bag. The boys and I were getting on the ride when I asked the employee where I could sit to minimize getting wet. He looked at me with great amusement and said “It doesn’t matter. You’re going to be soaked.”

This turned out to be only too true. After a few splashy downhills, I started to curse Mark for coercing me into this. Then, as we were heading up a tall hill in our little log, I saw it: a waterfall that we were going to go through. An actual sheet of water. By the time the ride was over, my hair – which was in a bun – was plastered to my head, I had mascara streaks down my cheeks and on my chin, leaving only a few spikes on my actual eyelashes, and I was participating in my own personal wet t-shirt contest, the ONE DAY I wore a white tank top instead of a black tank top. Believe me when I say it was the saddest wet t-shirt contest ever.

If you love being clammy and wet for an entire day, I recommend this ride. Otherwise – maybe take a pass. I did see some young girls going on all the water rides, smartly dressed in bikini tops and little shorts, like the Florida veterans they were. I am not normally a “Daisy Dukes, bikinis on top” kind of girl, also being 41, but I tell you that I envied them, as my tank top clung to me clammily as the sun went down.

comics

Universal has all sorts of Marvel Comic rides – like the aforementioned Hulk, and Spider Man. It did make me wonder what would happen to those rides, now that Disney has bought Marvel. At any rate, the Universal employee costumes are much, much better looking than the Disney ones, as you can see here.

spiderman

stanlee

One of my favourite parts of Universal was Krustyland. If you’re a Simpsons fan, this is very fun, and all the employees are dressed in Krustyland red-striped sideshow shirts.

me

That’s me BEFORE the water ride.

surly

duff

If you’re lucky, and you time it right, you can even fulfill your lifelong dream of getting your photo taken with Krusty the Clown and Sideshow Bob. I had to wait until the second day to do this, but it was strangely exhilarating.

krusty

Don’t I look excited?

Of course, Universal is home to Harry Potter land, and I will admit something right now: I’m not a Harry Potter fan. I mean, I’m not NOT a fan, but I have never been interested in seeing any of the movies or reading the books. I live with three fans, however, and they were enthralled. Hell, I was enthralled too. The detailing is amazing and if you have passes to both sides of Universal – both Universal Studios and Islands of Adventure – you can take the Hogwarts Express between the two. We did that many times and it was really special.

train

signs

hogwarts

The train takes you between Hogwarts and Diagon Alley.

diagon

My mother-in-law had given the kids money to buy wands at Diagon Alley, and it was a really special experience. You do not just walk in, grab a wand, and pay for it. There’s a whole wand ceremony, and throughout Diagon Alley are spots to use the interactive wands. If the wand-holder does the “spell” correctly, it activates a display – a water fountain spurts, a bird starts flapping its wings, a hat floats into the air. It is well worthwhile for fans and non-fans alike.

The 3D adventure rides – there is one at Gringott’s Bank and one at Hogwarts Castle – are a lot of fun but beware! I felt a little queasy and nauseous at the Hogwarts one, which has you flying through the air playing Quiddich. As I mentioned, I have a stomach of steel for roller coasters but this one did make me feel a bit off.

On the other end of the spectrum is the Who-ville Land, all gentle rides meant for the Dr. Seuss set. I forced the kids to go on a couple of those rides and we actually got stuck for a few minutes on the Cat and the Hat ride. We were stuck in the living room, on a ride shaped like a couch, for probably less than five minutes, but with the continuous loop of children’s music it felt like a lot longer. It reminded me of a colleague of my husband’s, who was once stuck on It’s A Small World for 45 minutes. This was what she looked like afterwards:

Anyway, if you have little ones it is a nice, quiet part of the park. Plus, at Christmas it’s all decorated up.

grinch grinch2

At five o’clock on most days Universal hosts a parade, and if you’re there at Christmas, it is a copy of the Macy’s Thanksgiving Parade. We missed it by one day when we were there, but we had seen it on our previous trip, and it is a lot of fun.

