Lettuce pray.

This morning I got home from yoga a bit earlier than normal, at about 6:20, and this is what my back yard looked like:


One hour later I took “weed the garden” off my to-do list.


Well, the snow’s stopped now and I’m sure it will be melted by the time I pick the kids up after school. I’d be more upset about it but really, we’ve had such a mild winter and a beautiful spring that it doesn’t seem to be getting me down at all. Maybe that’s because I have a new secret admirer.

Last week I received an email, from someone amiably named “Birky Tony”:

Hello,Am so sorry to have intrude in your privacy i sincerely like your profile picture on facebook it really caught  my attention. hope you don’t mind us knowing each other much better?.My Name is Birky, I’m from Austin texas.Am a 9 years widower,I live with my pet dogs.I am a Man with sense of humor,I am passionate and romantic,I have the fear of God in me, I have respect for my fellow human being.! It will be wonderful of you to send me a feedback if you want us to get along and know each other.I promise to make you happy and always put a smile on your face.Thanks and Cheers!


It’s nice to know I have options, especially with regards to a person who has respect for his fellow human being, but apparently no respect for rules of punctuation and grammar. Any moment now, Birky is preparing to send a photo proving his masculinity, I just know it.

Did you have a nice weekend? I was much, much busier than normal, but in a good way. We all went to see Avengers: Age of Ultron on Saturday, and I found it to be even more of a snore than I normally find those types of movies. Zzzzz. I mean, really. All those men and the only one we see shirtless is Bruce Banner? THIS IS AN OUTRAGE. I enjoyed a) seeing Captain America in a tight t-shirt chopping wood, b) the on-screen romance between Natasha and the afore-mentioned Dr. Banner, and c) recognizing that Hawkeye’s pregnant wife is actually Sylvia from Mad Men. Other than that, I mostly thought of other things during the long, long movie that seemed to never end.

But I’m not the target audience, am I? It’s not like Joss Whedon is writing movies for people like me, but still, it would have been nice to see a little shirtless action.

And, of course, it was Mother’s Day, and I hope all you moms out there had a great day. Well, I hope everyone reading this had a great day, but you know what I’m saying. I got two awesome cards that I had spied in backpacks last week, a gorgeous blue Le Creuset canister to hold all my cooking utensils – huge improvement on the previous situation, in which I was constantly jamming in my numerous spoons and whisks and occasionally swearing about it – and a matching spatula! It was almost as exciting as last year’s giant bag of dirt, which is really saying something.

I say that without irony, by the way. I really was thrilled about my giant bag of dirt. The gardens are looking great this year already – and will look even better when the snow melts, I’m sure.

And speaking of gardens, my indoor grow lights are really paying off, and no, not like that. Look, it’s my first harvest!


It’s mostly leaf lettuce, but there’s a bit of spinach and arugula in there as well. I’m pretty excited to plant more, because it was amazing. And it only took five weeks of concerted effort!


  1. I planted kale last fall, too late, I guess because it never grew but never died either. It grew a little this spring but now it’s bolting and flowering, with not even enough leaves for one salad. The leaf lettuce we planted this spring is doing a little better.

  2. Aruuuuuuuuuugula. I love that word. Far more exciting than our British equivalent, rocket. Aruuuuuuuuuuugula!

  3. Birky is not from Austin, TX. I’m about 100% certain. Why? Because Austin is a book buying, literacy loving, keepin’ it weird city and I would eat my 10 gallon hat if it produced a single Birky. 😛

    Wow! That lettuce looks so good! Cool!

    If it doesn’t warm up soon we might need to install some grow lights outdoors. 😉

  4. james howard says

    Hello have friend she got email from tony birky did you get pictures and what info do you have.

    • TamiJo Bartell says

      I also received emails from Tony Birky. I want to know if he’s for real or just totally not a nice guy. I’ve been divorced for three years & I don’t want to get into a bad situation. Please let me know. Thanks

  5. My mother recieved emails from the same person! Same message too! Do you have any details?

  6. I also get a mail from this Tony Birky. I think he is a big netscammer.


  1. […] end things on a fun note, remember when I got a message from the “passionate and romantic” Birky Tony, wanting to get to know me better and to put a smil…? Well, apparently my lack of interest in poor Birky means that maybe I’m a man, because I […]

Leave a Reply