Hairum Scarum

The thing about moving is that, once a person has moved, there is still so much paperwork to deal with, there are still so many decisions to make, and there is so very much to learn about the new environment. Moving across provinces, I am discovering, means that much time must be spent in a variety of government and other official offices and on their websites, just getting the basics figured out. In the past three weeks, for example, we have spent countless tedious hours just getting all of our driver’s licenses switched, organizing registrations, plates, and insurance for all five vehicles plus the RV, why do we have so many vehicles, why do we have an RV, and switching our health care from Alberta to BC.

It’s quite exhausting and every day I think of something new to add to the running list: I need to get Rex licensed, for example, and I need to find him a vet, having already found him a good groomer and boarder. I don’t think it will be hard to do these things, but all takes time.

Other things I do not have figured out: medical and dental care. I’m not at all worried about finding a dentist, they are everywhere and all seem to be accepting new patients, but there is a massive physician shortage so I feel like I’ll be lucky to get one before I turn 65. Just don’t get sick, I guess. There are plenty of walk-in clinics, if I do get sick, and on the plus side, a friend told me that a doctor referral is not necessary for a mammogram, unlike in Alberta; apparently, I can just simply book one. But then, that’s one more thing added on my massive to-do list, and my dense, lumpy breasts and I are due for one in October. Guess what! It IS October!

Before my husband retired, I used up all his optical benefits to get my eyes examined and new reading glasses. This is something I have been putting off for years, for no good reason. Can I blame it on the pandemic? In any case, finding an optometrist was easy – I looked for the closest one with the highest Yelp rating – and due to the time of year, they were having a back to school sale. I ended up with Dolce and Gabbana reading glasses, and with the sale and the optical coverage, they were very low cost.

I feel fancy!

Speaking of my husband’s retirement, at his party I was chatting with a woman who will be relocating in the next six months or so, to one of four locations, as yet undetermined, but the move will either be cross-country or out of country. She was, naturally, quite anxious about all the logistics involved in such a move and said to me plaintively I just don’t know how I am going to find someone to cut my hair. Girl, I know. I KNOW! I related so much because of all the myriad things I had to deal with upon arrival, finding someone I could trust with my delicate locks was top of the list.

It’s just such an intimate relationship, isn’t it, the one between hair stylist and hair stylee. There is so much trust involved, and then there are personalities that need to be able to mesh, not to mention actual hair styling talent. When I find a stylist I like, I hold onto them like grim death. I very briefly considered going back to Calgary every three or four months to get my hair cut, but that seemed ridiculous even for me, and the logistics involved were stupid.

So began my search for a stylist.

The first part of my search began, interestingly enough, back in July, when I was very new to town. I made a sugaring appointment at a local place; there are a couple of sugaring salons in town and I chose this one purely because their online booking process was easy and one I was familiar with. The first body sugaring place I tried had an incredibly difficult booking process which required the download of an app, and then it was tricky to find the actual place on the app itself, and I ended up deleting it all in frustration and going with the other, slightly less conveniently located option. It probably says something untoward about my character that while I am distressed at the thought of someone new taking scissors to my hair, I have absolutely no problem exposing my unclothed fuzzy vulva to a complete stranger, speaking sugaring code like can we also do the back, and that my choice of person for this service is made merely by their location and ease of booking process.

In any case, in late July I found myself half-naked with a lovely young woman named Kate, chatting about being brand new to town, the stress of moving, and how it was bathing suit season and what kind of cut did I wear? Kate herself had moved here from a small coastal town, and referred to Kelowna as the hustle and bustle of the big city, which made me smile, as I had the opposite experience. When we were finished, she kindly asked if there was any way to help me feel settled, if there was any information she could share with me. I told her that I was looking for a hair stylist, did she have any friends who she could recommend?

She did, saying cheerily to my express concern about needing a stylist who was well-versed in aging, thinning, brittle hair, that, in addition to servicing all her friends, Abi cuts my mom’s hair! Well. I could certainly be Kate’s mom’s age, but the image I had immediately was a no-nonsense style favoured by senior ladies everywhere, and I felt a little disheartened. However, I accepted the contact information, and was a little taken aback to see that it was a) an Instagram handle, and b) that Instagram handle was Abi Gives Good Hair.

And you guys, I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t pick up the phone to make an appointment with Abi, who Gives Good Hair, partially because of the Instagram handle and partly because I visualized the clientele as being two-pronged: on one hand, the cute young things getting their beachy waves, who were featured on the Instagram feed, and on the other, the moms. This was probably an unfair assessment on my part, but it’s the truth, and so the weeks passed and my ends became more and more frayed.

Finally, feeling desperate, I reached out to my lovely friend Sammi (HI SAMMI) for help. You may be wondering why I did not reach out earlier, since Sammi has been an extraordinary resource in this move, helping me feel welcome, introducing me to people, and also recommending her very excellent nail salon, which is everything I want in a nail salon. The reason is that the woman who cuts Sammi’s hair is known to be a bit brusque and gruff, and I have been feeling a little emotionally fragile, worried that I would be judged for colouring my own hair or for too much heat styling or for having crunchy, uneven ends.

And of course, this ended up being not the case. This woman was truly wonderful, giving me possibly the best haircut I have EVER had in my life, asking me very thoughtful questions about my hair and its history, and not once criticizing or judging my hair choices. I did not find her brusque but did find her extremely efficient, as I was in and out within a half hour, and the moral of the story is that sometimes a person has to take the risk to get the reward.

Weekly Reading

Probably the most exciting development, other than finally getting my hair cut, was that since I have official BC identification in the form of a driver’s license, I was able to obtain a library card! I immediately put a stack of books on hold, and, while I waited, I picked up an old favourite.

Emma. I love this book so much! I so identify with Emma, although now I’m over twice her age. This book is brilliant – romance, hilarity, class introspection…it has it all. It is maybe one of the funniest of Austen’s collection, as the side characters are absolutely hilarious and relatable; don’t we all have a gabby Miss Bates in our lives, or a ridiculous Mrs. Elton, isn’t everyone related to a Mr. Woodhouse, with his anxious hypochondria and his refusal to allow for any other point of view? Such a great book.

