Category Archives: Beauty and body

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Operation Fancy Lady Edition

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About a month ago, I was able to watch my son perform at his school in a student-run short production. This production was the first on-stage production since before the pandemic, so I was pretty excited. As I waited for fifteen minutes after the production for my son to finish the stage cleanup, I chatted with others who were waiting for the same reason. I talked to my son afterward: I met L’s parents and R’s mom, oh, and I met S’s dad and stepmom and introduced them to G’s mom…He looked at me curiously. “How did you meet all those people? Did you just go up to them and ask them if they had a kid in the play?” Yes! That’s exactly what I did.

A few years back I heard the term Extroverted Introvert, and I felt seen. I am technically an introvert; I need my alone time to recharge, but I love being around other people, and I love meeting new people. If you are having a party, and you need Mixer People, give me a call. There’s nothing I love more at a party than circulating through the room and talking to everyone: I love new people and I love seeing familiar faces, and I would probably talk to a chair if it had a picture of a smiley face on it. This is why I was very excited to join my husband for a night in Banff at a conference his company was hosting; there was a reception, and a dinner, and I was ALL IN. This was my first Real Social Event since before the pandemic; I have really missed having these kinds of events to meet people.

I discovered, after meeting other spouses, that most of them were there for both nights of the conference, whereas I only drove out for one, and so I felt a little regretful. But no matter! It was held at the Banff Springs, which is a very special place. This was my THIRD time to the Springs in the past six months, so I think that makes me a Very Fancy Lady.

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Operation Fancy Lady Edition

Three Outfits

I wanted to make sure I was comfortable for the 75 minute drive to the Springs; Banff can be very unpredictable in terms of weather so I needed layers, and I wanted those layers to look cute since I assumed I would meet people upon arrival.

I want to talk about these pants. These pants are officially a Favourite Thing, and I have them in a few colours. They are from lululemon and they are structured, with a button and zipper, but they feel like yoga pants. They are literally the most comfortable pants I own, and I love them. I added cute Skecher flats, a plain tee, a super-long swoopy sweater, and a scarf. It was a perfect driving outfit, but also perfect for wandering around the hotel, meeting my husband’s colleagues and customers, and having a glass of wine at the bar, where I ended up talking to many people who were not involved in my husband’s conference, but who were from as far away as Ohio, Georgia, and Virginia. When I meet people like that I feel like I need to be an Ambassador For Canada, and I end up saying things like Welcome To Our Beautiful Country, and giving tourism advice.

After being a self-appointed Canadian Ambassador, I went to get dressed for the fancy dinner. I bought this dress for a Christmas party in 2018, and have worn it maybe once since. It is from the now-defunct Le Chateau, and is a stretchy sheath dress underneath a big drapey part, which makes it comfortable AND flattering. The heels are decidedly NOT my comfy Skechers, and by the end of the night my feet were very sore, but needs must sometimes.

The next morning my husband went golfing with customers, and I decided to go for a walk to Bow Falls and downtown Banff before I had to check out. I put my great-for-walking Skechers on my very sore feet and layered up.

The weather was pretty unsettled, with really low-lying cloud and a few sprinkles of rain, so I was happy to have packed this jacket, also from lululemon. It’s lined and waterproof, and the hood zips up really nicely in case of gusty wind.

Here is a photo of Bow Falls, which is crazier than normal because of all the rain that we have had of late, as well as the usual seasonal snowmelt:

I guess in terms of Favourite Things, being in the mountains is one of them. This is maybe the very best thing about living in Calgary, the proximity to the Rockies.

Sheertex

Unless it’s the middle of summer, or I am on a hot and sunny vacation, I do not like being bare-legged while wearing dresses. There are three reasons for this: a) I get cold, b) I have Reynaud’s Syndrome which means my legs are generally an unattractive shade of purplish-blue, and c) I have very unsightly varicose veins. Longtime readers may recall I had my varicose veins stripped back in 2011, and that painful procedure was supposed to be the end of it, but alas, I have since developed new ones and my doctor says there is nothing to be done, as I am obviously prone to it and if they strip any more veins, I am going to have Massive Circulation Issues.

Our local Pharmasave advertised that they were carrying Sheertex hosiery; I have had a few occasions in the past month where I would be wearing a dress and wanted to wear pantyhose, and so I looked into Sheertex. I will tell you now, I almost fainted when I saw the price tag. However, in the long run I think it will pay off, as these are supposed to be indestructible.

How many pairs of pantyhose have I thrown out in my lifetime after only one wear, sometimes even less than that, because I put a fingernail through them while putting them on, or snagged them on a bracelet, or got a run from bumping into a table? I shudder to think of the money down the drain. Anyway, the cost of these is insane, but supposedly they should last me a very long time. So far I’ve worn them four times, and they still look perfect, and that’s AFTER I took off my shoes and walked around in my stocking feet at the Banff Springs, after having several drinks and standing around in heels for hours.

Cover Girl Outlast

I have to thank Gigi (HI GIGI) for the recommendation of Cover Girl Outlast lipstick. Gigi said that she used it and it lasted all day, even with mask wearing and eating. I was skeptical, so I took photos of myself for a day wearing it, applying it only in the morning and not reapplying during the day.

8:00 am. In the Superstore parking lot with freshly applied Outlast.

12:30 pm. After a morning of grocery shopping and mask wearing, drinking several glasses of water and a smoothie, eating a fruit salad, and brushing my teeth, the lipstick still looks perfect without a reapplication!

3:00 pm. This is after taking the boys to their optometry appointment. Lip colour is still there – after masking too – but it’s starting to fade.

