High Street Bingo

Starting back to school on a Tuesday after a holiday virtually guarantees that I will be in a constant state of confusion for the entire week.  This week has been no exception.  Yesterday I had to keep reminding myself that it was WEDNESDAY and that the following day was THURSDAY and I had committed to volunteer in Mark’s class for the morning.  So today I spent the morning volunteering for what is known as an in-class field trip, or when the class brings a presenter with hands-on materials into the class.  It is a well known fact in my family that although I spend a vast amount of time doing volunteer work for the school, I WILL NOT volunteer for traditional, bussed, second location field trips.  I do not want to ride on the school bus.  I do not want to be responsible for a group of children that aren’t mine in crowded, unfamiliar settings.  Also, as my children have pointed out to me, I’m just not that much fun.

However, I’m here to tell you that this morning’s “The Amazing Race Alberta!” was a barrel of fun!  I learned a great deal about the boreal forest and the Canadian Shield.  The object of the game was to visit six stations that boasted facts about the different regions of Alberta, and in the end the group decided WHICH region was the best to build a brand new town in.  Also the group was tasked with naming the town, choosing a mascot and slogan, and deciding what industries would be represented.

Are you still with me?  It was actually way more fun than it sounds, possibly because this age group seems to be up my alley.  The last time I volunteered for one of these in-class field trips, I ended up spending a vast amount of time digging googly eyes out of glue sticks.  I much enjoy the non-crafty, brainstorm-then-write-it-down age group.

I found it somewhat interesting that the project was named The Amazing Race but there was no racing actually involved.  It reminded me of my fantasy Amazing Race team, which consists of myself and my friends Hannah, Beck, and Misty, the latter of whom is the only one in our group with a strong sense of direction, the ability to drive anything, and who can get through the day without bursting into tears.  The rest of us would have to rely on being fan favourites as the team that cries a lot and gets lost all the time.  We could possibly get sponsorship from a line of waterproof mascara.

Speaking of sponsorship, as you know, I’m not a “sponsored post” kind of girl, but I do often receive product pitches that, if I wrote about them, I would receive those products for free.  Generally, they are nothing that I – or you, dear reader – would be interested in reading about: mainly household cleaning products or television programming for very young children, and so they get deleted almost immediately.  However, the following came to my in-box the other day, and I saved it because it made me feel like I’ve finally made it as a writer:

Hi,
I am currently working for a high-street bingo client who is trying to get some articles live with links back to their homepage from websites and blogs just like yours.
What they are looking for is for bloggers to write the content in order for the articles to look natural on their site, you can do this by writing about topics such as:
– Personal Bingo experiences of yours or of a friend.
– Top three ways to relax when the kids are out of the house or finally fall asleep (only one of the three reasons has to be about on-line bingo)
-Stuff to do on rainy days..
Or anything like this…let me know if you can think of anything better.
Please not you will not be linking to some spammy site at the back of the internet, I am working for an actual betting company with shops in the high street.
I am very much looking forward to your response,
Best regards Jack
I do not even know where to start with the awesomeness.  Is it the references to a high-street bingo client/ actual betting company with shops in the high street?  Is it the assumption that I actually have personal bingo experiences?  No, I think it’s the request to write about the top three ways I relax without the children, and only one of those ways has to be about on-line bingo.
Only one?  I’m not sure how I got this pitch, but prior to it I did not even know that on-line bingo was in existence.  Insultingly there is no reference to compensation anywhere in that email.  Perhaps Jack thought that just writing about bingo would be a reward in itself.  Sorry, Jack.

Comments

  1. Yeah, and the whole ‘make it look natural’ thing. This is why I can’t do sponsored posts. Some people manage to do them and not sound fake and weird, but I don’t have the knack. Not that I didn’t think long and hard about that pitch I got the other day for a product that was sure to elicit ‘peels of laughter’ from my children. Blogging about stuff for no pay and getting my children peeled in the process? Irresistible!

  2. Last week oldest went back to school on a Wednesday and I was completely screwed up as to what day of the week it was for some time. Problematic since I had things I had to do on specific days at work, but keep nearly missing thinking it was some other day. Bah.

    My husband and I split volunteering duties well: I prefer to volunteer in the classroom for regularly scheduled activities such as writing workshop or math. He prefers to do field trips. Am thinking he has finally gone totally around the bend because he volunteered to be one of the parent chaperones on the overnight field trip. There is no way in hell I’d do that. Just. No.

  3. Someone mentioned that the local kids started back to school on Monday and my two were pissed. “You made us start doing math on January 2nd.” HA! Suckers.

    The use of “high street” leads me to believe that Jack is based in the UK. Maybe “bingo” has a sexual meaning there?, ie ‘cottaging,’ ‘shagging’ and ‘bangers and mash.’ All of my bingo experiences involve volunteering to run bingos as fundraisers so a bingo post by me would mostly involve complaints about cigarette smoke and lucky trolls.

  4. Three comments already and NO ONE has talked about the brilliance that is our imaginary Amazing Race team? BAH.

    In my seven years of blogging, I’ve had one – ONE – pitch. I was supposed to blog about an online furniture retailer. They were not, oddly enough, offering me free furniture. Blogging: I’m doing it wrong.

  5. WOW! High street bingo. That is really something special. Maybe you get to play on-line bingo for free as your compensation. I hear it’s relaxing.
    I dare you to write about bingo anyway. Just for fun.

    Speaking of fun, your twitter conversations about the Amazing Race Weeping Ladies on Goats or whatever is HIGHLY entertaining and better than TV, honestly.

  6. Miss Elise says

    Perhaps Jack should be a Bingo Volunteer for his school age children…he’d get heaps of experience and then write about Bingo himself…not a very interesting proposition…he could even change his name for his column…and sign it…and BINGO was his name-o!

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