The Swimmers. The first of my library books was a winner, albeit an absolutely heartbreaking and incredibly moving winner. This novel is essentially a love letter from a daughter to a mother with dementia. I do not tend to be a crier when I read, but this book made me well up several times.

In other news – what could top a hair cut and a library card, you may wonder? – our dear blog friend Elisabeth is back! Check out her new site, Optimistic Musings of a Pessimist. All of this is a great way to start a fresh new month, and I wish you all a happy first week of October. xo

A New Chapter

I was thinking a lot about the last chapter in A Tree Grows In Brooklyn this week, when Francie goes back and looks at her neighbourhood, wanting to remember it just as it was. This week I was in Calgary again, for forty hours, and it was so interesting to see it from new, non-resident eyes.

Even for a short trip, there is just so much to do to prepare, isn’t there? My parents drove back through to spend the night in Kelowna on Monday, and then Tuesday was a flurry of laundry and groceries for my younger son for the week, and taking Rex in to the boarder’s. Before I move on, let’s just acknowledge that everyone with pets knows the particular and unique stress of leaving their beloved fuzzball behind. I will say that Rex has done great with boarding in the past, but this is a new place, and I follow this place on Facebook, and was a little bit stressed and anxious when there were photos of the various dogs posted but not one was Rex. He’s THERE, right? I said to my friend Jen (HI JEN) who graciously hosted me and my husband in her home. Like, if he was dead or gone or sick they would have told me, right? Like I’m not going to get there Saturday and they are going to say “Oh sorry, Rex isn’t here, he died.” She assured me that IN ALL LIKELIHOOD I would have received at least a text if something dire had happened. My husband suggested I call to check in, but my thinking is that one should not ask a question if one is not prepared for all the answers. If he wasn’t well, what was I going to do? Be stressed and tearful for the remainder of the trip? This felt like the recent time that a woman was at my house for a social event, and I casually threw out a you’re okay with dogs, right? as my big buffoon wagged wildly. No, not really, she said, at which point I was completely at an impasse. What to do? Don’t ask questions if you don’t want the answers. Anyway, with regards to the pet resort, I took some ujjayi breaths and assumed no news was good news, and in the end, that was absolutely the case.

But back to the trip. My sister-in-law drove me to the airport so that I arrived two and a half hours before my fifty minute, domestic flight was due to leave, on my request, because I am secretly this guy:

My husband, let the record show, thought this was an insane move on my part, particularly since my flight got delayed, but let me tell you, it was incredible. I was travelling by myself, with no one else’s schedule to accommodate, the dog was safely being cared for by someone else, and I had nothing to do but read for hours and eat at Subway. What could be better, I ask you? I think I was the least-stressed person in the entire airport, as I was completely untethered and without any obligations or commitments. The people seated next to me on the plane were nearly hysterical as they missed or were probably going to miss their connections, due to the delay, but I was as zen as could be. What is time, anyway?

My husband picked me up at the airport, and the city was gloomy and cold and drizzly, and it turns out that after two months in small-city, slow-paced Kelowna I was unused to the massive traffic snarls in Calgary, but still in my zen state I was completely unbothered. The next day, though, YYC pulled out all the stops. September in Calgary can be really beautiful; the leaves were as yet still on the trees and were beautifully golden, and the sky was so blue.

I had an entire day at my own disposal while my husband and friend were at work and her kids were at school; I went for a long walk, alternating between looking at the cute little shops in Kensington and the cute little old houses in Hillhurst Sunnyside. I would never want to live in a pre-war house, what with the newspaper insulation, wonky electricity, lead pipes, and complete lack of closet space, but I love looking at those houses and imagining the lives of the people in them. I especially enjoyed looking at all the lovely tiny yards with gardens, particularly one that was filled with gnomes.

My people!

It was just so incredible to have a day in which I had absolutely no responsibilities, no one to take care of, and nothing to do. I was able to write, and read, and walk, and I still had many hours of the day left. I don’t know if I can adequately describe how therapeutic this was for me, after months and maybe even years of just frantic doing-ness, but I was filled with pure joy and contentment. It was fun to see Calgary through non-resident eyes, but I will say that I found it a little emotional – I used to take the kids to that park! Remember the wading pool! They loved this playground! – and I think it’s easier, now that they are adults, to NOT be where they grew up. I felt very Landslide-y, which I do not feel much in my new home. Maybe it’s the bandaid-ripped-off concept of changing every single thing all at once.

Speaking of changing every single thing all at once, there was a very special reason that I was in Calgary, and that is that I was attending my husband’s retirement party! My husband officially retired last Thursday, and I nearly bought him a t-shirt reading “I tried to retire but now I just work for my wife.” NEARLY. Anyway, there was an amazing dinner for him, surrounded by his colleagues who I have gotten to know quite well over the years, and it was a really wonderful experience.

The next day we drove our hostess-with-the-mostess out to Banff, to meet up with her husband and spend the night before heading home. We had just the best time with our friends, having drinks and dinner and then more drinks, walking through Banff and browsing through little shops. These are our friends who are more like family, who I love so very much, and it was so great to spend time with them. It was also great being in Banff; the larches were changing, the temperature was crisp but not terribly cold, the mountains were show-off gorgeous, and we were staying in the beautiful Rimrock hotel, which in itself a treat.

The following morning we drove back to Kelowna, and I pretty much wanted to just collapse from exhaustion, but we had tickets with friends (HI SAMMI) to see a performance of The Piano Man and The Rocket Man that evening. I am SO glad we went, it was so much fun to see a tribute to two of my favourite performers, and Sammi had booked us tickets very close to the stage, which was just great. The two of us girls bonded by crying through Candle In The Wind, which I would have been much more stoic about had they not flashed images of Princess Diana on the screen. My girl! The people’s princess!