7:00 pm. This is after dinner, water, and flossing and brushing my teeth. Eleven hours of wear, no reapplication; I am not going to throw out all my other lipsticks but I feel like I could. Other lipsticks, you can JUST GO HOME. This stuff is amazing, thanks Gigi for the recommendation!

Favourite Link of the Month: The Sugar Thief

This has nothing to do with being a Fancy Lady, but I read The Sugar Thief by Laura Bray (HI LAURA) and have thought about it intermittently ever since. It’s just an absolute delight. Laura is not a new blogger, but she is new to me, and her writing is wonderful. Go check it out!

Happy Pride Month! Those are my Favourite Things this month: what are yours? Tell me everything. xo

A Medical Mystery

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What’s the opposite of a hypochondriac? Whatever it is, I think I am one.

I had my annual physical this week, and my doctor has started giving me the lab requisition prior to my appointments, so we can discuss the results together. I have never had any issue with my lab work with one exception: I have a weirdly low white blood cell count, which is something that sounds pretty alarming. If you look up “low white blood cell count” the first dozen or so results will be cancer in various forms, followed by autoimmune things like lupus and AIDS. Another possible reason for low white blood cells is low Vitamin B12 levels, but my Vitamin B12 levels are absurdly high, along with my iron levels, which is fairly unusual considering my plant-based diet. In any case, I’ve had low white blood cells for many years, and I’m not dead yet, or incapacitated in any way, so I guess that’s just the way it is for me. My doctor agrees, saying some people just have lower than normal levels; it’s one of those weird unexplained things, and I’m fine with being weird and unexplained.

Anyway, other than that small and strange issue, my lab work is always just fine, so I was very surprised to get a phone call from the doctor’s office a few weeks ago. I was in Superstore, because where else would I be if not grocery shopping, and the nurse informed me that my lab results were back and I have a bladder infection, and so she would call in an antibiotic prescription to the pharmacist near me. Imagine, if you will, feeling perfectly normal and healthy, standing beside the red peppers with a mesh produce bag in one hand, talking through a mask to a nurse who is telling you that you have a bladder infection, while other shoppers dart around you and your giant cart, trying to grab a pepper, with soft mellow music playing in the background. “A bladder infection?” I said, “I don’t think I have one.” She said that I sure did, and listed off the symptoms of such an infection, familiar to all of us, but not applicable to me at that moment.

While still shopping, my husband texted me to say that the pharmacy had called, and I had a prescription ready? The pharmacist was confused since I haven’t had a prescription in a decade or so, and my husband was confused because he “didn’t know I was sick,” and I was confused by the whole thing. By that time I had only made it to the bakery section, and they didn’t have the pitas I like. On my way home I picked up the prescription and then I put it in the cupboard and forgot about it.

I figured that if I developed symptoms, I would certainly take the antibiotics; we were going into the long weekend and what is worse than getting a bladder infection or UTI and having to wait to see the doctor, but if I’m being honest, I thought the lab maybe made a mistake. I mean, wouldn’t I KNOW if I had a bladder infection? If you know, you know, I thought.

Fast-forward to my doctor’s appointment and after all the usual things, he brought up my “recent bladder infection” and asked if the antibiotics cleared it up, at which point I told him that I never took the antibiotics because I didn’t think I had an infection. This led to a careful examination of my results, an assurance that my name and health care number was right there, and a gentle admonition that Some People Can Have Infections With No Symptoms.

Me: But wouldn’t I KNOW?

Doctor: Usually, but not always.

Me: Can it clear up on its own? I feel fine.

Doctor: On some occasions your immune system might fight it off for a while, but untreated infections can go into the bloodstream and cause sepsis.

Me: I am pretty sure I would know if I had sepsis.

Doctor: Well, yes. You’d be delirious and probably hospitalized. That’s why we don’t let it get to that point. That’s why I prescribed the antibiotics.

Huh. Solid point. He went on to say that perhaps my symptoms present differently, and was I feeling a bit more tired lately? That could be it.

Come to think of it, I was feeling a bit more tired than usual, but I chalked it up to nightly hot flashes, my son’s graduation, the frenzy of gardening that comes when Calgary gets decent weather, finishing up my yoga classes until September, and an existential crisis about it being June and my sons growing up. But I guess there could be a medical component in there.

This whole thing is WILD to me. I mean, what are the chances that I just happen to have an infection right when I go for lab work? What if this had happened a few months ago? If my only symptom is tiredness, I would never seek medical attention, never. Theoretically, could I be a little bit tired and then go into sepsis? God, I hope not. This is just like when Covid hit our house, and the first person who tested positive was completely asymptomatic the whole way through, and my only symptom was being tired. Should I be suspicious every time I feel a little tired? I’m going through perimenopause here, what is Normal Tired and what is Halfway To Sepsis Tired? What is It’s Been A Long Week And I Need More Sleep Tired and what is Pack Your Bag For The Hospital Tired?

Well. I went home and started the antibiotics, to my husband’s horror – “You mean you DIDN’T take them already? You got those three weeks ago! Why wouldn’t you take what the doctor told you to take?” – and I feel…fine. Less tired? Who can say? If I listen to my body, it’s going to say I’m fine when in reality, who knows? Hopefully by the time you read this I will not have dropped dead from some mysterious ailment with no symptoms.

Is that bad luck to write? I hope not. I feel a little superstitious, but not enough to delete. I’m fine! I’m sure I’m fine.