snoopy

Ah, look at that outfit. I am currently wearing two sweaters, knee-length wool socks, jeans, and fuzzy slippers and I am FREEZING. It looks like it has warmed up to minus 13 (minus 22 with wind chill!) and I really should put on eight more layers to take poor beleaguered Barkley out for a walk. I also have teacher gifts to make (these, if you’re interested, and maybe some of this or this) because the last day of school is FRIDAY THE SIXTEENTH WHAT THE HELL SCHOOL BOARD. All of which is to say, my frozen fingers are signing off. xo

People are people

Posted on by

A cold snap has hit the city and it’s hit me especially hard since I just got back from a week in Florida on Sunday night. The past day and a half have been an absolute blur of writing, working, yoga teaching, housecleaning, grocery shopping, and laundry. Dear lord, so much laundry. A week in Florida was the longest time I’ve gone without doing laundry, and there was an absolute mountain of it. Today I put the fuzzy flannel sheets on the bed, making for an even six giant loads in the past 36 hours.

15241267_10153993022371512_5079588139603350204_n

But it was all worthwhile, this thudding back into reality. It was a great vacation which I’ll write about in more detail a little later. I don’t want to forget a thing.

I love travelling and I love coming home; I love meeting people and talking to people and people watching, and then I love coming home to my cozy little house filled with Christmas music and yummy, non-fried food. It’s really interesting, the people you see when you travel far from home. I mean, some people are more interesting than others, like the very drunk man who got escorted out of the Disney resort with no shoes nor shirt, only shorts that he had urinated in. I was outside reading, waiting for the Disney Magical Express to take me to the airport, when I noticed him being held upright between two Disney employees clad in white pants and brightly coloured shirts. It was 1:15 pm and you have to wonder, was he drinking at the Drop-Off Bar at the Big Blue Pool? How does one get that drunk at a Disney resort? Yes, there is a cacophony of children and tinny music, but is that any excuse to pee your pants? Sir, focus on making better choices.

On the other end of the spectrum was the emotional and heartfelt employee at the shop in the Orlando airport. My husband had given the person in front of us a penny (they still have pennies in the States!) so she could receive an even amount of change back, and the employee was so touched by his “generosity” that she discussed it with us for two solid minutes. I don’t mean to take away from his penny, but her gratitude exceeded what I thought was appropriate. Then, while I purchased breath mints and fruity Mentos, she chatted with me for several minutes about my accent (“Are you from Scotland or Ireland?” she asked, and seemed a bit disappointed when I said Canada.), my trip to Disney World, and her impending head cold. Meanwhile, the lineup behind me was increasing rapidly. The next person in line got similar treatment so I think that woman was in her element, working the cash register in the shop where she could meet and chat with people from all over the continent, and maybe even the world.

As a sidebar, I was purchasing breath mints and fruity Mentos as a last resort, as what I really wanted was gum for the flight. But – fun fact – there is no gum for sale in the entire Orlando International Airport. Gum cannot be acquired for love or money. The reason, as I found out from listening in to another conversation that the employee was having, is that there is carpet. Were people spitting their gum onto the carpet? I guess so. It must have been a large enough problem to do away with gum altogether.

All of which is to say that if you’re travelling in that area and you want gum, bring it from home. Just don’t bring any Kinder Surprises, if you know what I’m saying.

Speaking of contraband items, one of my very favourite things about Disney World and Universal Studios is that they really make sure no one is packing heat in the parks. I don’t know about you, but I find that incredibly relieving. Disney does a thorough bag check AND “random” checks with metal detectors. It’s not really random because both my husband and I received those checks on Wednesday night after we were running from the bus to the park entrance, so as to not miss our Fast Pass window. Our Fast Pass for Space Mountain expired at 6:50 and we got to the park at 6:35 so we were sprinting past the scooters and slow-moving foot traffic. Do not do this if you don’t want to seem like a suspect. I was happy to comply, of course. I’d happily go through a physical pat-down if it meant I could enjoy Big Thunder Mountain without worrying that there was a disgruntled/ angry/ unstable armed person around. Universal Studios does not do random checks – everyone goes through the metal detector, just like at the airport.