The rest of the weekend was mostly just spent getting my life organized and put back together, and also spending time with Rex, who was not dead and who also seemed to really enjoy his new pet resort, even if they didn’t flood their Facebook page with his photos. What a missed opportunity for them! His smiley face could have been the best free advertising ever.

Weekly Reading

The Dutch House. First of all, Ann Patchett. What can you say about Ann Patchett except that she’s an absolute gift to this world. What an incredible writer she is. This book is one of the most satisfying and wonderful reads I have ever experienced and you guys, that is saying something. It’s an absolutely perfect book. It’s about family and home, the complexity of relationships and the responsibilities we take on. It’s about forgiveness, and rage, and how people change and yet somehow stay the same. I am absolutely uplifted by this book and also astonished at the sheer genius and quality of the writing. This was a work of art, and is everything I love about books.

It has, obviously, been a very action-packed, busy, fun-filled week, and I am looking forward to a calmer and probably more productive week. I hope you all are enjoying this beautiful month of September. xo

Dog and (Social) Butterfly

Although I have seen all of the Feuding Dog Park Men separately a few times, I have not seen them all together since The Incident, and I’m able to give them a nod and closed-lip Mona Lisa smile without being drawn into conversation with any of them. I did, however, get knocked off my feet by a large hound who, inexplicably, came running full speed into the back of my knees. I actually had some air time before landing on my left hip and right elbow and I am going to be grateful for my sons for nagging me about strength training, because I broke nothing. My hip still hurts, a few weeks later, but my doctor’s warning about osteoporosis was not for nothing; I guess my bones aren’t crumbling, thanks to my loathed-but-practiced strength routine and, probably, calcium-rich smoothies. The owner of the hound, a slow-moving elderly man, was horrified and apologetic, and Rex will not let the hound get within ten feet of me. When that dog is at the park, Rex is by my side, barking and growling if the dog gets too close.

Other than that, Rex is very friendly and playful with all the dogs we meet, particularly a three-legged doodle delightfully named Trio, and an actual trio of Bernese mountain dogs. His people! He’s halfway to being part of the group! Also, imagine what that owner’s house, back yard, and monthly dog food bill looks like. God bless, is all I can say.

Speaking of his people, we saw Rex’s doppleganger, Willie the other day, and it was just as cute as the first time. Rex’s social life has been very good of late.

A loose goal that I had created for myself on moving here and starting a new life with very few constraints or commitments was that I would say yes to everything I could, in terms of social engagements and new experiences. So far, this has really paid off in meeting new people, reconnecting and deepening my existing friendships, and generally making my life a lot fuller and more fun.

The past ten days have been a whirlwind of social activity, including a Girl’s Night at my house, a party at which I went in knowing zero people but ended up having a great time, and a mid-week visit from my parents. Having houseguests, sandwiched by parties, has been very fun and feels like a holiday, with big meals and lots of wine and dessert. Now, am I tired today and possibly in need of a cleanse and a liver detox? Yes I am. Do I desperately need to catch up on regular life, including massive amounts of laundry? Yes I do.

After these years of pandemic living followed by several months of packing and moving stress, I feel like my social life, along with everyone else’s on this planet, has taken a massive hit. I recently stumbled across an article about how having kids ruins your social life, and it felt like reading about a whole different world, one I could barely remember, with small children and playgrounds and simmering resentment between parents and non-parents. Clearly I am not the demographic for the original piece, which was written by, I believe, a woman in her thirties living the New York child-free lifestyle, ruing the changes in her friendships, but I read the entire article nonetheless, with interest similar to that of a social anthropologist examining an exotic group of people.

I do think that having children does vastly change one’s social life, for the simple reason that it is very difficult to go anywhere or do anything with small children, but in a way it actually improves one’s social life, as it is so easy to meet people when you have similar-aged children. If I was a woman, like the article’s author, going out five days a week in New York City, clubbing and eating at new restaurants, having leisurely boozy brunches on Sunday mornings, then I would absolutely agree that children wreck everything. Imagine paying for a babysitter for all those parties and taking small children to a fancy brunch; that would be nightmarish and expensive. However, even in my twenties I wasn’t a person who went out clubbing five days a week and now, close to fifty, the idea of going clubbing at all sounds dreadfully exhausting. Maybe if the club started at 2pm and ended at 7 I would be interested, but I’m fairly sure no such thing exists outside of nursing homes.

All of which is to say it isn’t my children that have suffocated my social life; if anything, the vast majority of my Calgary friends were ones who I met simply by having kids in the public school system; there was always a committee or school trip that needed volunteers, and of course, I was friends with the moms of my kids’ friends. So I did wonder what would happen, moving here, when I didn’t have school aged kids or a yoga studio or any of my other Meeting People Situations to rely on, that I have had my whole life. I wondered if I would have a hard time meeting people but so far this has not been the case; I have already met so many fun and interesting people who have been open and welcoming. Perhaps they too are tired of Lame Pandemic Social Lives and are willing to embrace new people; it sure feels that way.

Weekly Reading

Hello Beautiful. I do not have sisters, so I have always been fascinated by sisterly relationships and dynamics. I also love a book that has complicated families and strong female characters, and I did like this book. However – and this is a Me Problem, not necessarily a This Book Problem – it is a modern retelling of Little Women, and I am NOT a fan of the modern retelling of anything, particularly when it comes to a beloved-by-me classic. I have read Little Women a few dozen times; it was a very formative book for me as a child, and I have reread it many times as an adult. And so I will say that this coloured the book for me, and not in a positive way. I felt like it tried to draw too many parallels to Little Women in too many obvious ways, although I did like the portrayal of the parents. Louisa Alcott’s father was much loved by her but famously useless; he was a friend of Thoreau (do NOT get me started on that guy, I cannot EVEN with Thoreau), and he burned through their money, necessitating Louisa’s very hard and constant work so he could basically Find Himself, and I felt that the fictional portrayal in Hello Beautiful was spot on. I also liked that the author took Marmee’s hidden anger and unhid it, in the portrayal of the girls’ mother. Overall I liked this book but didn’t love it, however, your mileage may vary.