Weekly Reading

This Is The Story of a Happy Marriage. About halfway through this book of essays is a 40-page essay entitled The Wall, which is about the author’s experience going to the LA Police Academy as research. I felt sure I had read the essay before – most in the book had been previously published – but on examination I didn’t think I read a 40-page essay in the Washington Post in 2007, when my kids were 2 and 3. The next essay – and please keep in mind, people, that by this time I was well over halfway through the book – seemed very familiar too. I looked at my spreadsheet where I record all my books read and discovered that I had already read this, in 2018. Oops. Some of the essays were very much worth a reread, some were not.

Atlas of the Heart. There was so much food for thought in this intelligent, yet easy to read book about connections and emotions. Some chapters really resonated with me. The section on “Bittersweet” summed up exactly how I’m feeling these days and the existential crisis I am having.

“Sadness about letting go of something, mixed with happiness and/ or gratitude about what’s been experienced and/ or what’s next.”

No Cure For Being Human. We all know that life is short and miraculous, and technically we all know we could be living our last day today, but what if you REALLY knew today could be your last day? What if you were living with an incurable and terminal disease and you’d already outlasted expectations? How would you live your life? This is a truly beautiful book about finitude and living within our limitations as people. I read her first book, but in my opinion this one is much better and more uplifting.

And now, my dear friends, I shall pass the microphone on to you. Where do you land on the hypochondriac scale? Have you ever had a medical issue without knowing you had a medical issue? Are you having an existential crisis of any kind? Have you ever read more than half a book before realizing you had already read it? Tell me everything. xo

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Daily Glow-Up Edition

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You’re already beautiful; the makeup is just for fun. This is what my friend Dan Thompson used to say, and it’s so true. Makeup, to me, is fun, but I have a small confession to make: I actually don’t feel like ME without makeup on.

It’s not that I don’t believe that I’m beautiful without it, and it’s not that I hate the way I look, barefaced. It’s not even that I prefer the way I look with makeup on; it is that I honestly do not feel like myself without it. I don’t feel like my best self without it, either.

There’s probably a lot that could be said or conclusions that could be drawn about me, given that statement, but it is absolutely true. I put on makeup every single day, every SINGLE DAY, regardless of my activity or who I see or don’t see, because the truth is that wearing makeup is for me and for my own mental benefit. Illness is the only thing that keeps me from putting on makeup, and even then, I have to basically have one foot in the grave to not at least brush on a coat of mascara and a dusting of powder.

I have been writing about my Favourite Things for almost ten years now – the first Favourite Things was written in July 2012! – and the point of it has never been to tell anyone else what they should be doing or using. Nicole’s Favourite Things are NICOLE’S Favourite Things, things I love and things that work for me, and if they work for you or you want to try and enjoy them, then that is a bonus.

I know what it feels like to have someone disparage something you love, or cast aspersions on you for enjoying something, and I never want to make anyone feel that way. I never want anyone to feel that they should be doing something or that they have to do something or shame about what they do or like. If you’re a person who prefers to go au naturel, for whatever reason, I celebrate and support you! After all, we ARE all beautiful, and makeup is a fun frivolity that I do not want to live without. I COULD live without it, of course, but I do not want to.

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Daily Glow-Up Edition

First, let me show you what we are working with.

This is me at 4:10 am on a Thursday morning; my face has been washed and my hair has been brushed, but I am pre-yoga, pre-workout, PRE-COFFEE, all of which are things that de-puff my puffy morning face. I have no makeup on, nor any moisturizer. This is just me.

Serums and Primer

I have spoken before about my love for The Ordinary serums – I like the caffeine 5% for under my eyes, and the argireline solution for my forehead lines. Both are under $10 each and they last about four months. I mean, you cannot go wrong. I also use Smashbox Smooth and Blur primer, although I don’t think it smooths or blurs, but it does help my makeup last all day. In the summer and on warm spring days I put on Neutrogena sunscreen – it goes on before the primer, but after the serums.

This is me post-shower, post-yoga-and-workout, post-coffee, post-serum-and-primer.

BB and CC Cream

If I am not wearing actual sunscreen, I like IT Your Skin But Better CC Cream because it contains SPF. You can sustain sun damage any time of year, people, yes, even in Calgary, even in the winter. I am outside a minimum of an hour a day, regardless of weather, and much more than that in actual nice weather, so SPF is a must. If I am wearing the afore-mentioned Neutrogena sunscreen, then I use Garnier BB Cream, which I like but doesn’t have anything in the way of SPF.

Small note, if you decide to try IT CC Cream: it is quite heavy. Use about half of what you think you might need, otherwise you may end up with a Kabuki-like face. I also like a dusting of pressed powder; Revlon Photoready Blurring Powder is my favourite. Does it blur? It does not. But it helps “set” my makeup for the day.

The Eyes Have It

Longtime readers will recall that I have been a fan of Maybelline Falsies Lash Lift for many, many years. Honestly, I have tried many more expensive brands of mascara and I always come back to Maybelline, which is available for about eight dollars at the drugstore.

There’s nothing like a mask and car lighting to showcase the eyes:

In addition to the most ridiculously-named-but-so-good mascara (FALSIES, WHAT), I use an Annabelle eyeliner and brow pencil. Here’s the thing: never in my life did I think I would need a brow pencil. I was born with what can be kindly described as Luxurious Eyebrows, but were, in my teen years, something more akin to a cross between Martin Scorsese and Bert from Sesame Street.

However, due to greying and, apparently, balding eyebrows, I have had to fill in – gently, don’t want to channel Uncle Leo – my brows for the past year or so.

I also add just a tiny bit of blush to the apples of my cheeks.

Smooch

Lip colour is just so transformative. I like to have lots of options; I still wear a mask to most places, but if I’m outside walking or meeting a friend, I always put on some lip colour. Even just around the house, I like to at least put on tinted lip balm. Calgary is a very dry climate and I find lips can get chapped or cracked very easily, and O’Keefe’s is great for nighttime treatment or on the rare occasion that I want an untinted lip balm.