Another thing about Disney is that they issue “Magic Bands” to wear on your wrist, that can be synced with all your personal information, your phone, your passes, and even your credit card. It’s an incredibly efficient system, but at times it is a little startling. I was in line for Expedition Everest, when one of the signs that they change to keep things interesting flashed “Welcome Nicole!” It was both Big Brother-ish and kind of nice. I mean, it’s nice to be welcomed.

The elderly lady sitting next to me on the plane ride from Calgary was a little worried about not being welcomed in the Orlando airport. Her husband was behind her, a lesson for everyone to just pay the $10 so you can choose your seats, and she kept craning her neck around to shout conversation starters at him, which he did not seem to respond to. I don’t know if she was brand new to flying, or just super excited to get free refreshments, or both, but every time the cart came around she would order three different drinks, a hot one, a cold one, and water. When asked if she wanted cookies or pretzels she said both, every time, and then stashed them in her purse with an expression that showed her joy in scoring such treats at no cost. Throughout the flight she kept shouting to her husband “Three hours left!” and I would look at my watch and see that there was only two hours, but not think much of it.

The pilot announced that we were starting the descent into Orlando, and the lady went OFF. The flight was an hour early! Why was it so early! She checked her ticket and the time was WRONG on the ticket! The time of arrival was supposed to be 4:45 and here it was only 3:15! The airline messed up and now she was going to be waiting for AN HOUR at the airport because no one would be there to meet them! This went on for some time until her husband finally shouted back that it was 4:15 and she must have set her watch wrong when they landed in Calgary.

Oh.

I later saw them at the luggage carousel, happily with people who I assumed they were staying with. It’s nice when things work out like that.

*******************

The Friday before we left, I came home from teacher training to find that the boys and my husband had brought up the tree and ornaments from the basement, so we could decorate before leaving for Florida. It was the best surprise ever, and now my house feels wonderfully Christmassy. We bought a new tree this year, after several years of my husband putting the tree up and saying “We need a new goddamn tree, this one is terrible.” We couldn’t decide on white lights or coloured, and so we found one that has a white light setting, a coloured light setting, and a setting that cycles between the two. I love it so much.

15203160_10153985592211512_6258798570396751545_n

Oh, what’s that I’m holding? My teacher training certificate! It’s official now, and I’m as happy as can be. Plus, get a load of the tree! It’s gorgeous. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have some laundry to fold. xo

Nicole’s Favourite Things: It’s The Little Things Edition

Posted on by

We said goodbye to my father-in-law this week. He passed away after a long illness and will be very much missed. To many people he was a larger-than-life character, the life of the party, a legend, but to me he was the man who welcomed me into the family with open arms. He and I spent a lot of time sitting together on the deck, sipping Palm Bay and chatting. Sometimes we would just sit in companionable silence.

So it’s been a sad and stressful few weeks. Have you ever noticed that when you’re having a sad and stressful time, it’s the little things that do you in? Silly things like discovering that the boys’ non-jean-pants were all three inches too short, and that I accidentally put a hole in my brand-new black medical grade support stockings were enough to make me want to curl up in a ball on the floor. It’s funny how the little things can get you down when there is a world of much bigger things going on.

But just like little things can get you down, little things can also lift you up, and so I’m concentrating on all the happy, joyful, and ridiculous things that are going on in my world, right now.