My parents’ visit was timed to coincide with my younger son’s 18th birthday. I am officially a Mother of Adults, which makes me feel very Adultish myself. Landslide, etcetera. I read somewhere, years ago, that adolescence exists to help kids make the break into adulthood, but I think it must also exist to serve mothers too. I really loved – and still love, both boys are still in their teens – the teen years, and it’s an extremely satisfying feeling to know that I’ve shepherded them all this way and now I can step back. I mean, I guess I have been gradually stepping back throughout their adolescence, but it feels different now. Your children are not your children is something I think about a lot, especially these days.

So it truly feels like a whole new chapter, and there is more news to come after this week, which is going to be so hectic and busy. More about that later, and in the meantime, I hope you all have a beautiful week. xo

Five For Friday: The Faces, Friends, Fire, and Family Edition

  • Nobody Panic. It was so fun to read everyone’s responses to the dishwashing, face washing, cookbook post. The very next day, the Nobody Panic podcast released an episode called How To Wash Your Face, which made me wonder – do they read this blog? No. But it was a fun coincidence anyway. Not to completely spoil the episode, but the theme was “Should you do this too? I don’t know, I don’t know your face! We all have different faces!” which is just how I feel! All our different precious faces require different methods of washing!
  • Girls, Girls, Girls. Last Saturday my sweet friend Sammi (HI SAMMI) hosted a girl’s night, and she included both me and another woman who had also just moved here four weeks ago. Everyone was so lovely and I met so many fun women, including someone who also lives on a large piece of property which includes her in-laws’ home. MY PEOPLE. Second only to the laughs and great company was the food: it was an appetizer-and-margarita night, which is a winning combination for me. I love making a dinner out of appetizers; to quote Juliet Litman, my ideal way of dining is Dips and Desserts. We all brought something and everything was so delicious; one woman brought bruschetta made exclusively from her garden items, which made me so excited to start my own garden next year. I am a Girl Who Needs Girls, and so it was so wonderful to be included into the circle. It reminded me of something I heard recently about Victoria Beckham, who taught her daughter that her number one job at school was to notice if there was someone alone in the playground, and then be friendly with that person. I feel like I am the girl alone on the playground, and Sammi is Victoria Beckham’s daughter, is what I’m saying.
  • Be Our Guest, Be Our Guest. We had our first houseguest this week, and it was my brother. If you know, you know. Because our old house was small and didn’t have a room for guests, we have actually never had houseguests before, so this was really fun. It was a super hot week – Tuesday was 39 degrees! – and sadly yesterday a huge fire broke out on the west side of the lake. We could see the flames from our house, which was frankly terrifying. My brother had left by that time, which was good because he would have been going through it; as of this morning I think the people who live out on that side – it’s not hugely populated, but there are people – are safe. There is some structural damage, but as of right now it’s not extensive.
The sole upside to smoky skies: sunsets.
  • Cross Canada Tour. Speaking of guests (I have looked at the word guest too many times and now it looks strange to me. Guest guest guest.) I will be guest-posting over at Elisabeth’s blog (HI ELISABETH)! Do you know Elisabeth? She and I have been friends since 2021, and I credit San (HI SAN) and her Secret Santa Mug Swap for introducing us. I think we were the only Canadians, so we got paired up and I couldn’t be happier to know her! Elisabeth is an organizational and thrifting QUEEN who should also be working for Tourism Nova Scotia, because her photos of her home province make everyone who sees them want to book a trip immediately. I am not sure when my guest post will be there – I have to write it first – but I haven’t guest-posted since probably 2010 SO THIS IS EXCITING.
  • I’ve Got The Key, I’ve Got The Secret. After twenty-three years of mail delivery to my door, I am getting used to having a community mailbox. The first few weeks I was here I had to borrow my mother-in-law’s mail key to access it, as in addition to sharing two acres, we share a mailbox. This should not have been a big deal, but it felt like a big deal; I would text her to see if I could borrow the key, which of course I could, then I would go to her house, and she’d have to get the key from its place in her car, and it simply felt like a lot to just get the mail. However, by the miracle that is Canadian Tire’s key cutting service, our house now has not one but two mail keys, and anyone can get the mail at any time. The timing for this was fortuitous as my dear, longtime friend Elise (HI ELISE) sent me an enormous care package with so many lovely things in it including chocolate goodies, and I was able to speed walk to the mailbox to get them before they melted. Did I mention it was 39 degrees? As a side note, Elise sent Cuban lunches, which I haven’t had in an AGE and I was so excited to get! Among SO MANY generous things, she also sent a bookmark, and my heart felt like the Grinch’s when it grew three sizes, seeing it.

We have been absolute social butterflies this week, and it looks like more of the same for the weekend! I love it! I was so worried about feeling lonely and isolated, moving here, but between new friends and old friends and long-distance friends sending love and even visiting (HI JANET), between family visits that have happened and family visits that will HOPEFULLY be happening NEXT MONTH (HI MOM) I am so happy and content. I hope you all have a wonderful, heart-filling weekend. xo

Same But Different

Very often, I think about all of us in the world, how we are all going about our lives in ways that are both the same and vastly different. Isn’t it incredible, in this big small world, that we are all bustling along, working away, caring for ourselves and our families and our pets, sneaking in bursts of joy in the day, and it’s all the same but also different?

I try not to be ethnocentric, or, more accurately, Nicolecentric, but sometimes I am surprised to discover that friends do boring, everyday things so very differently than I. It’s not like I think my methods are better or worse than anyone else’s, but they are different, I am discovering. I think sometimes there can be moral value judgement placed on how women do things – how often we do laundry, how often do we clean the bathroom, what are we making for dinner – but I’m not interested in any of that. One thing is as good as another, in my books. All the same, I wanted to talk about things I have noticed lately that we all do, but in different ways.