My favourite Cover Girl Semi-Matte lipstick in the Trending shade has been discontinued! Don’t you hate that? I guess it’s time to find a new favourite among the million other lipsticks around.

So there we have it; my daily glow-up routine. I enjoy Putting On My Face, as the senior set says, and these are all my current favourite products. I hope you enjoyed my transformation! If you have favourite makeup products, let me know what they are – I love hearing about such things! xo

Maybe She’s Born With It, Maybe It’s Maybelline; 111 Weeks In

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Very frequently, of late, I have looked into the mirror and noticed what I thought was mascara smudged under my eyes. Each and every time, I try to remove the smudged mascara only to realize that it is not smudged mascara at all: it is just my skin, and that is how it looks now. Since this happens almost daily, you would think that I wouldn’t be surprised by this, but you would be wrong. I am surprised, every time.

My undereye circles are a bit more pronounced this week; I have been just a little short on sleep for several nights in a row. It turns out that those fifteen or twenty minutes each night start to add up, and I’ve been feeling just a little bit tired.

There was a parent meeting for my son’s club wrestling, and it was in person. I was so startled by this turn of events, I hardly knew what to do. I was waiting for information on a zoom link, and when the information came that the meeting would be in person, at the university, you would think that someone would have told me that I was slated to perform an interpretive dance in front of an audience of 1000. What do I do, where do I go, what do I wear, how is this going to work? It was fine, of course, although it has been over two years since I have been in a room with thirty other people. It has also been almost 25 years since I was at that part of the university, and it was very fun to walk by the fitness centre and the racquet centre, places I used to spend considerable amounts of time at, and that have – not surprisingly – changed a great deal.

There are lots of changes afoot. The people that bought the house next door, and are renovating it completely, are so nice and I am so looking forward to having them as my neighbours, not just because I think they will be a lovely addition to our neighbourhood, but also because that will mean that their renovations will be complete.

I see the gentleman a few times a week, on the occasions that I happen to be outside when he’s checking on the progress of the renovation. We always have a quick chat and he always says, in the most amiable way, “I hope the noise isn’t bothering you too much!” to which I respond, perkily, “No, no, it doesn’t bother me at all!” And that’s true! Mostly.

I am a person who can easily absorb loud noises and just go on with life; it’s almost like the sounds of hammering and beeping and what have you becomes white noise to me, with the exception of the afternoon that they jackhammered out the front steps and walkway. When that happened, my whole house shook intermittently for two hours, and my nerves, people. I kept repeating my favourite coping line, stolen from Allison (HI ALLISON) a decade ago: there will be a time after this. There will be a time after the jackhammering.

But mostly, it’s been just fine. I don’t have any babies or small children for whom the noise might disturb their sleep schedules, and the dog is almost completely deaf, so he is unbothered. The only problem came last weekend, when it appeared that the workers were on some kind of deadline, perhaps to coordinate trades for the week ahead. For five days straight they worked until 10pm.

For normal people, I am sure that wouldn’t be an issue, and if you were standing on the street, you probably wouldn’t have noticed, but the side of the house they were working on was the one nearest my bedroom, and 10pm is over an hour past my bedtime. I lay awake, hearing the hammering of…pipes? I don’t really know what they were doing. There will be a time after this. This is temporary. It took me a long while after they finished work to fall asleep, and I repeated my sleep mantra, which is My body is resting, even if I don’t sleep I am still resting my body. I generally find that soothing enough to fall asleep without becoming stressed out and anxious that I’m not sleeping enough.

The construction is temporary, the neighbours are not, right? I like all our neighbours; I cannot stress enough how important it is to me that the neighbours and I get along. There is absolutely nothing to be gained by a feud between neighbours; I will do anything to keep the peace, including never saying anything about workmen being noisy right up until the bylaw deadline. After all, over the past 22 years our neighbours have been wonderful, and that includes the times when we have had swarms of children in our yard, jumping on the trampoline and screaming, and also my son’s daily drum practice. I feel grateful to have had such fantastic people of all ages and personalities living nearby, and I just know our new neighbours are going to be lovely.

And the more work they do on the house, late in the day, the faster the renovation will be done. Right? Right. In any case, I got a little more sleep last night, downgrading my undereye circles from Raccoon to Lightly Smudged Mascara.

Pandemic Reading

The Ex-Boyfriend Yard Sale. When a broke actress finds herself in major credit card debt, she tries to think of ways to raise money: what if she sold the items given to her by ex-boyfriends? The idea of valuing such items turned into a one-woman stage show, and then, obviously, this book. She enlisted the help of mathematicians and economic theorists to create a formula for valuing gifts from exes, and the value the exes brought to her life. The economic theory and math was fun to read, and for me, it made this book a worthwhile read. However.

Listen, we have all had our share of bad relationships and made our share of bad decisions. What would it be to read a memoir in which no bad choices were made and everything was just fine. AND YET. I found myself constantly frustrated with and disappointed in the author. MAKE BETTER CHOICES, MY GOD. If a man has sex with you for three years, and yet refuses to be called your boyfriend, that is not just a red flag, it is an entire skyscraper ensconced in red velvet. If a man tells you he doesn’t want to be in a relationship with you, don’t keep trying to be in a relationship. Even if he does “give you six orgasms” or an orgasm that “lasts three minutes” every time you have sex (which, what?). There is a part where she tells him everything she wants in their relationship, and people, this is THREE PAGES LONG and lists everything from “spending every holiday together, just the two of us” to “never letting our sexual desire fade” (understandable, given the six-orgasms-per-sexual-encounter), to “buying a sectional for snuggling.” After this three page monologue, the guy says that he doesn’t want any of those things, and he cannot give her any of those things, AND YET SHE PERSISTS IN TRYING TO HAVE A RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM. Girl, this is a booty call. He is not spousal material. The whole time I was reading this, I kept thinking, girl, no. Just no. Stop calling him. I don’t know, maybe I’m just getting too old to read these kinds of memoirs.