How Much Are The Posters

It feels like a lifetime ago, but the Book Fair was just last week and we raised $3600 for the school library, as well as the ELL and home reading programs. Even more notably, the New Book Fair Lady did it all herself – I only had to work a couple of shifts and count money – and she did a fabulous job (HI HAYDEE). This is my second last book fair, and, happily for me, the shifts I worked were extremely poster heavy. It seemed everyone wanted a poster, but more importantly, they wanted to know how much were the posters. Haydee had put up signs all around and yet I was asked the question an incredible amount of times. Perhaps Scholastic has been reading this blog, because they sent three times as many posters as they normally do, and so not only was I asked was the kitten poster five dollars too, what about the one with doughnuts on it, and the one with Rey from Star Wars, was that five dollars too, I also had to search through three giant boxes to find the appropriate one. Not that I’m complaining. I’m going to miss those questions one day. Maybe.

posters

Notice the slightly passive-aggressive wording – “EACH!” – at the bottom. Yes, each. Each poster is, in fact, five dollars.

 

A Celebration of Superior Workmanship

My friend Lynn (HI LYNN) wrote a post wondering if shopping at Costco does indeed save you money, and oh, Lynn. How much time do we have? Not enough. In short, I shall direct you to my post from nearly three years ago, The Stages of Costco, which is something all of us membership holders need to go through. I STILL have the plastic wrap I refer to in that post from January 2014.

But what I really wanted to talk about was the fellow who packed my cart, the last time I was there. In the spirit of there are no small parts, only small actors, I appreciate very much when someone puts their all into their job, no matter what that job might be. And so I say bravo to the Costco employee who packed my cart in such an amazingly efficient way that I not only complimented him on a job well done, but also pointed it out to the elderly fellow who checked my bill upon leaving. Longtime readers might be amused to know that the bill-checker at the door was the same one who flirts with me by saying that redheads are his favourite, and he loves my smile. Aw. Flirting with elderly men while shopping for groceries is my favourite too!

Look at this cart! It’s a thing of beauty. Well done, sir. Well done.

cart cart2 cart3

Sailors Take Warning

This time of year can be a wee bit depressing, what with the sun setting at 4:30 in the afternoon and not rising until after eight in the morning. But occasionally the sunrise will make up for it all. Now, even in the midst of summer I am up before the sunrise, but there’s something about the cold winter morning sunrise. The other day the entire world was bathed in pink – sidewalks, frosty lawn, it was all pink.

img_6097

img_6098

Do I Need A Title?

I have been very very good about not buying myself anything since Kondo-ing my house, but I am still of the old-school people who use paper agendas, daytimers, and calendars. While I was Christmas shopping a few weeks ago, I saw this and decided I needed it to hang by my desk for 2017.

img_6092

We learn from the horses, people. Strength does NOT come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will. Let us all learn from the yogi horses.

Usually I have a Canadian landscape calendar by my desk, but that was before I knew about Horse Yoga.

Get Your Asana In Gear

I am a mere 36 hours away from becoming a Registered Yoga Teacher, and to celebrate, my husband bought me two t-shirts. I wore this one to Yoga for Stroke Survivors yesterday, a class my friend Sharyl (HI SHARYL) has been teaching, and that she has graciously allowed me to assist with.

img_6133

Honestly, it is my New Favourite Shirt Of All Time.

New Toothpaste (Not An Ad Nor Sponsored)

You know what’s ballsy? Buying toothpaste at Costco. Well, let me rephrase that: buying NEW, UNTRIED toothpaste at Costco. It’s a real commitment; you could find yourself brushing your teeth for the next four months with sub-par toothpaste. I have done that before, suffered through a toothpaste flavour I abhorred just because I had four tubes to work my way through. Thinking of it now, I should have just donated to the drop-in centre or food bank, but hindsight is 20/20 people. Anyway, I usually buy a four pack of Crest 3D Whitening, because coffee, but I rolled the dice and purchased this:

toothpaste

It is like having my teeth massaged by minty fairies. It’s like having a haven of freshness and white teeth and unicorns and happiness, all in one little tube. I mean, do these look like the teeth of someone who regularly drinks 8 cups of coffee each morning, plus red wine on the weekends?

img_6091

Ah, it’s the little things. I have also been trying out a new eye cream, but that is a whole other post. For now, I’d like to know what little things make YOU happy? Tell me everything. xoxo