By The Book

My husband asked why I even have cookbooks because I never use them, or if I do use them, it is to wildly change the recipe. This is an exaggeration but only a little one; I don’t think there is any recipe I use regularly that I have not adapted or changed in some way. I’m like the irritating people who used to write in when I was working at YMC, who would say ridiculous things like: I made the chickpea dish you posted but I didn’t have chickpeas so I subbed ground beef, and I didn’t have lemon for the sauce so I used Worcestershire, and instead of parsley I used lettuce. It was terrible, I give zero stars to this recipe. Although, I’m not exactly like that, I like all the dishes I make, no notes. Even recipes for baked goods get the Nicole treatment – shave off some sugar, double the vanilla, let’s add chocolate chips! – and so all my cookbooks have my writing all over them, noting changes. I guess I think of cookbooks as aspirational jumping-off points, rather than, you know, something to use to make dinner.

Before we moved, I committed the cardinal sin of buying something new and extra to pack – two new cookbooks. I think I was having some kind of emotional crisis. My thinking was along the lines that we were going to be in a new house, in a new province, living a new life, with a half empty nest, and it was time to shake up the weekly meal plan. There seemed no need to have a pita pizza night when it would be just me and my husband, and there was no need to make extra pita pizzas for school lunches. So I bought two cookbooks and one of them sounded so promising, called Mandy’s Gourmet Salads. Mandy’s is, apparently, a famous salad and bowl place in Montreal, and I thought, what could be better? Well. This is the most ridiculous cookbook I have ever seen. Each recipe refers to at least one, but usually more, additional recipe on a different page, and then THAT recipe refers to another recipe. As an example, I wanted to make a peanut Thai noodle dish, and the recipe referred to another page for a spicy tofu recipe, and to another page for the chili lime dressing. When I got to the dressing page, the first item in the chili lime dressing recipe referred to ANOTHER recipe as the base for that dressing, and then THAT base recipe referred to another recipe for sesame syrup reduction, at which point I slammed the book shut and decided just to Free Bird it, deeply regretting wasting money on a cookbook when I was just going to make something up anyway. And this bird you cannot change.

Oh, I’m Dishwashing My Life Away

Someone recently asked me, when I mentioned washing dishes for the fifth time in a day, why I didn’t just get a dishwasher. I do indeed have a dishwasher and I do indeed use the dishwasher, but only for plates, silverware, and glassware, which is honestly only a small percentage of the items that need to be washed in the kitchen each day. I hand wash pots, pans, the food processor, the Vitamix, mixing bowls, and all the related cooking accoutrements. I suppose I could put some of those in the dishwasher, but they all take up a lot of room which would necessitate running the dishwasher several times a day, which seems wasteful.

When we were in planning stages of the house, the designer strongly recommended a large single sink to my husband, who relayed this information to me, was clearly not prepared for my outsized, passionate feelings about a double sink. He may have physically backed up slightly. I need a double sink to survive, is what I am saying, which is why Diane’s (HI DIANE) recent post about her dishwasher breaking, and her stopper-less single sink, gave me secondhand dishwashing anxiety. I have a very specific way of washing dishes: I fill the left sink with hot soapy water, and use the right sink to rinse out dishes BEFORE they go into the hot soapy water, because it harshes my kitchen mellow to have food particles or grease in the dishwater. I like clean dish water, what can I say. If I’m really in the zone I can rinse the washed-and-soapy dishes with hot running water, and allow that hot running water to also rinse the dirty dishes in the right sink, which feels like a virtuous water conservation project. If a pot is really gross, I will use a scrubber and the rinse water to clean it out BEFORE it goes into the hot soapy water. All the clean dishes get piled up on the dish rack and there they stay until they are dry, or dry enough, to put away. Growing up, my job was always to dry dishes, and there is not a household job I loathe more than that, no, not even scrubbing toilets; as god is my witness I shall never dry dishes again. Well, sometimes I do if I’m desperate, and when the kids clean the kitchen after dinner one of them will dry dishes, to prevent the inevitable tumbling down of the tower of dishes piled in the rack. They do not seem to have my dish-drying aversion.

This is controversial, but I never put a plate in the dishwasher without rinsing it first. I pile all the plates and cutlery into the dirty dishwater, after pots and pans are washed, and give each item a quick swipe with the scrub brush before loading the dishwasher. “So, you wash the dishes BEFORE they go into the dishwasher?” my mother asked me with her eyebrows in her hairline. No, I rinse them; if I washed them I would use the clean dishwater. My friend Dom (HI DOM) straight up told me that this methodology is a) insane and b) would, over time, result in a subpar performance by my dishwasher. Nevertheless, I am who I am and I shall not be deterred.

Girl, Wash Your Face

Speaking of washing things, if we were playing Never Have I Ever, I would say used a washcloth to wash my face. I use my hands, and so does my entire family; not to be insular, but I never really thought about it any other way until I read this by Suzanne (HI SUZANNE) and this by Engie (HI ENGIE) and realized that a large percentage of people are Team Washcloth. I have just never considered a washcloth as an option, and I probably never will, because the way I wash my face works just fine for me. A washcloth seems too rough for my skin and always has, although that doesn’t explain my early-teen usage of St Ives Apricot Scrub. I think that product could remove rust from a wheel well.

When I admitted that, while I own a couple of washcloths, they are never used for their intended purpose, I felt kind of exotic, fielding questions about washing my face with my hands, like I just landed here from Mars and humans were wondering how Martians perform their daily ablutions. Are you wondering how, exactly I wash my face? No? Are you thinking Nicole, this is the weirdest and most boring topic you have ever written about, and I just read a thousand words about how you wash dishes and hate cookbooks, so that is saying something? Well, we didn’t come this far just to get this far, people. Strap in, friends, we are going for a wild ride.

Here are the necessary items that guarantee success: a fresh hand towel for patting the old visage dry post-washing, Dove bar soap, Neutrogena cleanser.

Also necessary: tying back my hair and, when applicable, pushing up sleeves. No one wants to go to bed with wet jammie wrists, not that this is a concern with summer jammies.