Whoa, that was a long review. I have feelings, I guess. Moving on.

The Story Hour. I enjoyed this book about the relationship between two women; one from India, the other her psychiatrist. Midway through I thought I knew where it was going, but it turns out I didn’t at all. I like that. The major theme was the mistakes that we make, how we atone for them, and can we forgive others’ mistakes as well as our own. Thrity Umrigar is a real talent; her ability to craft characters that are multi-dimensional is breathtaking. It also made me think about the judgements we make about people, and how there is always so much more to their stories than what we see.

It’s been a more social week than usual; lots of visits with friends, so I’m feeling happy coming into May. May! Already! Every month it feels shocking to change the calendar. Happy May to you, my friends. xo

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Isolation Chamber Edition

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Full disclosure: I had a very different Favourite Things planned for this month, but I decided to write a little about my experience with The Plague instead. You’ll just have to wait for Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Daily Glow-Up Edition! I’m sure you are all dying to know about my new favourite CC Cream; soon, my pretties.

Okay, that’s cruel. It’s by IT Cosmetics and it’s called “Your Skin But Better.”

As I mentioned in my last post, all four of us came down with The Covid, and our experience was that it was very, very mild. I have been pretty sanguine about the whole thing for several months now, but I do not want to tell you how to feel or to negate your experience in any way. I am just sharing my experience.

To be honest, if this was pre-2020, we would have just gone about our normal day-to-day lives with the kind of symptoms we had. Obviously we followed all the protocols as soon as my son tested positive, but remember back in the Before Times, when we would have just Pushed Through? Remember taking Advil Cold and Sinus and just going to work or to school, never thinking of calling in sick unless we had literally one foot in the grave, merrily spreading our germs to all and sundry? Thankfully, those days are gone, and I have to say it was kind of nice to be forced into isolation without being very sick at all. Forced rest is quite lovely, and we were lucky to have such mild cases.

Well, I say “lucky,” but a big part of that was due to the efficacy of vaccines. My husband has a couple of health issues that are largely controlled but that have been linked to severe outcomes, so I credit science and his vaccination status for his bout: he merely had a sore throat for about twelve hours, and an on-again-off-again headache for a couple of days. Had this happened a year or more ago, things could have ended up very differently, and I will always be breathtakingly grateful that this was our experience.

I think it goes without saying that one of my favourite things is VACCINES. I will get boosted for the rest of my life, if needed.

Again, this is my lived experience. Yours might be very different. I have many friends who are very wary and anxious about contracting Covid for a variety of reasons, so I am definitely not minimizing those feelings. I am saying that we all got off very easy – my younger son, for example, NEVER developed any symptoms at all. Many people have reported that they had symptoms like a “mild cold,” but I wouldn’t even say that. The only symptom I had was being tired and low energy for a couple of days. I know many people who got quite sick with fevers and pain, and others who have suffered Long Covid, and I feel very, very fortunate. I am generally a very healthy person, but similarly healthy people have had very bad experiences with Covid, so general health isn’t always an indicator.

This is a very long preamble to say that I wanted to share with you the things that helped me through my bout, and resulting isolation.

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The Isolation Chamber Edition

My Beauty Has Always Been A Curse; Ew, David

My love of the Golden Girls is well known. I have loved that show since the 80s and I was excited to see that it’s on Disney Plus, which is one of the many streaming services we seem to have that I never use. I have been watching one episode week, just like it’s 1985, and at this rate I’ll finish the series in 2029, give or take a few months. My kids like to say I’m binge-watching something if I watch more than three episodes a month, so I guess I’m binging?

The writing is just so good in that show, and I love the costumes and set design. I read that Rue McClanahan had it in her contract that she could keep all of the clothes she wore on the show, so I like to imagine her closet overflowing with super-colourful separates. Also, she was only four years older than I am now, when the show started.

I know I’m about seven years late to the party, but my husband and I have started watching Schitt’s Creek, and WOW, do I love it. So far we’ve finished the first season, and I have heard – from all my friends who have been telling me to watch it all these years – that it only gets better.

She Puzzled Until Her Puzzler Was Sore

I love puzzles, but I never start one unless I know I have time to become obsessed with it and have it completely take over my life. Well, hello there, Covid Isolation!

Isn’t this cute? One of my students gave it to me a few weeks ago, and I felt like this was the absolute perfect time to put it together. It was not a difficult puzzle at all, which was good, as I was kind of fuzzy and exhausted, and it was a really cute and fun one to do. I quibble with the “world’s cutest dog” label though; in my mind, that title belongs to Barkley.

I Heart My Library

I’m always a little surprised when a person tells me that they don’t like to use libraries; when the libraries closed in 2020, I felt like a little part of me died. Don’t get me wrong, I love OWNING books and I HAVE many books:

But I read well over a hundred books a year, and if I were to buy that many books I would be a) broke, and b) drowning in books. I only have so much space, people! I always have a nice big stack of library books on my side table, usually because I put a ton on hold and then they all come in at once, even the ones for which I am way down in the queue. Isn’t that funny when that happens? Luckily I had just picked up several holds before the plague hit us, so I was able to work my way through the stack.

This is my current stack, and oooohhhh you guys, I’m excited about all of these titles. Reviews to come!

Relax and Restore

I love restorative yoga and I do one such practice per week. For those of you not familiar, restorative yoga is made up of very slow-moving, long-held asana, usually with bolsters and blankets. The goal is very gentle opening of the body, while being completely comfortable and supported. To give you an idea, when I used to teach restorative classes, there would be about four or five relaxed, supported asana in a one-hour class. There are a ton of books on the subject, and I’m sure many examples on the internet, but here are two of my favourite postures, that do not require any blankets or bolsters – although you could use them, if you wanted.

Child’s resting pose is so great for the back and shoulders, and if it is painful for the knees to be in this position, you could add a rolled-up blanket between your knees and hamstrings, or support your chest and head with a bolster or pillow.

Viparita Karani, or legs up the wall, is probably my number-one favourite restorative pose. It’s so great for the back and for circulation, as well as allowing a very gentle stretch for hamstrings. If your hamstrings are a bit tight, then simply move your body farther away from the wall to allow for a more gentle experience. I will sometimes lie like this for twenty minutes; if you like guided meditations, this is a good posture in which to listen to one.

I wanted to include these photos to show you that lack of space need not be a deterrent in yoga. You can see how tight we are for space, but it works. Would I rather have a devoted home studio? Obviously yes but I take what I can get, and what I can get is the space between the kitchen and the dining room.

Food, Glorious Food

I couldn’t believe how hungry I was when I had Covid. I certainly did not experience any loss of appetite, taste, or smell. If anything, it was the opposite: even though my activity level was about 1/20 of normal, I was ravenous constantly, and everything tasted great. I am, as you all know, a big proponent of Listening To My Body, and my body was telling me that it Needed Food To Heal. Is this what it feels like to be a teen boy? I was So Hungry, even after a full meal, and so between meals I grazed constantly, for three straight days.

This is a good time to tell you about one of my favourite things: dried fruit. Now hear me out! I am constantly mocked in my family for my love of dried fruit, but if Fruit is Nature’s Candy, then Dried Fruit is Nature’s Gummy Bears: delicious, sweet, and chewy.

These are my favourite dried fruits, which I buy at Costco, but they aren’t always available. Each type is only available a few months out of the year, so I tend to buy a few bags at a time. Am I hoarding? Maybe. I regret nothing!

My sister-in-law (and my brother, too, but let’s be real: it was my sister-in-law who arranged this) sent me this incredible Edible Arrangement and a box of cookies for our anniversary and my son’s birthday – both yesterday! – and I feel that this is the time to mention them because a) Fruit Is Nature’s Candy, b) chocolate-dipped fruit is the greatest thing ever invented, and c) cookies.

Several cookies somehow went missing BEFORE the photo was taken! There are thieves among us.

Those were my Favourite Things this month; this wasn’t what I thought I was going to talk about, but it sure was fun. What were your favourites this month? xo

Marital Mismatches and Superpowers; One Hundred and Two Weeks In

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It feels like I was JUST saying that February is tomorrow, and here we are, MARCH is tomorrow! February flew by; part of it was that it felt like Life Was Hectic, with wrestling tournaments and a new school semester and a five-day weekend thrown in for good measure, but part of it was that we have had absolutely gorgeous, mild weather in a I Can’t Believe It’s February kind of way. This, however, came to an abrupt end this past week; I had to put on my snowpants, again, to go for a walk.

It’s weather like this that makes automatic car starters so popular around here, for people who don’t have garages. I mean, obviously. I am no expert on this subject, but I can only assume that if a person were to use an automatic car starter while their car was in a garage, they might drop dead of carbon monoxide poisoning on entering the garage, unless the garage door was open, but if it was, why would you need the automatic car starter? Why would you go into the garage, open the door, and then use an automatic car starter? Why wouldn’t you just start your car?

Anyway, automatic car starters. I don’t have one – I have a garage, and I use it – but I’m sure they are great for weather like we had this past week. As I was walking the other day, attired as above, I started to pass a truck parked on the street, and then that truck started lightly honking its horn. I thought maybe it was a neighbour, trying to get my attention, but then I wasn’t sure how anyone would know I was me, dressed as I was, with sunglasses to boot. Startled, I looked up, but no one was in the truck. Then the truck started, and I thought, oh, automatic car starter and kept on my way. Shortly after that, the same thing happened with ANOTHER vehicle. And then another one! Three times this happened to me in a sixty minute walk, a light honk and then the car starting just as I was passing it, with no one in the vehicle.

I actually started to wonder if I had suddenly developed the world’s weirdest and most useless superpower, the ability to start cars merely by passing them on the street. Imagine! It would have been nicer to suddenly develop the ability to fly, or control the weather, or even swing from buildings using webs shooting out of my own wrists, but I will admit I will take anything I can get in the superpower front.

As I was walking, I was listening to a podcast that was recorded in the summer, in Los Angeles, and one of the hosts mentioned that she hates showering, and showers only when she has to, which turns out to be every three to four days. Now, before I get further, I am going to say that if you are a person who is of similar mindset, I am not judging you: I assume we all know our own bodies and needs best, and this is a safe space, we are in the Trust Tree here. You do you.

Personally, I am a Daily Shower person, and I realize this is a great privilege of the Modern Age, but my Daily Shower is an Anchor in my day, and without it I feel like I would drift off into the Sea of Life. Even though I do not wash my hair every time I shower – that I do only about every 2-3 days – I feel refreshed and happy and like I hit the Reset Button Of Life every time I step out of the shower. It’s an important ritual in my day, and also, if you’ve ever seen me post-daily-workout, you would probably think a daily shower should not only be encouraged, but vital.