First step: wet hands, work up a small lather with the Dove bar, and then splash the soapy water on the face, massaging gently to loosen the layers of makeup and sunscreen from the day, paying special attention to the eyes. I gently rub my eyelashes until I no longer feel mascara, but instead look like a crazed raccoon.

Next step: rinse hands and then work a dollop of Neutrogena cleanser into a lather, apply to face, massaging gently for a minute or so.

Last step: rinse, and then pat dry with the clean towel. I don’t like to put my face into a used towel, so I have many hand towels that I have under the sink for single use, like the princess that I am. This can also be used to wipe up any errant water sprays if need be.

Now I’m ready for my many serums and night creams!

Weekly Reading

Before I get into what I did read this week, I am going to tell you about a DNF. It is very rare for me not to finish a book, but the Menopause Reset made it onto the short list. How or why this ended up on my Kobo, I know not; maybe someone recommended it, maybe the Kobo algorithm recommended it, maybe I heard the author on a podcast and liked her, who can say. Well. The very first sentence is something like “Are you tired of not being able to lose weight?” and I thought, NO. Not only am I not interested, I am not even interested in reading even tangentially about weight loss. But I pushed through the first two chapters before abandoning ship. It was not well written, for one thing, although I have read worse-written books. The first two chapters talked about how great the author’s life was until menopause hit, and then there were SO MANY HOT FLASHES, YOU GUYS. Then she outlined how she took charge of her menopause, and mainly, it seems, that was accomplished through the keto diet, intermittent fasting, and detoxing. Again, none of these things are of interest to me but I may have still read it, had she not revealed that she did not believe in medication utilization for depression and anxiety. I myself do not suffer depression nor anxiety, but I have friends who do and medication literally saved their lives. Listen, I will grudgingly tolerate this attitude from Tom Cruise, because Maverick, but I will not read this kind of bullshit from another woman. DEE EN EFF.

A Living Remedy. This is a memoir about a woman losing both of her parents; I had also read her memoir about being adopted and the search for her birth parents, and I will say that this book was a much more compelling read. She discusses her father’s death from complications from untreated diabetes, and what stood out to me is the absolute disaster that it is for people without health insurance to become sick in the United States. I am no Smug Canadian here, because our health care system is far from perfect (ask me about finding a new doctor! Or wait lists!) but I think the absolute last thing a sick person should be doing is worrying about costs of treatment and if those costs are going to push a person into bankruptcy, which is exactly what happened in this book. Her working poor parents had no health insurance, and her dad became sicker and sicker, until he went to a doctor and discovered he lost 90% of his kidney function. His treatment, plus her mother’s bills from cancer treatment, meant that they had to declare bankruptcy. For some reason, they didn’t qualify for Medicare or disability insurance either. I think it is an absolute travesty. Recently I listened to the Hooked on Life podcast where one of their guests discussed his own journey with cancer and said that what is never talked about is the crippling depression that happens AFTER treatment; this man had lost his home, his job, everything. Anyway, this book is about more than just that, it also shows a beautiful and loving relationship between the author and her mother. Her mother died of cancer during the early part of the pandemic; the author could not be with her mother when she passed, and it made me so sad to remember that very terrible time. So many deaths that would have been so lonely. This book is definitely worth a read but, clearly, heavy reading material. 

If you, like me, are also fascinated by the myriad ways we experience the boring and mundane minutia of life, feel free to share! Are you Team Washcloth or Team Hands? Do you also have weird and absolutely rigid ways of doing the dishes? Do you hate drying them? How do you feel about recipes? Tell me everything. xo

Acclimatizing

Are You Feeling Hot! Hot! Hot!

Since I got here, it has been one beautiful day after another; summer here is absolutely gorgeous. If I had even one day like this in Calgary – warm and sunny, windless and without storms – I would be frantically spending every possible second outside, carpe diem, not wanting to waste a beautiful day. Weather there is always so volatile – one of my girlfriends texted me last week to say it was 13 degrees and pouring rain – so I’m ever so grateful to be living in a place where I can predict what the day will bring. Summer weather in the summer, what a novel concept!

I was a bit concerned, moving here, how Rex would do in the heat. He’s definitely a cold-weather dog, and I was worried that the temperatures would be too hot for him, but so far it has not been a problem. I walk him at 8:00 at the latest, and our walking route is a beautiful trail that is almost entirely shaded. It winds along a creek, which he enjoys drinking from and also is the reason his white paws are completely grubby all the time now. Attached to this path is an offleash park, which is also shaded and has water taps, bowls, and kiddie pools. It also had, one day, Rex’s doppelgänger.

As an aside, one of the first days I was at the offleash a very attractive young man was chatting with me and told me not to worry about the water in the bowls, he had just filled them, adding, ominously, You know, I don’t trust the old water, because of that woman. Wait, what woman? I told him I just moved here and he explained that there was a woman who would came to dog parks, with no dog, and poisoned the water in the bowls. Several dogs got sick and one actually DIED. I listened to this story with wide, horrified eyes, and was reminded of my days at the playground, how the young mothers would warily eye men without children, sitting on the benches. In any case, now that Rex has discovered the giant water bowl that is in the creek, he is completely uninterested in the water at the offleash.

I do love our morning walk route, but I have had to adjust to driving to get to the trail, rather than just strolling out the door, as I was used to doing. The first morning I was here I decided I WOULD walk to the trail; it was only about two kilometres, and I had used it as a running route before, so I was sure it would be just fine. Well. I had grossly misjudged how stressful it would be to walk down a busy road with no sidewalks, only a bike lane, with an enormous and excited dog bounding around, while cars zipped past. It took all my strength to keep the leash short and Rex on the inside, which backfired completely when he excitedly discovered not only a dead raccoon, but several squashed birds, at which point my soul briefly left my body. Suddenly, it didn’t seem like driving five minutes was such a hardship to be avoided.