I get sweaty, is what I’m saying. I haven’t weighed myself since August 2020, and I don’t plan on weighing myself ever again, but sometimes I wonder how much water weight I lose in a workout. I’m a person who sweats a lot and I shall not sweat-shame myself, but honestly. I could wring out a tank top post-workout.

Back to the podcast. After the host mentioned her distaste for showers, the other host asked if her husband was still showering twice a day and that brings me to my whole point. Twice a day showers feels like a lot, but I have definitely done that in the summer, after a day spent outside gardening or hiking, covered in sunscreen and bug spray. But what I have a hard time reconciling in my head is what is their marriage like? You never know, of course, what goes on in someone’s marriage, but if my husband – who also showers daily – started showering every 3-4 days, I think it would end in divorce. I just couldn’t handle it. I recognize, again, privilege and that our bodies adjust to what we do to them, but still.

It’s the mismatch that gets me. It’s not like I think my husband and I should be clones of each other, because that would be weird and disturbing, and also I would not want to be married to my own clone, god, there can’t be TWO of us. But I also don’t think that Opposites Attract, or if they do Attract, they don’t Stay Attracted, if you know what I mean.

I have been thinking about this because we are coming up to our twentieth anniversary – twenty years! – in a few weeks. I find it interesting, there are so many behaviours that would never bother me if anyone else in the world did them, but if it was my husband, NO. NO SIR. The following would put an actual strain on my marriage, an I don’t think this is WORKING kind of strain: smoking, leaving dirty clothes on the floor instead of in the hamper, drug use, neglecting his health, and, importantly, less frequent showering than me. Fortunately, none of those things have come to pass, so we shall happily celebrate our China Anniversary later this month, minus the china.

Look at that sweet young thing! She had no idea that in twenty years, she’d be writing about marital shower habits.

Pandemic Reading

Notes From A Small Island. When I posted this on Instagram, a friend introduced me to the Bill Bryson Theory: the first one you read is hilarious, and then each subsequent title is progressively less funny. YES. I have enjoyed Bryson so much in previous books but this, meh. It follows him on a seven-week tour of Britain, his adopted country, and yes, this was published in 1995 so it is obviously dated and yes, Britain in the 80s and 90s was a grim and depressing place to be, but ugh. This book was so dull and disappointing. There were a couple of amusing anecdotes and some interesting facts, but whoever reviewed this at The Globe and Mail – “Doubled over belly shakes and seltzer through the nose funny” – was maybe drunk.

Black Is The Body. This was excellent! I love a good essay collection and this one was insightful and thoughtful. The first essay, about the author being randomly stabbed at a coffee shop, was startling; the rest of the book deals with race, home, marriage, and motherhood, all tying back to her body and what it means to be black in America. 

The Echo Chamber. This is a very clever satire and commentary about appearances, social media, and cancel culture. The Cleverley family is an absolutely ridiculous group of caricatures, but there’s a thoughtful and interesting pre-SM backstory. Also interesting to me is that it was published in 2021 and there are quite a few references to past mask-wearing, vaccinations, and how fun it is to go shopping again, now that the pandemic is over. Oh, sweetie. The epilogue I could have done without, but in general it was smart and amusing. As I say, it’s satire, so definitely not for everyone, as there are a few storylines that feel distasteful.

My Boyfriend Wrote A Book About Me. I am NOT the correct demographic for this book, that much is obvious. It is supposed to be a humorous book of essays about bad dates, relationships, and one-night stands, but I found it so terribly sad. The whole time, I kept thinking Oh, sweetie, no. No, don’t sleep with that guy. No. That’s not going to help your self-esteem. It’s been a long time since I was on the dating scene but hoo boy, this woman had literally the worst luck with men. As a preview, her ex wrote a book about her, referring to her as his “fat-assed girlfriend,” which should give you an idea about the general temperature of the book.

There has been a lot of terrible news this week, as we are all aware. I haven’t mentioned the incredible sadness and fear for the people living in Ukraine, for all my Ukrainian friends, but of course that has been on my mind this week. Lots of love to all of you, from my little corner of the world. xo

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The I Choo-Choo-Choose Me Edition

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I am obsessed with the song i by Kendrick Lamar. Do you know it? When he heard me playing it and singing along, my son told me that i is on The Greatest Hip Hop Album Of All Time, which I didn’t know, but which made me feel like this:

Or maybe this:

I would probably feel more hip if I didn’t hear the song on a Peloton ride, which, like all middle-aged suburban ladies who have joined the Peloton cult, is how I am exposed to all new music. Case in point: watching the Superbowl 2021 halftime show, I exclaimed “I know this song, I heard it on Peloton!” It was, of course, The Weeknd, which was top of the charts for much of 2020. This is what happens when you keep the radio tuned to 70s on 7, you miss out on the trends.

Note: the Superbowl 2022 halftime show was the best halftime show in the history of halftime shows, and I will DIE ON THIS HILL.

In any case, i is a great song, and I love myself goes through my head over and over on a regular basis.

It’s pithy but true: if we don’t show love to ourselves, how can we show up to the people around us or the world at large? We can’t.

Back in August 2020, I read the book Your Body Your Best Friend, and I am not exaggerating when I say that it was absolutely life-changing. I had picked it up on a whim at the library, and ended up buying a copy for myself, so I could reference it whenever I wanted.