International Costco Woman of Mystery

I have been slowly getting used to the grocery stores here. Sure, Superstore is Superstore, and Costco is Costco, but there are differences from what I’m used to. I think the biggest difference is that because Kelowna is just over a tenth of the size of Calgary, there is only one of each of those stores, and hence they are very busy. I made the mistake of going to Costco on a day that was a bit cooler and overcast – but still, temperature-wise, would have been considered a hot day in Calgary – and it was INSANE. It reminded me of the Costco in Maui, and just writing that makes me feel like I am a fancy world-Costco-traveller. Nicole: The International Costco Woman of Mystery could be the name of my memoir. Anyway, the layout was the same as the one in Maui and opposite of that in Calgary, which made it tricky to find everything on my list, and also it was so busy as to be almost impossible to maneuver through the aisles. It was literal bumper-to-bumper cart traffic. Perhaps it will be easier when tourist season is over.

The biggest difference for me, grocery-wise, is Superstore. It’s not just the layout, it’s the actual products that are available. Calgary in general and the part of the city in which I lived in particular is much more multicultural than here, and so the international foods aisle was always a cornucopia of fun and interesting items. Here, this is not the case. A quarter of the international aisle is filled with British products, like spotted dick, which I am not in the market for, culinary or otherwise, and the selection of Asian, Indian, and African items is pretty limited. I’m finding it hard to find noodles I like, is what I’m saying.

Hi Neighbourino

Probably the largest adjustment I have had to make has to do with my next-door neighbour. Before I get into that, a little context: my husband grew up on his family-owned vineyard, and about twenty years ago his family sold it and the attached winery, keeping two acres of it. The house in which we are living was originally his grandparents’; we added a second floor to it and took the existing house down to the studs, renovating it completely. It is such an incredibly fortunate thing to be able to live in a beautiful new house on a vineyard, overlooking the lake and the city. Every morning I wake up and look out the windows and feel so very lucky.

There is one thing that I feel you should know, and I’m mentioning it in a very casual, value-neutral way, and that is that there is another house on this two acre property, and that house belongs to my mother-in-law. While you absorb that information, I will hasten to assure you that my mother-in-law and I have a good relationship, albeit one that has been cultivated long-distance over the past twenty-five years. She is not one of those women who think that No One Is Good Enough For Her Precious Son; in fact, she thinks everything I do and every decision I make is Just Wonderful, Dear, which is lovely and, I think, rare. She is not a person who insists on having every meal together; in fact, I can’t even remember the last time we had a dinner together, it might have been Thanksgiving 2020.

But still, living next door is a lot different from twice-or-thrice annual visits, and so this is an adjustment to be sure, mostly a mental one. My main concern is maintaining boundaries and protecting personal privacy, for both of us, and mostly it’s been fine. We had an open and honest conversation about this prior to the move, which was INCREDIBLY difficult for me, because I don’t know how you grew up in the 80s and 90s, but open and honest conversation was not part of the story for me. In any case, there have been a few gentle bumps, but mostly it’s been fairly smooth sailing.

Bye Bye Birdie

In eighteen days, my older son is moving on campus for his first year at university. He’s so excited, and I’m so excited for him, and also, landslide. The university is close to us, so this feels like a very soft landing, but it’s still going to be a big change. In the meantime, I’m really cherishing having four faces at the dinner table. When he was working shift work this past year, I found myself thinking that the nights he was home for dinner was a real treat; this past month I feel spoiled having both the boys here all the time. What I am going to say is nothing new or original or earth-shattering, but I just love my boys so much; I am so proud of them both and I think they are incredible people, and I can hardly believe my luck that the universe gave them to me. It’s been so wonderful having them both here this summer, and of course it’s going to change very soon, and, like everything else, I will adjust to the changes. All you who have been through this know what it is.

I’m going to miss my son’s bartending skills; check out this mango margarita!

Weekly Reading

First of all, thank you all for your very kind comments of understanding and stories of hope, with regards to Bookmarkgate. So far they have not been recovered, but there are some boxes with garage items and gardening implements that I have not yet gone through, and although I’m not very hopeful, I’m not COMPLETELY hopeless. It’s more like 90% hopeless, as opposed to 100% before your lovely comments. We hosted our first dinner party this weekend and my sweet friend Sammi (HI SAMMI) brought me bookmarks as a housewarming, to “tide me over until the others were found.” I have such lovely friends!

Prep. When I was a kid I was obsessed with the idea of boarding school. It just seemed so fun and cool. Is it just me or does everyone think this? Anyway, this book is a very realistic portrait of a girl from Indiana who goes to a New England boarding school on scholarship; it shows her evolution from freshman to senior, and I really liked it. It showed an insular and privileged world, with all the angst of a teen in the 90s. I thought it was such a true picture of what it was to be a teen at that time, albeit in a very different life than the one I had.

Here we are at the end of a long weekend, and I hope yours was great. Have a lovely week, everyone! xo

The Years Are Short

What an incredible week it’s been! Although I don’t believe Mondays to be a portent of the week to come, last Monday night it poured rain, which settled the smoke in the air. We woke up to blue skies and sunshine, and the ability to take a full breath outside without feeling like this might be the first step to lung disease. I thought this was a sign of a great week, and it was.

Blue skies!

I was especially happy – not just because the smoke was giving me aching muscles and general fatigue, which disappeared immediately after the rain – because we had such a busy and exciting week ahead. My younger son had his graduation ceremony, and all the fun hoopla that comes with it. The ceremony was on Friday, but the kids had to return their gowns immediately afterward, so Thursday after school I photographed my son and his group of friends. There is a group of about ten of them that have been really tight for years – some since kindergarten – so to see them all in their caps and gowns was really wonderful.

It was so much fun; they were all such good sports for their photo shoots, humouring me with silly supermodel poses and changing locations around the school, blowing kisses and posing in a conga line on my cue. “Work it, work it!” I’d say, and then “Frolic through the trees!”

I SAID FROLIC!

I had a belated birthday lunch with my dear friend Tara (HI TARA) on Saturday; both our second children graduated this week and we were discussing the ceremonies. Both our ceremonies had a lot of graduates – there were 691 in my son’s class, and a similar number in her daughter’s – and we both had a feeling of deep gratitude that we could be there and experience it. I had the same feeling last year, when my older son had the first grad ceremony held since 2019.

If there is one gift that the Covid pandemic has given me, it’s extreme gratitude for the ability to celebrate occasions. After the ceremony, one of the moms had arranged a luncheon at a golf club for the boys in their group – the Brentwood Boys, as they are known – plus all the family members and grandparents. She had asked us all to send in photos of the boys throughout the years and then created a slideshow, which was really wonderful and special. There were photos from elementary school, sleepovers, Halloweens, and birthday parties, and, of course, there were a lot from the pandemic. They finished junior high in June of 2020, and we had photographed them all outside, all standing six feet apart, and it was a little sad to see those photos, thinking of the fun things they missed that year. There were so many of those pandemic photos: birthday parties where they had masks on, standing outside, bundled up for the elements, a few of them in my own backyard, with chairs six feet apart and a big bottle of hand sanitizer in the foreground, school lunches every day at a friend’s nearby backyard and garage, even when it was well below freezing, because they weren’t allowed to eat inside the school. These kids have been through a lot and all I could feel was happiness that we were all there together, sharing a meal and laughing and hugging. How incredible to have such friendships over the years. How incredible to be a part of this group.

We moved into this neighbourhood twenty-three years ago, and one of the biggest selling points was that there were schools of all levels within walking distance of home. We had the choice to bus the kids to other, specialty schools, but we really wanted the kids to be able to walk to school and make friends in the neighbourhood. I am so glad we made that decision all those years ago.

Back when the boys were very small, I would walk them to the elementary school playground after naptime and before the school let out for the day. It was a good way to kill some time before dinner and allow the kids to have some fresh air. I was so lonely back then. Being home with two very small children can be a very lonely experience; it was always hard to coordinate playdates with other moms of more than one child, playgroups were only once or twice a week, and there are just so many long hours in the day. My husband was gone twelve hours in the day, generally the twelve hours that the boys were awake, so I was just on duty all the time. So I would take the double stroller to the playground, and I would see two moms who were always there with their kindergarten age children, waiting for the older ones to finish for the day. I desperately wanted to be friends with them, and I did try to talk to them, but the chasm between a mom of a one-and-two-year old and a mom of a five-and-seven-year old is vast and wide, and also, if you have ever tried to strike up a conversation while caring for two toddlers, you know of which I speak. Conversational continuity is nearly impossible, and so I continued being lonely, looking at those women longingly.

This week’s graduate, at the playground 16 years ago.

Only a few years later, I did become friends with them when my own children were at that school, and we were all on the same volunteer committees together. I happily was absorbed into their large circle, and we have been friends all these years, the self-named Brentwood Babes. Saturday night, some of the Babes went to dinner theatre, which I had never done before. My son’s best friend – they have been friends since age 3 – works there, and we had a great time watching the rendition of The Wedding Singer, which involved really great music and lots of laughs.

It’s amazing, really. I’m the baby of the group and it’s pretty incredible to have a group of friends who are a few steps ahead in life, who have supported each other through so many life changes and hardships, and who have shared in each other’s joys. This neighbourhood is a bit like a small town, with its shops and parks and kind of knowing each other’s business, with its Food Library and Little Free Libraries and the actual public library, with its schools and playgrounds and grocery stores. For me, this neighbourhood is the best thing about living in Calgary, and I was really feeling it this week.

Thanks to Covid, I will never take for granted these long-standing friendships and the ability to spend time together; I would never say the pandemic is a good thing, because it was terrible, but no mud, no lotus, as they say.

Weekly Reading

Fleishmann Is In Trouble. There are at least two sides to every story, but sometimes, when you are in the thick of a story, it’s hard to see the other side. This book, which on a surface level, deals with a divorce and custody of children, was brilliantly written in three parts. The first part focuses entirely on the husband and all the things that he is going through, and I found myself incredibly sympathetic to his plight. But then, the narrator – who is a third party – starts to show cracks and glimmers of insight into the wife’s life and motivations. It’s complex and very, very gripping. More than just a book about a breakup, it’s a scathing treatise on marriage, divorce, wealth, class, and, most of all, what it means to be a woman moving through this world. Women, as we all know, can never really win or have it all, particularly mothers. There is always something we are giving up or giving in to, there is always some societal pressure on us to act a certain way or be a certain way, and if we give in to that pressure, it’s going to come at us from another angle. This book was brilliant and is definitely one of my favourites so far this year. Someone recommended this to me; my initial thought was Engie (HI ENGIE), but she read it in 2020, and it was recently recommended. Was it Birchy, or maybe Suzanne? (HI BIRCHY HI SUZANNE). If it was you, let me know!

Don’t Call Me Home. There is an Alice Munro story called Jakarta, which features a running joke between two women that starts with “I’m no prude, but…” and I kept thinking of this the whole time I was reading this memoir about the daughter of an Andy Warhol muse and an artist. I’m no prude, but…this book was shocking and kind of horrifying in every sense of the word. I don’t even know where to start but let’s just say the first ten years of this woman’s childhood were spent nomadically, until her mother became pregnant with her sister – actress Gaby Hoffman – at which point they lived at the famed Chelsea Hotel in NYC. Every single detail about this memoir had my eyes opening wide and my eyebrows finding refuge in my hairline. Obviously her mother was mentally ill and it’s pretty sad that Warhol made tons of money without disseminating any to the women who worked for him, but also, my god. This book is bananas. It’s also weirdly written and there are just so many people in it that I found myself thinking “wait, who’s Ron? Who’s Kathy? Is Mike their son or…wait, is that her own COUSIN she’s considering having sex with? It is? Oh my god.” I mean, your mileage may vary but I found this so disturbing and not written well enough to warrant me overlooking the material.

It’s gearing up to be a pretty busy week around here, once again, but not quite as exciting or social as last week. I hope you all have a beautiful week with lots of blue skies and sunshine. xo