I strongly believe that we need to be our own best friend, our own best cheerleader, and our own best supporter. We can’t show up as our best selves without loving ourselves, just as we are. One way to accomplish this is to do little things for ourselves, every day. We need to choose ourselves, and to choose things that make us happy and contented, and on that note:

Nicole’s Favourite Things: The I Choo-Choo-Choose Me Edition

Lube Up, Baby

I love the body lotions from Bath and Body Works, and a couple of times a year I go for the buy 3, get 3 deal. Every morning, right before my shower, I choose the scent I want for that day and set it out. It’s a pleasant tiny ritual that makes me happy every time. What a fun thing to choose every day! Warm Vanilla Sugar for a cozy day at home, Japanese Cherry Blossom for teaching, Saltwater Breeze for groceries?

It’s risky, but I have been choosing new scents in the store without being able to actually smell them, because of mask-wearing. One such new scent was the Fresh Cut Lilacs, and the first time I wore it, I smiled every time I caught a whiff of it, but I couldn’t pinpoint why. After a day of wearing it, I realized that it smells exactly like a Yardley body powder that I used to give my grandma for Christmas. Remember those? I am not saying that you want to smell like your own grandma, but I’m kind of saying you might want to smell like your own grandma. It’s very pleasing and happy-making.

Day By Day

This is my bedside table, and on it, among all the various items from my children and a clock radio dating from the early 90s, is a page-a-day calendar. I hadn’t had one since I worked in an office – probably it was a Far Side one – but I saw this while Christmas shopping and was immediately charmed. It’s put out by the New Yorker and every day has a short love story. I bought it thinking it was romantic love, and there is certainly that, but it’s much more: familial, friendship, unrequited. There are a lot more stories about breakups and death than you might think, but they are all very charming. I mean:

Another recent one was about noticing a person with the same groceries in her cart as the author, and wow, that resonated with me and my little life.

Line By Line

I am NOT a journal-keeper; I feel like this blog is journal enough. However, you may be surprised to know that I don’t share everything here. I know! Didn’t I just talk about my chin hair and my average tampon usage? Is nothing sacred? But it’s true, some things are private, even if I don’t mind talking endlessly about my moustache’s sudden youthful resurgence and what kind of bras I wear.

I don’t like the thought of writing in a traditional journal, but I decided to buy a five year, line-a-day journal and I love it. It’s so easy to summarize the day in one little line, and I don’t need to go into my feelings in depth or anything.

It’s kind of perfect for these times when I can’t remember when something happened. My great-grandma kept a journal that was literally just weather, what she had planted in her garden, and something small about her day; it sounds like not much, but I really like looking at it, and I want to have a similar record for my own use. Who knows, maybe I’ll have a great-granddaughter who will read it and think wow, boring, and yet scintillating.

Accessorize!

Back when I was 14 or 15, a guy said to me that I “wore more jewelry than Mr. T,” which was an exaggeration, but only a slight one.

I mean, he wasn’t wrong. I do love jewelry, it’s true; I enjoy the little ritual of choosing my jewelry each day when I get dressed. Some things are default; I always wear my rings, watch, and Pandora bracelets, but I like to choose different necklaces based on what I’m wearing, plus left-wrist bracelets and earrings.

A funny story about earrings: I generally wear little silver sleeper hoops, and I don’t take them out. Back before Christmas, I was over visiting with my sister-in-law, and I realized that one of them had fallen out. I couldn’t find it and honestly, I was a bit devastated. I have quite a few other pairs of silver hoop earrings, gifted to me over the years by my parents, and so I wasn’t devastated for long. I just got into the habit of choosing earrings each day, and it was pretty fun.

Then, just this past week, I was putting clothes in the dryer and lo, there was my earring! The thing is, I lost the earring before I got the new dryer. How did it get there? Was it in a sweater I hadn’t washed until now? That seems suspect, but I guess it could have happened. Anyway, the positive thing is I have my favourite pair of earrings. The negative thing is now I’m just…wearing them all the time and not choosing new ones daily. Wow, life is hard.

Put On A Happy Outfit

I already wrote about clothes this week, and how much I love getting dressed every day, but what I didn’t write about was how I also love putting on my workout clothes. Sure, I could wear just anything to work out in, but why? Why not something cute and fun? I set out my workout clothes every night before I go to bed, and it’s always fun choosing a cute tee to go with my tank and leggings.

This last one cracks me up; it was in my Christmas stocking this year, and I texted a photo of it to my similarly Austen-loving sister-in-law (HI JO). Whenever something crappy happens, our shorthand now is “Fuck Lydia.” When the diploma exams were cancelled, I got a text from her saying only “Fuck Lydia,” which I think sums up things nicely. You should try it! It’s surprisingly wide-reaching.

Slight digression, I was chatting with my friend Nicole (HI NICOLE) about this shirt, which led to a conversation about Which Austen Character Are You? We all want to be Elizabeth, but like Marie says in When Harry Met Sally, “Everybody thinks they have good taste and a sense of humour, but they can’t ALL have good taste.” Everyone wants to be Elizabeth Bennett, or Jo March, but not everyone can be Elizabeth Bennett or Jo March. (I’m an Amy, honestly). I admitted to Nicole that I think I’m actually Charlotte Lucas, not because my husband is a Mr. Collins – NO, he emphatically is not – but because I am a very practical person and I make life decisions for practical, rather than emotional, reasons. She admitted that she’s a Mary, and every time I think of that, I laugh. Literally, no one else in the world would admit to being a) Charlotte Lucas, and b) Mary Bennett. What a pair of Nicoles we are! Maybe we are just really self-aware. I don’t want to think of any alternative explanation.

These are all my favourite daily things this month, things I choo-choo-choose every day. What do you do to choo-choo-choose yourself? I hope it’s something lovely. xo